Long Distance Relationsips (LDR) Support Thread

[minsco]

Chibi_Ice_Angel

minsco

LynJah

I know LDRs aren`t perfect - so a question comes to mind.

Have anyone of you guys ever had that feeling of insecure? I`ve always been the jealous type, & I get so worried if my guy talks to other girls. It`s the constant what ifs, you know?

I know I can trust my guy 100%, but those damn insecurities always make things so hard. How do you deal with those feelings?

My Guy Has Been Asked out Many Times, Since We Started going Out, and He Has Turned Them All Down. It's Trobbling Knowing He Is So Popular Among Other Girls, But He always Tells Me About It, And He Say's He'd Much rather Be With Me, Because I'm A Lot More speacial To Him, So It Makes It Easier Knowing That Even If There Aer Other Girls, He'd Rather Be With me, And He Makes Sure I Know That.

Just remember that he turned down those girls for a reason. He has more emotions nad feeligns for you then them. Just remind yourself of that and don't let those feelings get the better of you.

Yeah, I Trust Him, And I Try Just To Think That He'd Rather Be With Me Then Anyone Else.

[SinfulGuillotine]

Chibi_Ice_Angel

SinfulGuillotine

I have a question for people in LDRs who do get the chance to see their partners in person from time to time.

My boyfriend doesn't live too terribly far away, so we get to see each other maybe once a month or once every other month on average, depending on our schedules. Usually only for a weekend at a time. And seeing him is great, of course, and I'm thankful that we live close enough for relatively frequent visits to be possible, but I often feel sort of pressured to do as much together as we possibly can, since we usually only have two or three days per visit to be together.

Does anyone else ever feel rushed or pressured to make the most out of visits as possible, and if so, how do you deal with it?

I am feeling the same thing you are. My boyfriend is coming to visit hopefully this spring break and I have often felt the way you are feeling. Just remember, don't do anything you are not sure you are absolutely ready for. It sounds like there are sure to be more visits to come so if you don't get to do everything you want on this visit then plan for the next. I hope the advice helps heart

It's not an issue of sex, if that's how I made it sound.

It's mroe an issue of me feeling like I want to do 6 billion things with him when I see him and only having 48 hours to do all those things. Should I cook that recipe that I dicovered last week that I know he'll love, or do I take him to my favourite restaurant? Do we stay in the whole weekend louging around naked, watching films, and ordering take-away, or do we run around the city seeing sights and visiting museums? All of the above? How much of each?

I've never been good at managing time, and trying to figure out this stuff drives me crazy sometimes.

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

Bard of Hyrule

While I am in an LDR and highly interested in a support topic for these types of relationships, I can't read the light pink text at all! =(

I apologize. I will write in black text from now on. Thank you for your interest in the thread.

[LynJah]

Chef Raiz

Thanks, but I think this is far from unordianry. I mean, look at how many people are in LDR's. It's so great! I think LDR's are good for people, but you learn to appreciate your signifigant other so much more. You appreciate every moment you are with them, and sometimes even the moments without. Because those moments without, are simply filled with thoughts of them. <333
And yes, it is a magical feeling. whee

Magical indeed. 4laugh 4laugh 4laugh 4laugh 4laugh I think I`m gonna burst with too much magic in my heart. rofl

[Cheferoni]

sidewalkkittie

Chef Raiz

I think LDR's are good for people, but you learn to appreciate your signifigant other so much more. You appreciate every moment you are with them, and sometimes even the moments without. Because those moments without, are simply filled with thoughts of them. <333
And yes, it is a magical feeling. whee

I could not agree with you more! Tony says it all the time. He's glad it happened this way because we will never take advantage of our time together because of how much time we spend apart. LDR's are a whole other plane of difficulties and joys.

Exactly! I see couples walking around school and whathaveyou, and they look at each other with love in their eyes, but they break up weeks later. They get bored of each other. But in an LDR, you can never get bored. There's always something new, expecially if they live really far away. Somewhere completely foreign.
I'm so happy for you and Tony! ^.^
Hurrah for successful LDR's! Hurrah!

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

Chef Raiz

sidewalkkittie

Chef Raiz

I think LDR's are good for people, but you learn to appreciate your signifigant other so much more. You appreciate every moment you are with them, and sometimes even the moments without. Because those moments without, are simply filled with thoughts of them. <333
And yes, it is a magical feeling. whee

I could not agree with you more! Tony says it all the time. He's glad it happened this way because we will never take advantage of our time together because of how much time we spend apart. LDR's are a whole other plane of difficulties and joys.

Exactly! I see couples walking around school and whathaveyou, and they look at each other with love in their eyes, but they break up weeks later. They get bored of each other. But in an LDR, you can never get bored. There's always something new, expecially if they live really far away. Somewhere completely foreign.
I'm so happy for you and Tony! ^.^
Hurrah for successful LDR's! Hurrah!

That is so true. I believe that being in LDRS actually helps couples relationships grow deeper, not tears them apart like everyone likes to think.

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

SinfulGuillotine

Chibi_Ice_Angel

SinfulGuillotine

I have a question for people in LDRs who do get the chance to see their partners in person from time to time.

My boyfriend doesn't live too terribly far away, so we get to see each other maybe once a month or once every other month on average, depending on our schedules. Usually only for a weekend at a time. And seeing him is great, of course, and I'm thankful that we live close enough for relatively frequent visits to be possible, but I often feel sort of pressured to do as much together as we possibly can, since we usually only have two or three days per visit to be together.

Does anyone else ever feel rushed or pressured to make the most out of visits as possible, and if so, how do you deal with it?

I am feeling the same thing you are. My boyfriend is coming to visit hopefully this spring break and I have often felt the way you are feeling. Just remember, don't do anything you are not sure you are absolutely ready for. It sounds like there are sure to be more visits to come so if you don't get to do everything you want on this visit then plan for the next. I hope the advice helps heart

It's not an issue of sex, if that's how I made it sound.

It's mroe an issue of me feeling like I want to do 6 billion things with him when I see him and only having 48 hours to do all those things. Should I cook that recipe that I dicovered last week that I know he'll love, or do I take him to my favourite restaurant? Do we stay in the whole weekend louging around naked, watching films, and ordering take-away, or do we run around the city seeing sights and visiting museums? All of the above? How much of each?

I've never been good at managing time, and trying to figure out this stuff drives me crazy sometimes.

Maybe ask him prior to the visit which things he would really like to do. Then you can really maxamize the time you have with him.

[LynJah]

SinfulGuillotine

It's not an issue of sex, if that's how I made it sound.

It's mroe an issue of me feeling like I want to do 6 billion things with him when I see him and only having 48 hours to do all those things. Should I cook that recipe that I dicovered last week that I know he'll love, or do I take him to my favourite restaurant? Do we stay in the whole weekend louging around naked, watching films, and ordering take-away, or do we run around the city seeing sights and visiting museums? All of the above? How much of each?

I've never been good at managing time, and trying to figure out this stuff drives me crazy sometimes.

Do whatever you feel like when you`re there. You don`t need to be all crazy trying to plan every second. Just relax and enjoy your time with him (you know, like a vacation heart )- I`m sure that`ll be enough for the two of you.

[Cheferoni]

Chibi_Ice_Angel

Chef Raiz

sidewalkkittie

Chef Raiz

I think LDR's are good for people, but you learn to appreciate your signifigant other so much more. You appreciate every moment you are with them, and sometimes even the moments without. Because those moments without, are simply filled with thoughts of them. <333
And yes, it is a magical feeling. whee

I could not agree with you more! Tony says it all the time. He's glad it happened this way because we will never take advantage of our time together because of how much time we spend apart. LDR's are a whole other plane of difficulties and joys.

Exactly! I see couples walking around school and whathaveyou, and they look at each other with love in their eyes, but they break up weeks later. They get bored of each other. But in an LDR, you can never get bored. There's always something new, expecially if they live really far away. Somewhere completely foreign.
I'm so happy for you and Tony! ^.^
Hurrah for successful LDR's! Hurrah!

That is so true. I believe that being in LDRS actually helps couples relationships grow deeper, not tears them apart like everyone likes to think.

It's true. You develop a deep sense of trust in your other, as well as patience. Trust is a main one for most people I've noticed, since you can't keep an eye on them. But you just have believe and trust them.
Although, some people just aren't meant for LDR's... My friend was in one for about a month, it drove her crazy, not being able to see him every day, not speaking with him face to face. Not holding hands etc. She wanted the more 'physical' part of it. Not the bedtime stuff, just cuddling, hand holding etc.

[Peanetty Goodness]

LynJah

I know LDRs aren`t perfect - so a question comes to mind.

Have anyone of you guys ever had that feeling of insecure? I`ve always been the jealous type, & I get so worried if my guy talks to other girls. It`s the constant what ifs, you know?

I know I can trust my guy 100%, but those damn insecurities always make things so hard. How do you deal with those feelings?

I felt the same way when my boyfriend and I were apart.The way I dealt with them when I felt like that was to talk to my boyfriend and to tell him how I felt.He'd really listen and try to help me the best that he could.He'd always reassure me that I was the one he loved and nothing would change that.

[LynJah]

Chibi_Ice_Angel

That is so true. I believe that being in LDRS actually helps couples relationships grow deeper, not tears them apart like everyone likes to think.

Oh, and of course. One thing that comes to mind when I think about LDRs is that you can never second guess whether if he likes you just for the looks or personality. Or if he`s just "using me to get sex". gonk gonk

[Kitten Wants Bones]

Chef Raiz

sidewalkkittie

Chef Raiz

I think LDR's are good for people, but you learn to appreciate your signifigant other so much more. You appreciate every moment you are with them, and sometimes even the moments without. Because those moments without, are simply filled with thoughts of them. <333
And yes, it is a magical feeling. whee

I could not agree with you more! Tony says it all the time. He's glad it happened this way because we will never take advantage of our time together because of how much time we spend apart. LDR's are a whole other plane of difficulties and joys.

Exactly! I see couples walking around school and whathaveyou, and they look at each other with love in their eyes, but they break up weeks later. They get bored of each other. But in an LDR, you can never get bored. There's always something new, expecially if they live really far away. Somewhere completely foreign.
I'm so happy for you and Tony! ^.^
Hurrah for successful LDR's! Hurrah!

It is pretty exciting because we have very different life experiences, so even considering how well we know each other, every now and then we come across something very different and get a real kick out of it.

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

One interesting thing that has been touched upon but not elaborated on is the lack of physical intimacy. I know I miss that part of the relationship with my boyfriend. There are just some days when I want a hug or a hand to hold. I think it does make me appreciate him more though.

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

LynJah

Chibi_Ice_Angel

That is so true. I believe that being in LDRS actually helps couples relationships grow deeper, not tears them apart like everyone likes to think.

Oh, and of course. One thing that comes to mind when I think about LDRs is that you can never second guess whether if he likes you just for the looks or personality. Or if he`s just "using me to get sex". gonk gonk

That issue pops up in all relationships regardless of how close or far you are to your person.

[LynJah]

Chibi_Ice_Angel

One interesting thing that has been touched upon but not elaborated on is the lack of physical intimacy. I know I miss that part of the relationship with my boyfriend. There are just some days when I want a hug or a hand to hold. I think it does make me appreciate him more though.

When the intimacy really comes, I feel much deeper (no pun intended) in love. It`s not just having sex, it`s making heart heart heart .

I dunno, it`s just more passionate, I think. 3nodding