Veive
(?)Community Member
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- Posted: Sat, 28 May 2005 03:25:56 +0000
I'm currently smitten with a guy who is doing a homestay in Japan for ten more months.
I happen to be in America.
So yeah, we're an ocean apart. We communicate regularly through email and IM, but of course I miss him terribly.
I told him I loved him before he left, but he made it clear (not in a mean way) that he just wasn't interested in high school-age relationships. I love being around him, so I was okay with being friends. We were and are very close, and sometimes we can communicate wordlessly, like we know what the other is thinking.
However, when he gets back, he's not going to be in high school anymore, although I'll still have a year to go.
My question is this.
When he gets back, is there an appropriate way to bring up the topic of being together?
I'd wait for a few months, of course, to make sure the love was still there and to get to know him again, but I have absolutely no idea how to broach the topic again.
I also have no idea whether it even should be broached.
We've got a very interesting relationship. We've been everything from partners-in-crime to 'siblings' to rumored bedmates, and gossip still abounds about the exact nature of our relationship. I'm one of his best friends, and he is mine. I couldn't really imagine, say, kissing him (although I'm sure it wouldn't be unpleasurable), but I could definitely imagine being with him for a long time. He's not someone I'd get tired of, and we both have mutual respect and trust for one another. We're much closer than friends, and his presence makes me happy and calm, something I greatly value because I have an anxiety disorder.
Also, he leaves for college a few months after he gets back, and his way to the ivy leagues is effectively guaranteed. With my GPA, there's no way I'd get in, so it's going to be long-distance at best, assuming he responds favorably.
Thoughts? Opinions? How would you talk to him about it? I've always been a fan of direct communication, but I also don't want to come off as overbearing.
I happen to be in America.
So yeah, we're an ocean apart. We communicate regularly through email and IM, but of course I miss him terribly.
I told him I loved him before he left, but he made it clear (not in a mean way) that he just wasn't interested in high school-age relationships. I love being around him, so I was okay with being friends. We were and are very close, and sometimes we can communicate wordlessly, like we know what the other is thinking.
However, when he gets back, he's not going to be in high school anymore, although I'll still have a year to go.
My question is this.
When he gets back, is there an appropriate way to bring up the topic of being together?
I'd wait for a few months, of course, to make sure the love was still there and to get to know him again, but I have absolutely no idea how to broach the topic again.
I also have no idea whether it even should be broached.
We've got a very interesting relationship. We've been everything from partners-in-crime to 'siblings' to rumored bedmates, and gossip still abounds about the exact nature of our relationship. I'm one of his best friends, and he is mine. I couldn't really imagine, say, kissing him (although I'm sure it wouldn't be unpleasurable), but I could definitely imagine being with him for a long time. He's not someone I'd get tired of, and we both have mutual respect and trust for one another. We're much closer than friends, and his presence makes me happy and calm, something I greatly value because I have an anxiety disorder.
Also, he leaves for college a few months after he gets back, and his way to the ivy leagues is effectively guaranteed. With my GPA, there's no way I'd get in, so it's going to be long-distance at best, assuming he responds favorably.
Thoughts? Opinions? How would you talk to him about it? I've always been a fan of direct communication, but I also don't want to come off as overbearing.
