Long Distance Relationsips (LDR) Support Thread

[minsco]

Right Now I'm In An LDR, And It's Really Hard. We Are a Year Apart, Him 15 I'm 14. My Friends Introduced Me To Him On Myspace. I HAve Never Met Him In Real Life.
:[ I Don't Think We Ever Will Either. I Guess There's Hope, But I'm Not Sure. Tomarrow Will Be Our 7 MOnth Aniversary, But I Woun't Be Able To Talk To Him. He's Never On The Computer Much And He Dosen't Have A Phone I Can Talk To Him with. So I Only Talk To Him Once Or Twice A MOnth, If even THat. We Went 3 Months Without Talking Once. I Know A Lot Of People Have LDRs That work And They Are Happy With Them, I Guess It just Takes time, But I Don't Think What I Have Right Now Is really Good. I Find It Really Hard To Get To Know someone You HAve Never Met Before. My Bestfriend Is In The Same Kind of Thing, But She's A Lot Closer To Her Bf And They Know Everything About Eachother. It Works For Her, But It's Not The Same For Me. I've been Really Close To Losing Him Before To, So I Would Like To Meet Him Before Something Happens And I Never Get The Chance.

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

Gorrific

My sister is in one. I've always been kind of against them, but I'm being supportive. My fiance and I are taking her to visit him soon.

Its very nice that you are being so supportive of your sister. Support from family and friends can really help to foster a long distance relationship. Your sister should feel very blessed to have someone as understanding as you are, and even if you aren't totally for the relationship, its nice that you give your sister the support and guidence that is so crucial.

[sidewalkkittie]

Now this is my kind of thread.

My boyfriend and I met online three years ago. We were friends and chatted casually, him being the creator of an RPing website and me having been promoted to a moderator. Last year, the staff decided that we should all meet IRL, specifically at the Penny Arcade Expo in Seattle. Meeting face to face was what did it. It was quite literally love at first sight. By the end of the weekend, we were both reeling from all the emotions and very confused. I had been seriously dating a woman for much of the time that he had known me, so I kind of caught him off guard. And then, as he was hugging me goodbye, he kissed me on the cheek.

And here we are, five months and two trips across the country later, madly in love.

I am 22 (well tomorrow I am haha) and he is 21 (turning 22 in April). I live in Connecticut and he lives in California, 2964 miles apart. I have tentative plans to move in May. smile

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

minsco

Right Now I'm In An LDR, And It's Really Hard. We Are a Year Apart, Him 15 I'm 14. My Friends Introduced Me To Him On Myspace. I HAve Never Met Him In Real Life.
:[ I Don't Think We Ever Will Either. I Guess There's Hope, But I'm Not Sure. Tomarrow Will Be Our 7 MOnth Aniversary, But I Woun't Be Able To Talk To Him. He's Never On The Computer Much And He Dosen't Have A Phone I Can Talk To Him with. So I Only Talk To Him Once Or Twice A MOnth, If even THat. We Went 3 Months Without Talking Once. I Know A Lot Of People Have LDRs That work And They Are Happy With Them, I Guess It just Takes time, But I Don't Think What I Have Right Now Is really Good. I Find It Really Hard To Get To Know someone You HAve Never Met Before. My Bestfriend Is In The Same Kind of Thing, But She's A Lot Closer To Her Bf And They Know Everything About Eachother. It Works For Her, But It's Not The Same For Me. I've been Really Close To Losing Him Before To, So I Would Like To Meet Him Before Something Happens And I Never Get The Chance.

Problems like yours often pop up in LDRs. However there are other ways to communicate. Some couples like to talk on the phone or communicate through webcams. If the computer is not your best friend texting and good old fashioned snail mail can be good as well. Until you can meet him try to keep contact as much as possible.

[Veronica_Valentine]

Miss_Penguin_Princess

Veronica_Valentine

I am in LDR as of now. Me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 years. Only the past two months have been Long distance, he is only 4 hours away, but I am in another country. We saw each other everyday, and lived together for a year and a half. We originally moved from michigan to canada, he left everything behind so he could come up with me, sadly, it didn't work out that he could live here, so he is back in the states, restarting everything again. It been hard, but I have found it's easier if you occupy yourself, since why I am on gaia all the time. Also hearing from him everyday makes it easier. I'm sure this will make our relationship stronger,and I congratulate anyone that has successfully been through this, or going through any LDR. I will be moving down with him in March, until then, I will be anxiously waiting.

Awhh I wish you two the best of luck!

Thanks heart

[minsco]

Chibi_Ice_Angel

minsco

Right Now I'm In An LDR, And It's Really Hard. We Are a Year Apart, Him 15 I'm 14. My Friends Introduced Me To Him On Myspace. I HAve Never Met Him In Real Life.
:[ I Don't Think We Ever Will Either. I Guess There's Hope, But I'm Not Sure. Tomarrow Will Be Our 7 MOnth Aniversary, But I Woun't Be Able To Talk To Him. He's Never On The Computer Much And He Dosen't Have A Phone I Can Talk To Him with. So I Only Talk To Him Once Or Twice A MOnth, If even THat. We Went 3 Months Without Talking Once. I Know A Lot Of People Have LDRs That work And They Are Happy With Them, I Guess It just Takes time, But I Don't Think What I Have Right Now Is really Good. I Find It Really Hard To Get To Know someone You HAve Never Met Before. My Bestfriend Is In The Same Kind of Thing, But She's A Lot Closer To Her Bf And They Know Everything About Eachother. It Works For Her, But It's Not The Same For Me. I've been Really Close To Losing Him Before To, So I Would Like To Meet Him Before Something Happens And I Never Get The Chance.

Problems like yours often pop up in LDRs. However there are other ways to communicate. Some couples like to talk on the phone or communicate through webcams. If the computer is not your best friend texting and good old fashioned snail mail can be good as well. Until you can meet him try to keep contact as much as possible.

i Try, But The Only Way We Can Talk Is Gaia Or Aim, Which Is Ok When We Talk And All But I Wish I Could Here His Voice for once. he And His Friends Have Been In Bad relationships To Where They Aren't Very Trusting To Give Out THeir Phone Number.

[AcidicLemons]

:] I'll share my story.

We're both 19, met him in the middle of last year while role playing. xD
Haha, we had been role playing for about...a few months, & then we would talk to each other out-of-character, & we got to know each other better.

We added each other's MySpaces & continued to talk from then, & the rest is pretty much history.
We're planning on a meeting date this year, but it's gonna be hard since we're both so broke.

xD

We don't consider ourselves in a true relationship, but we aren't actively persuing other people at the moment.
Once we meet up, we'll decide whether to take the next step & go from there. :}
I hope that we do...it's been about five months now, & so...it's not a very long time, but it's enough time that I developed something for him.

He's in Cali, & I'm in Georgia.
So we're literally opposite.

LDRs are HARD.
:'/ It's so much different, & because I've never been in one [if you would call mine one, I guess], it takes a lot of learning on my part as well as his.

But I'm definitely willing to try.~

[sidewalkkittie]

Chibi_Ice_Angel

minsco

Right Now I'm In An LDR, And It's Really Hard. We Are a Year Apart, Him 15 I'm 14. My Friends Introduced Me To Him On Myspace. I HAve Never Met Him In Real Life.
:[ I Don't Think We Ever Will Either. I Guess There's Hope, But I'm Not Sure. Tomarrow Will Be Our 7 MOnth Aniversary, But I Woun't Be Able To Talk To Him. He's Never On The Computer Much And He Dosen't Have A Phone I Can Talk To Him with. So I Only Talk To Him Once Or Twice A MOnth, If even THat. We Went 3 Months Without Talking Once. I Know A Lot Of People Have LDRs That work And They Are Happy With Them, I Guess It just Takes time, But I Don't Think What I Have Right Now Is really Good. I Find It Really Hard To Get To Know someone You HAve Never Met Before. My Bestfriend Is In The Same Kind of Thing, But She's A Lot Closer To Her Bf And They Know Everything About Eachother. It Works For Her, But It's Not The Same For Me. I've been Really Close To Losing Him Before To, So I Would Like To Meet Him Before Something Happens And I Never Get The Chance.

Problems like yours often pop up in LDRs. However there are other ways to communicate. Some couples like to talk on the phone or communicate through webcams. If the computer is not your best friend texting and good old fashioned snail mail can be good as well. Until you can meet him try to keep contact as much as possible.

Agreed. The key truly is communication. Tony and I are in constant contact through IM's, text, e-mail, snail mail, and telephone calls. If we go too long without it, with both kind of tweak out haha.

[LynJah]

I know LDRs aren`t perfect - so a question comes to mind.

Have anyone of you guys ever had that feeling of insecure? I`ve always been the jealous type, & I get so worried if my guy talks to other girls. It`s the constant what ifs, you know?

I know I can trust my guy 100%, but those damn insecurities always make things so hard. How do you deal with those feelings?

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

minsco

Chibi_Ice_Angel

minsco

Right Now I'm In An LDR, And It's Really Hard. We Are a Year Apart, Him 15 I'm 14. My Friends Introduced Me To Him On Myspace. I HAve Never Met Him In Real Life.
:[ I Don't Think We Ever Will Either. I Guess There's Hope, But I'm Not Sure. Tomarrow Will Be Our 7 MOnth Aniversary, But I Woun't Be Able To Talk To Him. He's Never On The Computer Much And He Dosen't Have A Phone I Can Talk To Him with. So I Only Talk To Him Once Or Twice A MOnth, If even THat. We Went 3 Months Without Talking Once. I Know A Lot Of People Have LDRs That work And They Are Happy With Them, I Guess It just Takes time, But I Don't Think What I Have Right Now Is really Good. I Find It Really Hard To Get To Know someone You HAve Never Met Before. My Bestfriend Is In The Same Kind of Thing, But She's A Lot Closer To Her Bf And They Know Everything About Eachother. It Works For Her, But It's Not The Same For Me. I've been Really Close To Losing Him Before To, So I Would Like To Meet Him Before Something Happens And I Never Get The Chance.

Problems like yours often pop up in LDRs. However there are other ways to communicate. Some couples like to talk on the phone or communicate through webcams. If the computer is not your best friend texting and good old fashioned snail mail can be good as well. Until you can meet him try to keep contact as much as possible.

i Try, But The Only Way We Can Talk Is Gaia Or Aim, Which Is Ok When We Talk And All But I Wish I Could Here His Voice for once. he And His Friends Have Been In Bad relationships To Where They Aren't Very Trusting To Give Out THeir Phone Number.

Well after 7 monthes you should talk to him about his trust issues. Many guys have them and they are afraid to talk to people about them. Reassure him that you are there for him and don't pressure him into anything to quickly. Just let things take their course. Patience is important in any relationship but especially one where you don't see each other as often as you would like.

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

LynJah

I know LDRs aren`t perfect - so a question comes to mind.

Have anyone of you guys ever had that feeling of insecure? I`ve always been the jealous type, & I get so worried if my guy talks to other girls. It`s the constant what ifs, you know?

I know I can trust my guy 100%, but those damn insecurities always make things so hard. How do you deal with those feelings?

I know what you're feeling. I have had the same problems myself lots of times. Anyone who is far from the one that they love knows the emotion that comes up when you want to trust your significant other but that little nagging voice in the back of your head keeps popping up. Just let the what ifs go. You said you can trust him 100%. Just have faith in that, and if you ever need to talk we are all here to support you. heart

[minsco]

Chibi_Ice_Angel

minsco

Chibi_Ice_Angel

minsco

Right Now I'm In An LDR, And It's Really Hard. We Are a Year Apart, Him 15 I'm 14. My Friends Introduced Me To Him On Myspace. I HAve Never Met Him In Real Life.
:[ I Don't Think We Ever Will Either. I Guess There's Hope, But I'm Not Sure. Tomarrow Will Be Our 7 MOnth Aniversary, But I Woun't Be Able To Talk To Him. He's Never On The Computer Much And He Dosen't Have A Phone I Can Talk To Him with. So I Only Talk To Him Once Or Twice A MOnth, If even THat. We Went 3 Months Without Talking Once. I Know A Lot Of People Have LDRs That work And They Are Happy With Them, I Guess It just Takes time, But I Don't Think What I Have Right Now Is really Good. I Find It Really Hard To Get To Know someone You HAve Never Met Before. My Bestfriend Is In The Same Kind of Thing, But She's A Lot Closer To Her Bf And They Know Everything About Eachother. It Works For Her, But It's Not The Same For Me. I've been Really Close To Losing Him Before To, So I Would Like To Meet Him Before Something Happens And I Never Get The Chance.

Problems like yours often pop up in LDRs. However there are other ways to communicate. Some couples like to talk on the phone or communicate through webcams. If the computer is not your best friend texting and good old fashioned snail mail can be good as well. Until you can meet him try to keep contact as much as possible.

i Try, But The Only Way We Can Talk Is Gaia Or Aim, Which Is Ok When We Talk And All But I Wish I Could Here His Voice for once. he And His Friends Have Been In Bad relationships To Where They Aren't Very Trusting To Give Out THeir Phone Number.

Well after 7 monthes you should talk to him about his trust issues. Many guys have them and they are afraid to talk to people about them. Reassure him that you are there for him and don't pressure him into anything to quickly. Just let things take their course. Patience is important in any relationship but especially one where you don't see each other as often as you would like.

Yeah, I Guess Your Right, I'll Talk To Him About It next Time We Talk. Which From What I heard Will Be Sometime Next Month.

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

AcidicLemons

:] I'll share my story.

We're both 19, met him in the middle of last year while role playing. xD
Haha, we had been role playing for about...a few months, & then we would talk to each other out-of-character, & we got to know each other better.

We added each other's MySpaces & continued to talk from then, & the rest is pretty much history.
We're planning on a meeting date this year, but it's gonna be hard since we're both so broke.

xD

We don't consider ourselves in a true relationship, but we aren't actively persuing other people at the moment.
Once we meet up, we'll decide whether to take the next step & go from there. :}
I hope that we do...it's been about five months now, & so...it's not a very long time, but it's enough time that I developed something for him.

He's in Cali, & I'm in Georgia.
So we're literally opposite.

LDRs are HARD.
:'/ It's so much different, & because I've never been in one [if you would call mine one, I guess], it takes a lot of learning on my part as well as his.

But I'm definitely willing to try.~

And its that willingness to try that makes all the difference. In LDRs both sides have to take and give just like in any relationship, but sometimes even more. I hope everything works out for you.

[SinfulGuillotine]

I have a question for people in LDRs who do get the chance to see their partners in person from time to time.

My boyfriend doesn't live too terribly far away, so we get to see each other maybe once a month or once every other month on average, depending on our schedules. Usually only for a weekend at a time. And seeing him is great, of course, and I'm thankful that we live close enough for relatively frequent visits to be possible, but I often feel sort of pressured to do as much together as we possibly can, since we usually only have two or three days per visit to be together.

Does anyone else ever feel rushed or pressured to make the most out of visits as possible, and if so, how do you deal with it?

[Chibi_Ice_Angel]

sidewalkkittie

Now this is my kind of thread.

My boyfriend and I met online three years ago. We were friends and chatted casually, him being the creator of an RPing website and me having been promoted to a moderator. Last year, the staff decided that we should all meet IRL, specifically at the Penny Arcade Expo in Seattle. Meeting face to face was what did it. It was quite literally love at first sight. By the end of the weekend, we were both reeling from all the emotions and very confused. I had been seriously dating a woman for much of the time that he had known me, so I kind of caught him off guard. And then, as he was hugging me goodbye, he kissed me on the cheek.

And here we are, five months and two trips across the country later, madly in love.

I am 22 (well tomorrow I am haha) and he is 21 (turning 22 in April). I live in Connecticut and he lives in California, 2964 miles apart. I have tentative plans to move in May. smile

Thank you for sharing such a lovely story and for reading and giving advice to others. Your advice seems to really come from the heart. Thank you heart