What do you think about over protective parents?

[Xeno Incognito]

Sounds like emotional abuse to me. :/

I'd talk with a counselor about this.

[xXMidniteDawnXx]

LUZnaturally

Talk to a councellor about this. Not on some anime forum o.o.

ANYWAYS
I went through something like that for about 13 years of my life. I'm 19 now but the fact that I have ...some issues (rather not say) came from what my father did to me. He'd read my diary, verbally abuse me in the WORST way, spy on me, listen into my phone conversations, not allow me to even socialize after school; I'd have to come straight from school, no objections. s**t like that. He's been gone now for nearly 3 years but I'm still not okay. You're at an impressionable age, even as a teenager. Regardless if you have strong willpower or whatever, it will catch up to you. People would say I was super strong and what not but after a year from when he left, I started breaking down.

If it's truely bothering you, contact your mother without him knowing, especially if you think he'd interfere somehow. You have a right to talk to her. To let her know how you feel about this. But if you think you can still live with him, with all that over-protective-ness, then go ahead. Just my two cents.

i don't have the right, some stupid judge made it to where my dad has to read it first

[Overexposure]

xXMidniteDawnXx

My dad is really over protective and it's really starting to get on my nerves. I never used to notice till now, because I'm getting older, and dad thinks it's because of my new school. He threatens to send me to a catholic school, he won't let me put my picture up on the internet, I can't write in my diary without him peering over my shoulder. He's also mean, telling my I'm a brat, mean, and cruel. I don't know how to deal with this. When ever I tell him he say "Oh, no I'm not, I'm being a good dad." same gos for when I tell him he's mean, he says "No, I'll have to tell you, I'm a very nice and caring person." I want to tell him I want to live with my mom (who I haven't seen scene I was 8 or so) but then he'll talk about her, and I don't wanna her him talk in his annoying voice about how everything with my mom is none of his fault when it is. What are your thoughts on this? Do you have an over protective or mean parent? If so, please tell us about it.

Worst place to ever seek sound advice about parenting.

You're getting older and beginning to define who you are. So he seems overprotective of you.

All parents threaten catholic/military school.

Do no put your picture on the internet. Do not put any information about yourself on the internet. Do not invite a rapist into your home. Do not tease bears. Do not kick a porcupine. See where I'm going?

Don't write in your diary when your Dad is around? Obviously he's curious, he's responsible for you.

You do sound like a brat, but that is his fault if you are. Deal with it like all of us do when' we're insulted. (Tip: Don't throw a tantrum)

If you want to live with your Mom, tell HER that. Since your parents are separated, it was her decision for you to stay with him. No court gives fathers custody unless your mother is a felon and a crack addict. Even then, it's pretty likely she can get it if her lawyer can prove that your dad jaywalked once.

Your Dad sounds like an alright guy, trying to raise his kid to turn out alright too.

Life Issues might be more sympathetic to you.

[resinstained]

xXMidniteDawnXx

LUZnaturally

Talk to a councellor about this. Not on some anime forum o.o.

ANYWAYS
I went through something like that for about 13 years of my life. I'm 19 now but the fact that I have ...some issues (rather not say) came from what my father did to me. He'd read my diary, verbally abuse me in the WORST way, spy on me, listen into my phone conversations, not allow me to even socialize after school; I'd have to come straight from school, no objections. s**t like that. He's been gone now for nearly 3 years but I'm still not okay. You're at an impressionable age, even as a teenager. Regardless if you have strong willpower or whatever, it will catch up to you. People would say I was super strong and what not but after a year from when he left, I started breaking down.

If it's truely bothering you, contact your mother without him knowing, especially if you think he'd interfere somehow. You have a right to talk to her. To let her know how you feel about this. But if you think you can still live with him, with all that over-protective-ness, then go ahead. Just my two cents.

i don't have the right, some stupid judge made it to where my dad has to read it first

I'd say go see the school councellor and talk to them instead. They can help you in a more direct manner.

[xXMidniteDawnXx]

Xeno Incognito

Sounds like emotional abuse to me. :/

I'd talk with a counselor about this.

i really don't like to bring them into stuff like this

[resinstained]

xXMidniteDawnXx

Xeno Incognito

Sounds like emotional abuse to me. :/

I'd talk with a counselor about this.

i really don't like to bring them into stuff like this

You may feel reluctant to seek outside help but if it truely is bothering you, then you really should talk to a councellor. I mean, you made this topic because it's obviously hurting you and you wanted opinions on what to do. That's what a councellors job is though. To tell you your options etc and help you overall.

[Blakaize]

xXMidniteDawnXx

My dad is really over protective

Alright

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and it's really starting to get on my nerves.

So?

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I never used to notice till now,

Obviously, then, it wasn't that big of a deal. You're probably just hitting puberty.

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because I'm getting older,

Knew it

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and dad thinks it's because of my new school.

How does he make that connection?

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He threatens to send me to a catholic school,

There are some great CS's out there, lots of which that offer excellent scholarship oppertunities for college.

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he won't let me put my picture up on the internet,

That's fully within his power as a parent. If you're young, there isn't much a reason for your picture to be on there. There are perverts on the internet, you know. It's not an urban legend. That's not over protective, that's common sense.

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I can't write in my diary without him peering over my shoulder.

Then find a new place to write. A closet, the basement, close your bedroom door, the library . ..

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He's also mean,

Subjective and requires evidence to back up claim. What may be 'mean' to you, may be common sense to the rest of the world.

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telling my I'm a brat,

You're beginning to sound like one.

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mean, and cruel. I don't know how to deal with this.

The ED is not your hug-box, we can't help you with life problems. That's what life style discussion is for.

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When ever I tell him he say "Oh, no I'm not, I'm being a good dad."

He sounds like he is . . .

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same gos for when I tell him he's mean, he says "No, I'll have to tell you, I'm a very nice and caring person."

Okay, now I think you're exaggerating. I've never heard anyone say in response to the remark "you are mean" with "i am a nice caring person." The logical response would be "No, I'm not."

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I want to tell him I want to live with my mom (who I haven't seen scene I was 8 or so) but then he'll talk about her . . ..

LIFE STYLE DISCUSSION! GO THERE!

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What are your thoughts on this?

He sounds like a decent single parent. Obviously, if custody was not awarded to your mother, he must have been the courts' best bet in having you raised in a good house hold. neutral

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Do you have an over protective or mean parent? If so, please tell us about it.

No. And by 'mean,' I'd certaintly hope you imply 'abusive, neglectful, substandard etc' and not 'doesn't let me do what i want, therefore, he is mean'
neutral

[Blakaize]

Xeno Incognito

Sounds like emotional abuse to me. :/

I'd talk with a counselor about this.

How do you figure?
I agree him talking about her mother negatively is rather assholish of him, but such is the nature of a divorcee struggling to parent on his own.
Simply being over protective is not emotional abuse

[Xeno Incognito]

Blakaize

Xeno Incognito

Sounds like emotional abuse to me. :/

I'd talk with a counselor about this.

How do you figure?
I agree him talking about her mother negatively is rather assholish of him, but such is the nature of a divorcee struggling to parent on his own.
Simply being over protective is not emotional abuse

No, I agree with most of his parenting. She shouldn't be posting her picture on the internet. The diary thing is sketchy but not exactly abusive. However, telling her she's a brat and mean and cruel is demeaning and abusive. Even worse, he's denying her the right to contact her own mother, which is a difficult situation for a divorcee's child.

[Blakaize]

Xeno Incognito

Blakaize

Xeno Incognito

Sounds like emotional abuse to me. :/

I'd talk with a counselor about this.

How do you figure?
I agree him talking about her mother negatively is rather assholish of him, but such is the nature of a divorcee struggling to parent on his own.
Simply being over protective is not emotional abuse

No, I agree with most of his parenting. She shouldn't be posting her picture on the internet. The diary thing is sketchy but not exactly abusive. However, telling her she's a brat and mean and cruel is demeaning and abusive. Even worse, he's denying her the right to contact her own mother, which is a difficult situation for a divorcee's child.

Remember that this is subjective. We don't know if she's paraphrasing or what condition her mother is in.
Perhaps {and my parents have told me this once or twice} he told her she was "acting bratty." Have you ever been in a bad mood and snapped on someone, even once, and someone told you where acting a certain way?
I honestly don't believe he called her mean or cruel, unless she gave him a reason to. But then, I don't really know the situation.
Consider this: the norm of the judicial system, ever changing as it is, usually selects the mother of a child to be the primary caregiver when a custody debate is underway. However, in this case, it is awarded to the father. In in today's liberal systems, this is rare, unless the mother is in dire straits.
I agree, she should have contact, but, again, I don't know the entire sitatution.

[ZechsK]

xXMidniteDawnXx

My dad is really over protective and it's really starting to get on my nerves. I never used to notice till now, because I'm getting older, and dad thinks it's because of my new school. He threatens to send me to a catholic school, he won't let me put my picture up on the internet, I can't write in my diary without him peering over my shoulder. He's also mean, telling my I'm a brat, mean, and cruel. I don't know how to deal with this. When ever I tell him he say "Oh, no I'm not, I'm being a good dad." same gos for when I tell him he's mean, he says "No, I'll have to tell you, I'm a very nice and caring person." I want to tell him I want to live with my mom (who I haven't seen scene I was 8 or so) but then he'll talk about her, and I don't wanna her him talk in his annoying voice about how everything with my mom is none of his fault when it is. What are your thoughts on this? Do you have an over protective or mean parent? If so, please tell us about it.

Am I the only mature person left on ED? How can you all judge something by hearing only one side? Because angsty teens embellishing ISN'T the norm amirite?

1- How old are you?
2- Has there ever been an incident in which he felt you were at risk of harm according to what he defines as harm?
3- What is the crime like in your area?
4- Has your behavour changed at all since you've been going to this new school? If so then how?
5- Has your behaviour changed since you're getting older? If so then how?
6- What are you doing when he calls you a brat and mean and cruel? He just jumps out from behind a doorway calls you names and runs off? i.e. why does he feel justified in calling you those things?
7- You ended up in custody with your father, that is unusual, even more so since you're female. Why did the court think he was the better parent? Or, why did she leave you with him, what are her negatives? Are you sure living with your mother is best for you in the long run?


Parents generally act the way your father is acting when children start to do things they don't approve of. What aren't you telling us? if your only complaint is that he doesn't let you put your picture up online then thats rather ... petty. What else is he prohibiting you from doing that you think he shouldn't which makes him overprotective? And don't give us the minor stuff, give us the major things.

[Yami no Hitokiri]

Your dad sounds like a real d**k, but not really abusive. People are too easy with that word nowadays.

If you don't want him reading your diary, only write in it in your room and keep it hidden in a place he wouldn't think of.

If you really want to contact your mom without him knowing, find a pay phone and call her form there. Don't use a cell phone, as the numbers you call show up on the bill.

[SosukeSuigetsu]

ZechsK

xXMidniteDawnXx

My dad is really over protective and it's really starting to get on my nerves. I never used to notice till now, because I'm getting older, and dad thinks it's because of my new school. He threatens to send me to a catholic school, he won't let me put my picture up on the internet, I can't write in my diary without him peering over my shoulder. He's also mean, telling my I'm a brat, mean, and cruel. I don't know how to deal with this. When ever I tell him he say "Oh, no I'm not, I'm being a good dad." same gos for when I tell him he's mean, he says "No, I'll have to tell you, I'm a very nice and caring person." I want to tell him I want to live with my mom (who I haven't seen scene I was 8 or so) but then he'll talk about her, and I don't wanna her him talk in his annoying voice about how everything with my mom is none of his fault when it is. What are your thoughts on this? Do you have an over protective or mean parent? If so, please tell us about it.

Am I the only mature person left on ED? How can you all judge something by hearing only one side? Because angsty teens embellishing ISN'T the norm amirite?

1- How old are you?
2- Has there ever been an incident in which he felt you were at risk of harm according to what he defines as harm?
3- What is the crime like in your area?
4- Has your behavour changed at all since you've been going to this new school? If so then how?
5- Has your behaviour changed since you're getting older? If so then how?
6- What are you doing when he calls you a brat and mean and cruel? He just jumps out from behind a doorway calls you names and runs off? i.e. why does he feel justified in calling you those things?
7- You ended up in custody with your father, that is unusual, even more so since you're female. Why did the court think he was the better parent? Or, why did she leave you with him, what are her negatives? Are you sure living with your mother is best for you in the long run?


Parents generally act the way your father is acting when children start to do things they don't approve of. What aren't you telling us? if your only complaint is that he doesn't let you put your picture up online then thats rather ... petty. What else is he prohibiting you from doing that you think he shouldn't which makes him overprotective? And don't give us the minor stuff, give us the major things.

See my post. 4laugh