Welcome to Gaia! ::

Hey guys, I know many of you guys on here like to fap it. I would occasionally when I was younger, but I stopped. After I would do it, I would feel really depressed. When I had my first boyfriend, we would often do sexual things together. When we did, I would have to tell him to stop and I would start crying uncontrollably and be hit with the most intense wave of sadness. I wanted nothing more to run far away from him and throw myself off a bridge or jump into traffic, whichever I found first. After a while, it kind of went away. Sometimes after sex, I would still feel extremely depressed though. That boyfriend and I broke up about a month ago. I have been lonely so I have decided to masturbate again. I just got done and I am so depressed. I just want to die. It's so bad right now. I don't know how I can go on living. I think there may be something wrong with me. Has this ever happened to you guys?

Also usually when people masturbate, they watch porn or think about someone or something. When I do, I can't think about anything. Just random images flow through my mind, often colors and abstract looking things. I thought this may be related.
Chase it away's avatar

Dapper Lunatic

It sounds to me like you may have been sexually abused when you where younger, because as far as I know you're supposed to have a feeling of euphoria.
Chase it away
It sounds to me like you may have been sexually abused when you where younger, because as far as I know you're supposed to have a feeling of euphoria.

I am thinking I may have been too... I don't remember ever being so though. I am also overcome with a huge amount of guilt during sex or masturbation.
Knobist's avatar

Hilarious Prophet

Depression after choking the chicken happens to me too because I know that I just got off to the thought of someone's daughter. Even though it's just a fantasy I still don't feel good enough, the shame I feel is odd.
Metroid Dread's avatar

Dapper Dabbler

7,450 Points
  • Invisibility 100
  • First step to fame 200
  • Flatterer 200
i dont get depressed after sex, but i dont want anything to do with her for 30-60 minutes afterwards
Deliacroix's avatar

Lunatic

I haven't since I was a teenager, actually. I started having sex at 19 and although I've only slept with two past boyfriends, the fact that I've had sex has made masturbation impossible. I get no pleasure from it at all.
Pseudo-Onkelos's avatar

Adored Admirer

I used to feel guilty after masturbating, especially because of what I fantasized about. Of course, that was because I was a Christian at the time. Now my consciousness is desensitized to some extent. Maybe you should speak to a professional about your problem.
Skataforeva
Chase it away
It sounds to me like you may have been sexually abused when you where younger, because as far as I know you're supposed to have a feeling of euphoria.

I am thinking I may have been too... I don't remember ever being so though. I am also overcome with a huge amount of guilt during sex or masturbation.

I was 19 when I finally realized I'd experienced sexual abuse as a child.
The mind is an interesting thing and has defense mechanisms that can block certain
memories. I'm not saying this definitely happened to you, but it's worth exploring with
a counselor if the problem continues.

Were you ever taught negative sexual views at home? Are your parents super religious?
What exactly makes you feel bad; the fact that you did something sexual? Or do you
just get overcome by an unnameable sadness?
weed-chan
Skataforeva
Chase it away
It sounds to me like you may have been sexually abused when you where younger, because as far as I know you're supposed to have a feeling of euphoria.

I am thinking I may have been too... I don't remember ever being so though. I am also overcome with a huge amount of guilt during sex or masturbation.

I was 19 when I finally realized I'd experienced sexual abuse as a child.
The mind is an interesting thing and has defense mechanisms that can block certain
memories. I'm not saying this definitely happened to you, but it's worth exploring with
a counselor if the problem continues.

Were you ever taught negative sexual views at home? Are your parents super religious?
What exactly makes you feel bad; the fact that you did something sexual? Or do you
just get overcome by an unnameable sadness?

I will try to. Maybe I need to go back into therapy for this. I have never told anyone about this besides my boyfriend really.

No, my parents were always open sexually, especially my mom. They are not religious but I recently started going to church a year ago, but this problem has been around way before then. In the past it would just be sadness. This time it was a mix of I did something wrong and the same sadness.
I used to feel guilty and sad after fapping bc I was shammed for it and for being gay. Your ex BFs sound like jerks form what you've said about them before. I think you just need to create positive sexual experiences and give yourself some loving.
WHlTE TlGER 2
I used to feel guilty and sad after fapping bc I was shammed for it and for being gay. Your ex BFs sound like jerks form what you've said about them before. I think you just need to create positive sexual experiences and give yourself some loving.

Well I have had this problem long before I even met him.
SpunkyStrikesAgain's avatar

Dangerous Bloodsucker

Sounds like you should talk to a professional about this.
Bornes's avatar

Aged Phantom

User ImageIs it just sadness or do you also feel like you have a cold?

I used to be guilty and cry after sex too. But it seems like what's happening to you is really serious. If it only happens after you c**, you could have Post-orgasmic illness syndrome.

You could talk to a doctor about it.
Peppermint Coca's avatar

Shapeshifter

That happens to me once in a while, maybe because when I masturbate usually I think of someone I can't have. I always thought of this one guy I know who I really like. We're dating now so I definitely don't feel sad anymore.
zaptar13's avatar

Familiar Poster

You need some professional help.

Quick Reply

Submit
Manage Your Items
Other Stuff
Get GCash
Offers
Get Items
More Items
Where Everyone Hangs Out
Other Community Areas
Virtual Spaces
Fun Stuff
Gaia's Games