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I think your reason is stupid. You have a child, this is not the time go out and about finding guys to date and be with. If you didnt think you had a lot of expereince, you should have don this BEFORE a baby. Now you have to own up to what you have done and the responsibly being a mother requires.

If you dont want to be with your boyfriend, dont be with him. But dont call it a break to lead him on and dont go jumping from one guy to the next. Your daughter is your priority, not some guy that said he is into you.
legnanellaf5
I think your reason is stupid. You have a child, this is not the time go out and about finding guys to date and be with. If you didnt think you had a lot of expereince, you should have don this BEFORE a baby. Now you have to own up to what you have done and the responsibly being a mother requires.

If you dont want to be with your boyfriend, dont be with him. But dont call it a break to lead him on and dont go jumping from one guy to the next. Your daughter is your priority, not some guy that said he is into you.

So because I have a daughter, I am automatically not allowed to go on dates? It's not like I am putting them before my child. My child will always come first but I don't think that that means that I am not allowed to go on dates once in a while.
Wow, a MOTHER that isn't committed to their baby's father. Society these days.
PLDivision
legnanellaf5
I think your reason is stupid. You have a child, this is not the time go out and about finding guys to date and be with. If you didnt think you had a lot of expereince, you should have don this BEFORE a baby. Now you have to own up to what you have done and the responsibly being a mother requires.

If you dont want to be with your boyfriend, dont be with him. But dont call it a break to lead him on and dont go jumping from one guy to the next. Your daughter is your priority, not some guy that said he is into you.

So because I have a daughter, I am automatically not allowed to go on dates? It's not like I am putting them before my child. My child will always come first but I don't think that that means that I am not allowed to go on dates once in a while.


Dating really is putting someone else above your child. Especially at that young of an age, you should not be taking a lot of time out of taking care of them to do other things. You are a mother. And it isnt just your mother that realizes that she has no free time, the whole point of motherhood is that you no longer are going to put yourself first but the child. Which means yes, not really getting to go out. Not really being able to date. Not being able to do what you want. That is what you signed up for by having a child/

Ignoring the cluster ******** leaving your boyfriend will be because you will have to sort the livign stuff out, it is extremely irresponsible to think about another guy when you should be ALL about the child. She isnt even a year old, she needs you in the most basic way. And how would you be able to go on dates anyways? You would have to give your child to someone else for that period of time, which is literally putting that date above taking care of a kid.
BBQDanTheMan
Wow, a MOTHER that isn't committed to their baby's father. Society these days.

Considering he doesn't take care of his owner daughter as much as he should, yes.
Does he change her? Nope.
Feed her? Nope.
He'd rather play his Call of Duty.

Bloodsucker

You have a baby.
All those romantic/sexual experiences you believe you didn't get enough of is going to be put on halt for a little while. If a chance arises though, I don't see why you shouldn't take it. Life isn't going to stop just because a baby is in your life, but it isn't all about you anymore, which I'm sure you realize.
Baby is first priority.

Although I do believe if the baby's father is doing nothing but playing video games, and if you tried to communicate about him not doing chores or being a father, you have every right to leave him. From what I'm getting from OP is that he is just a nuisance. Staying in an unhealthy relationship won't do you any good.

Living situations might get more complicated, but if he is living with you, it won't be as bad. Now if you are living with him, things are going to be tough. Especially if you two are married but I don't see you mentioning that.
PLDivision
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"He can support me, so I rather date the other guy."

If you want to date someone else, go ahead. However, I tend to lean towards encouraging you not to date, but to be a mother to your daughter while working towards being able to independently support yourself. Doing that properly means you don't have time for serious dating.
Your bf sounds like s**t. He's too lazy to get a job because he rather play video games all day. You can do better. Just because you are a mom now doesn't mean your personal life is at an end. I'm a single mom. Its difficult dating while being a parent but not impossible, and its a lot easier when your child is that young since they sleep so much. I only go on dates when my daughter is asleep or is going to bed soon so we still get the majority of our time together and my parents have no problem watching her for me since it is so rare. You shouldn't feel guilty for wanting to try things out with this new guy or feel like it makes you a crappy mother. Just work around your child's schedule.

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PLDivision
BBQDanTheMan
Wow, a MOTHER that isn't committed to their baby's father. Society these days.

Considering he doesn't take care of his owner daughter as much as he should, yes.
Does he change her? Nope.
Feed her? Nope.
He'd rather play his Call of Duty.

And this is why I think not dating him is actually an excellent call. He's not a responsible partner, he is not working on or interested in becoming a responsible partner, and his sarcasm has passed the point of being funny and gone right into making you feel undermined. He's no prize, and you don't want to spend the rest of your life parenting him along with your child. You should feel free to find a real, actual adult who will treat you with respect, hold his own life together, and help you with daily responsibilities. Go, be free, and good luck.

Enthusiast

PLDivision
I have a five month old daughter and I am currently dating the father, he is living with me.
I told him last night I wanted a break, stated the reasons and he understood.
I want this break because although I love my boyfriend, I feel that I haven't had much experience on the dating scene.
I've only dated three people.

When I was pregnant, my boyfriend left me and got with another girl.
During that time, I eventually liked someone, let's call him J and he is my sisters boyfriends best friend.
However, he was dating my sisters best friend but they broke up after a few weeks.
Months later, leading up to a few days ago, I come to find out a few days ago that he is into me.

While I want to explore around more because I feel like I will just end up like my mother. (getting pregnant young, feeling this same feeling then eventually just cheating on her husband)
My boyfriend understands and said it's okay but I don't want to just drop my boyfriend who lives with me just because I feel this way.

What drives me away sometimes is that my boyfriend doesn't put enough effort into getting a job, a license or finish school. He wants to but his mind gets so overrun by Call of Duty that he just forgets. I try to get him back on track sometimes. He has money but it's not like it'll last long with no job. My boyfriend is a sweetheart but his sarcasm is so overpowering that in the end it just makes me feel worthless.

While this other guy has his head on straight with a nursing degree (i also plan to pursue nursing), a job, a car and actually is going somewhere in life... he comes off as nicer, thankfully less sarcasm.


Number 1: Do not listen to BBQDanTheMan.

Also, break up with your boyfriend. Find yourself a man who actually cares about you and your daughter enough to show it through action. Yeah, I get that your current boyfriend is your child's biological father, but the way he's behaving to you and your child, he's no different than a sperm donor.

If you do leave your childish boyfriend and start dating once your daughter is old enough to be left with a babysitter you trust, just remember to manage your time responsibly and always make your daughter top priority; because no man is greater than your child.

Spoopy Kitten

You cant take a break with your boyfriend just to date someone else. Thats breaking up, not a 'break'. Do not keep the father as plan B. Let him know he can date around too, and make sure he does. If you have regrets now, you will later as well. Find a guy who respects you and you respect as well

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BBQDanTheMan
Wow, a MOTHER that isn't committed to their baby's father. Society these days.


She is a mother who is dedicated to her child, not dedicated to go have sex with guys which is good. And you expect less of her? Get away from the computer screen and do something with your life.

@OP: Dump him. He's too busy doing whatever the heck he wants rather than help care for you and the baby. He won't even get up off his butt to help support the family. He may be the biological father of the child, but right now he really IS acting like one...a child I mean.

Being a single parent is going to be hard, but I believe---no, I KNOW you can do it. You're a strong lady with a strong heart and you can totally conquer anything with that strong heart of yours. biggrin yeaaah go girl! ^ ^

Just continue raising your daughter. Once she is old enough, you can leave her with a baby-sitter (be sure to do a background check on these baby-sitters) and you can go get a boyfriend or something like that. biggrin

The daughter is the one that takes it all as #1 in your list of priorities, and no man in this life will ever qualify well enough to take that spot. smile

Lonely Wolf

PLDivision
I have a five month old daughter and I am currently dating the father, he is living with me.
I told him last night I wanted a break, stated the reasons and he understood.
I want this break because although I love my boyfriend, I feel that I haven't had much experience on the dating scene.
I've only dated three people.

When I was pregnant, my boyfriend left me and got with another girl.
During that time, I eventually liked someone, let's call him J and he is my sisters boyfriends best friend.
However, he was dating my sisters best friend but they broke up after a few weeks.
Months later, leading up to a few days ago, I come to find out a few days ago that he is into me.

While I want to explore around more because I feel like I will just end up like my mother. (getting pregnant young, feeling this same feeling then eventually just cheating on her husband)
My boyfriend understands and said it's okay but I don't want to just drop my boyfriend who lives with me just because I feel this way.

What drives me away sometimes is that my boyfriend doesn't put enough effort into getting a job, a license or finish school. He wants to but his mind gets so overrun by Call of Duty that he just forgets. I try to get him back on track sometimes. He has money but it's not like it'll last long with no job. My boyfriend is a sweetheart but his sarcasm is so overpowering that in the end it just makes me feel worthless.

While this other guy has his head on straight with a nursing degree (i also plan to pursue nursing), a job, a car and actually is going somewhere in life... he comes off as nicer, thankfully less sarcasm.

Well it sounds like you want to explore other options while keeping your boyfriend by your side. I know exactly how you feel, but maybe you should just break up with you boyfriend but still keep the friendship aspect of the relationship that you have with him in good condition for the sake of your child. If your boyfriend says that's it's alright for you to see other people, maybe he doesn't hold the same type of opinions/emotions that you do about the relationship because if he did, he'd more than likely be trying to fix whatever problems that you two have, but seeing as how he isn't trying, he's probably feeling the same way as you to an extent. I thin kin the end, it'd just be best for you to break off the relationship as it is now and just be good friends.

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              I think you should take care of your infant daughter before dating.
              Wait until she's a little older before dating seriously (i.e. preschool, kindergarten, etc).
              She should be your #1 priority right now. User Image

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