Sikizu
(?)Community Member
Anxious Lunatic
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- Posted: Mon, 14 Apr 2014 20:56:15 +0000
Well last night I had, what I believe to be, a severe dissociative episode. I think an altered state of consciousness showed up, too. If not, I don't know what to call it. But this got me thinking.
Have you ever had a mental breakdown/episode/general mental shenanigans?
What was the trigger, if it's not too personal?
What were you feeling like during the episode?
Do you have any mental illnesses that you think could have contributed to it?
If you're game, what do you think happened to me? (see spoiler)
Have you ever had a mental breakdown/episode/general mental shenanigans?
What was the trigger, if it's not too personal?
What were you feeling like during the episode?
Do you have any mental illnesses that you think could have contributed to it?
If you're game, what do you think happened to me? (see spoiler)
This is a section of text I sent my friend during my episode:
The email my friend sent me was completely re-assuring, telling me that I could fight off the stress and anxiety that I was feeling, and that she believed in me, and that I should try to calm down and get my head together. That was an hour after my episode started. The entire thing lasted for at least three hours.
It's also worth mentioning that I have a severe phobia of sharks, so that last bit honestly showed how messed up in the head I was. I honestly felt like I was evil, and I was depersonalizing all over the place. I never got so bad that it felt like someone else, like a different personality altogether, took over, but I could swear that I literally was feeling my personality warping. Everything was funny, no matter how dire, disgusting, normal, painful, funny, or anything else, it was. I never got to word salad, thankfully. It really would have been scary then.
I researched a bit into what it could be, but I only looked at dissociative things.
Quote:
pfffftaaahahahahahahahhaahahahaaa
is this waht being gribmdarks is like? id dunno kcassie tried explaining it to me but i wasn't really paying all that much attentions so i dudnnnnoooo
i don't know ho wbut now i think ithsi hthhhhhhno this might be disassosociiatevibevino diassociative i dunno tbut what ever it is it's wrierd and i dunno and i'm sorry but your emeail wias funny and i have a fevideo that i made just now and i'll uploadi tiit maybe even to tumblr but i'll try tuyoutube but eh who kneows and ehehehehehehehahahahahahahahahahahahah the crap even i smy btypting right now what the crap even is this
seriously tho tuhghh thatnk you but ei dn'ont' even know what 's ahppening to bmme right now so fffppffftttaaaaahahaahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahaaaahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
ai dion't know it's kinda sacary but not really i ts not like i'm tripping but i 'm comletely dizzy and nknow what aknow what
an hour ago? i look ed up o n gogooogle images pictures of s"ashark attack" and id din't even flinch i mean if felt fear swelling up but it didn't rsurface like so many o fdem schakries abut i mean there awas a corpse of a guy shwwhhoo literally lost tobboth eararaarms and this pelvis and all of that attt tand he was in sand in nanaand in a wetsuit and it was actually real wlike blood and gustts and everything and i dunno it wasn't ufnnny then but it is now and wwwhhhaaaatttt id on't even know and boy anm ai iii gonna reggret that in the mornng
is this waht being gribmdarks is like? id dunno kcassie tried explaining it to me but i wasn't really paying all that much attentions so i dudnnnnoooo
i don't know ho wbut now i think ithsi hthhhhhhno this might be disassosociiatevibevino diassociative i dunno tbut what ever it is it's wrierd and i dunno and i'm sorry but your emeail wias funny and i have a fevideo that i made just now and i'll uploadi tiit maybe even to tumblr but i'll try tuyoutube but eh who kneows and ehehehehehehehahahahahahahahahahahahah the crap even i smy btypting right now what the crap even is this
seriously tho tuhghh thatnk you but ei dn'ont' even know what 's ahppening to bmme right now so fffppffftttaaaaahahaahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahaaaahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
ai dion't know it's kinda sacary but not really i ts not like i'm tripping but i 'm comletely dizzy and nknow what aknow what
an hour ago? i look ed up o n gogooogle images pictures of s"ashark attack" and id din't even flinch i mean if felt fear swelling up but it didn't rsurface like so many o fdem schakries abut i mean there awas a corpse of a guy shwwhhoo literally lost tobboth eararaarms and this pelvis and all of that attt tand he was in sand in nanaand in a wetsuit and it was actually real wlike blood and gustts and everything and i dunno it wasn't ufnnny then but it is now and wwwhhhaaaatttt id on't even know and boy anm ai iii gonna reggret that in the mornng
The email my friend sent me was completely re-assuring, telling me that I could fight off the stress and anxiety that I was feeling, and that she believed in me, and that I should try to calm down and get my head together. That was an hour after my episode started. The entire thing lasted for at least three hours.
It's also worth mentioning that I have a severe phobia of sharks, so that last bit honestly showed how messed up in the head I was. I honestly felt like I was evil, and I was depersonalizing all over the place. I never got so bad that it felt like someone else, like a different personality altogether, took over, but I could swear that I literally was feeling my personality warping. Everything was funny, no matter how dire, disgusting, normal, painful, funny, or anything else, it was. I never got to word salad, thankfully. It really would have been scary then.
I researched a bit into what it could be, but I only looked at dissociative things.