Stalker Ex Boyfriend... o__o

[OMG Whoops]

klebold

OMG Whoops

Melly Kwistmass

OMG Whoops

Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

Then I guess this isn't bothering you as much as you put across. Have fun letting someone with possible mental issues pursue you without your knowledge.

Well obviously it is bothering me, My ex is stalking me and not letting me live my life. I've had his bullsh*t for almost 2 years now and I'm growing very tired of it, the controlling, the mind f*cking the using me just for sex and weed when he wants... He's the one who tells me he doesn't want anything more to do with me then decided's to become a stalker, i know he's obviously got mental issues otherwise these 2 years of our relationship would have got a lot smoother and he wouldn't have f*cked my head up in the mean time.. I just need to see if he's serious about what he's saying or not before i can really do anything as nothing has really happend yet, just 1 phone call about a bike outside my house last night,...

At first I was going to recommend Court too, as a former psychotic stalker myself, it impacted me enough to cause me to re-think my life, got slammed with a restraining order and $162 fine, but I had no idea you were a 15 year old pot-head who screws around, the court would never smile upon you even if you tried, you deserve whatever stalking you get, because you willingly chose to be a tool for him. He didn't use you for sex and weed, you let him use you for sex and weed, you had the option to avoid all of that, and now you're learning about the consequences of letting the wrong people in. Him and I are totally different, I've never made bad decisions knowingly, only accidents, never touched drugs or alcohol, but with a some mouse clicks I can find anyone I want whenever I want within the hour, but I don't, why does he? There's got to be something else that he's looking for.

I can safely say if you've gone on my profile i haven't updated it in years, Im now 18 no longer 15 and I'm not a pot head;- he was. And i never whiling chose to be a tool, who would? I loved him enough to just look past that and think "he does love me" ... ever heard of manipulation? And i can safely say i've never made bad decisions purposely, i had no idea at the time what was going on, it's called a controlling and abusive relationship that i desperately wanted to hang on to cos he made me fee; like i had nobody else in the world.
So if you're saying that me being strong enough to get out of that, means i deserve to be stalked, then i think thats a bit messed up.

[klebold]

OMG Whoops

klebold

OMG Whoops

Melly Kwistmass

OMG Whoops

Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

Then I guess this isn't bothering you as much as you put across. Have fun letting someone with possible mental issues pursue you without your knowledge.

Well obviously it is bothering me, My ex is stalking me and not letting me live my life. I've had his bullsh*t for almost 2 years now and I'm growing very tired of it, the controlling, the mind f*cking the using me just for sex and weed when he wants... He's the one who tells me he doesn't want anything more to do with me then decided's to become a stalker, i know he's obviously got mental issues otherwise these 2 years of our relationship would have got a lot smoother and he wouldn't have f*cked my head up in the mean time.. I just need to see if he's serious about what he's saying or not before i can really do anything as nothing has really happend yet, just 1 phone call about a bike outside my house last night,...

At first I was going to recommend Court too, as a former psychotic stalker myself, it impacted me enough to cause me to re-think my life, got slammed with a restraining order and $162 fine, but I had no idea you were a 15 year old pot-head who screws around, the court would never smile upon you even if you tried, you deserve whatever stalking you get, because you willingly chose to be a tool for him. He didn't use you for sex and weed, you let him use you for sex and weed, you had the option to avoid all of that, and now you're learning about the consequences of letting the wrong people in. Him and I are totally different, I've never made bad decisions knowingly, only accidents, never touched drugs or alcohol, but with a some mouse clicks I can find anyone I want whenever I want within the hour, but I don't, why does he? There's got to be something else that he's looking for.

I can safely say if you've gone on my profile i haven't updated it in years, Im now 18 no longer 15 and I'm not a pot head;- he was. And i never whiling chose to be a tool, who would? I loved him enough to just look past that and think "he does love me" ... ever heard of manipulation? And i can safely say i've never made bad decisions purposely, i had no idea at the time what was going on, it's called a controlling and abusive relationship that i desperately wanted to hang on to cos he made me fee; like i had nobody else in the world.
So if you're saying that me being strong enough to get out of that, means i deserve to be stalked, then i think thats a bit messed up.

You can't be stalked when you're compelled to keep him in your life like you said earlier. You WANT his attention. You're enabling him.

[OMG Whoops]

Ni-Ni-kun

OMG Whoops

Melly Kwistmass

OMG Whoops

Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

Then I guess this isn't bothering you as much as you put across. Have fun letting someone with possible mental issues pursue you without your knowledge.

Well obviously it is bothering me, My ex is stalking me and not letting me live my life. I've had his bullsh*t for almost 2 years now and I'm growing very tired of it, the controlling, the mind f*cking the using me just for sex and weed when he wants... He's the one who tells me he doesn't want anything more to do with me then decided's to become a stalker, i know he's obviously got mental issues otherwise these 2 years of our relationship would have got a lot smoother and he wouldn't have f*cked my head up in the mean time.. I just need to see if he's serious about what he's saying or not before i can really do anything as nothing has really happend yet, just 1 phone call about a bike outside my house last night,...

See all of the above is enough proof. That he's serious. If he's used you before. That is proof enough. I know you don't like 'hassles' but I think enough is enough. Nopes I think you think is enough is enough. I thought he only did this twice provided the answer you've given. But whether you broke up or are together this guy has obviously been serious at manipulating your mind. Don't let your mind play tricks on you now. You don't need more proof, you've seen enough. If he makes another move, document it, use it if you need. Whether it's a talk between mothers or actual legal stuff. Don't be waiting for a third or fourth move.

Thank you.. This has been a seriously messed up relationship, he even admitted on the phone tome yesterday that he's messed with my mind on purpose 'cos its been fun.. how i wish i could've recorded that :/ and i have had enough, i thought yesterday it was all over as he said it was but obviously i was wrong... that phone call this morning surprised me and shook me a little... and yeah when something else happens.. i will document it, and a talk between mothers sounds best at the moment as nothing is too... extreme at the moment... But i wont wait for a third of fourth.. too risky... thank you again smile

[Sinivar]

OMG Whoops

Sinivar

I think what they mean is that if you aren't willing to take legal measures because it's "too much of a hassle" then it must not be that big of a problem if you aren't willing to take the steps to end it.

If it's a serious issue, you need to treat it like one. And that means involving the law sometimes. Even if it does seem extreme, sometimes it's a hassle you -need- to be willing to go through.

I'll tell you now, people with an "If I can't have you, nobody can" mentality can be extremely dangerous. Heck, one gal my mother worked with left her boyfriend who had that same kinda mindset. He met her as she was going to work and shot her.

You need to be committed to doing -whatever- it takes to make him back off. Even if it doesn't come down to that, you need to be willing to take extreme measures to protect yourself. Dismissing the legal defences you have because it might be a hassle is a very bad idea and makes people think you don't take the situation seriously.

Oh wow :/ I don't think he'd ever do something quite that extreme... But then again i could be wrong.. I just dont have anything to put against him at the moment, no evidence or anything, im not even sure where to start tbh, im hoping he'll back off slowly but if it becomes too much then i'll obviously have to take action.. I've let my mum know and my sisters, but its only been this once so far this time he's 'watched my house' so just hoping it wont happen again...

You never want to underestimate someone who is violating your privacy. From what you've said, he's had a violent past, and desperation to make you come back to him on his terms might drive him to do things that go over the edge. He also might not be the type to hurt you, but the fact that he's willing to try to control you by watching you like that is still abusive.

And no matter what that other guy says, you do NOT deserve to be stalked by your ex just because he used you. Nobody has the right to do that to another person and nothing justifies it. No matter how sad or tragic his life experiences have been, you have the right to live your life without him watching you and questioning you should he ever think another male is in your company. You don't always need proof though. If you go to them and explain the situation, tell them of his violent background and the issue that he contacted you over the bike and that you feel he might be a threat to you, they might be able to issue a restraining order as is. And if not, they can at least give you the details on how to protect yourself just in case.

One thing I will tell you though, to me, it would be a very bad idea to consider going back to him. No matter whether you love him or miss him, he sounds dangerous and he seriously might need to seek counselling and get help before he gets into any relationships. And if you willingly go back to him, things won't improve. He will keep abusing you and controlling you. Think about going back to him if he's able to get himself under control. Because going back now is like willingly asking for a life of mental abuse and being controlled.

[OMG Whoops]

klebold

OMG Whoops

klebold

OMG Whoops

Melly Kwistmass

OMG Whoops

Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

Then I guess this isn't bothering you as much as you put across. Have fun letting someone with possible mental issues pursue you without your knowledge.

Well obviously it is bothering me, My ex is stalking me and not letting me live my life. I've had his bullsh*t for almost 2 years now and I'm growing very tired of it, the controlling, the mind f*cking the using me just for sex and weed when he wants... He's the one who tells me he doesn't want anything more to do with me then decided's to become a stalker, i know he's obviously got mental issues otherwise these 2 years of our relationship would have got a lot smoother and he wouldn't have f*cked my head up in the mean time.. I just need to see if he's serious about what he's saying or not before i can really do anything as nothing has really happend yet, just 1 phone call about a bike outside my house last night,...

At first I was going to recommend Court too, as a former psychotic stalker myself, it impacted me enough to cause me to re-think my life, got slammed with a restraining order and $162 fine, but I had no idea you were a 15 year old pot-head who screws around, the court would never smile upon you even if you tried, you deserve whatever stalking you get, because you willingly chose to be a tool for him. He didn't use you for sex and weed, you let him use you for sex and weed, you had the option to avoid all of that, and now you're learning about the consequences of letting the wrong people in. Him and I are totally different, I've never made bad decisions knowingly, only accidents, never touched drugs or alcohol, but with a some mouse clicks I can find anyone I want whenever I want within the hour, but I don't, why does he? There's got to be something else that he's looking for.

I can safely say if you've gone on my profile i haven't updated it in years, Im now 18 no longer 15 and I'm not a pot head;- he was. And i never whiling chose to be a tool, who would? I loved him enough to just look past that and think "he does love me" ... ever heard of manipulation? And i can safely say i've never made bad decisions purposely, i had no idea at the time what was going on, it's called a controlling and abusive relationship that i desperately wanted to hang on to cos he made me fee; like i had nobody else in the world.
So if you're saying that me being strong enough to get out of that, means i deserve to be stalked, then i think thats a bit messed up.

You can't be stalked when you're compelled to keep him in your life like you said earlier. You WANT his attention. You're enabling him.

Yes I'm saying I DID want his attention, i used to crave for it, but after our argument yesterday, he told me he wanted nothing more i accept it and wished him to have a good life.. i expected to never hear from him again.. but yet he calls me this morning... so i never asked for any of that attention he is now giving me.

[OMG Whoops]

Sinivar

OMG Whoops

Sinivar

I think what they mean is that if you aren't willing to take legal measures because it's "too much of a hassle" then it must not be that big of a problem if you aren't willing to take the steps to end it.

If it's a serious issue, you need to treat it like one. And that means involving the law sometimes. Even if it does seem extreme, sometimes it's a hassle you -need- to be willing to go through.

I'll tell you now, people with an "If I can't have you, nobody can" mentality can be extremely dangerous. Heck, one gal my mother worked with left her boyfriend who had that same kinda mindset. He met her as she was going to work and shot her.

You need to be committed to doing -whatever- it takes to make him back off. Even if it doesn't come down to that, you need to be willing to take extreme measures to protect yourself. Dismissing the legal defences you have because it might be a hassle is a very bad idea and makes people think you don't take the situation seriously.

Oh wow :/ I don't think he'd ever do something quite that extreme... But then again i could be wrong.. I just dont have anything to put against him at the moment, no evidence or anything, im not even sure where to start tbh, im hoping he'll back off slowly but if it becomes too much then i'll obviously have to take action.. I've let my mum know and my sisters, but its only been this once so far this time he's 'watched my house' so just hoping it wont happen again...

You never want to underestimate someone who is violating your privacy. From what you've said, he's had a violent past, and desperation to make you come back to him on his terms might drive him to do things that go over the edge. He also might not be the type to hurt you, but the fact that he's willing to try to control you by watching you like that is still abusive.

And no matter what that other guy says, you do NOT deserve to be stalked by your ex just because he used you. Nobody has the right to do that to another person and nothing justifies it. No matter how sad or tragic his life experiences have been, you have the right to live your life without him watching you and questioning you should he ever think another male is in your company. You don't always need proof though. If you go to them and explain the situation, tell them of his violent background and the issue that he contacted you over the bike and that you feel he might be a threat to you, they might be able to issue a restraining order as is. And if not, they can at least give you the details on how to protect yourself just in case.

One thing I will tell you though, to me, it would be a very bad idea to consider going back to him. No matter whether you love him or miss him, he sounds dangerous and he seriously might need to seek counselling and get help before he gets into any relationships. And if you willingly go back to him, things won't improve. He will keep abusing you and controlling you. Think about going back to him if he's able to get himself under control. Because going back now is like willingly asking for a life of mental abuse and being controlled.

Thank you so much! We've had physical fights before and has hurt me, but i couldn't imagine him actually trying to hurt me badly, but i could be wrong..

Exactly, i've now accepted that he wanted nothing more to do with me, but he can't seem to accept his own words? I want to go out and have a good time without having to look over my shoulder and be paranoid of what im doing is wrong;- because it isn't. I have every right to do what i want to do when i want to do it with who i want. Yeah that would be helpful, just incase anything kicks off i will know what to do and who to contact...

Nah after these few days and thinking over everything, i know i can't go back to him now. I still love him, and i always will do, he was my first everything and i dont regret the amazing times we had together, but everything is too f*cked up now, it can't be fixed anytime soon. He will abuse me again and control me, it's just taking me awhile go realise what he was actually doing. I can't deal with the abuse and controlling anymore thats why i accepted he didnt want this anymore so quickly cos i realised neither do i. Maybe in a few years after things have changed maybe something could happen, but not anything now. Thank you once again so much <3

[klebold]

OMG Whoops

klebold

OMG Whoops

klebold

OMG Whoops

Well obviously it is bothering me, My ex is stalking me and not letting me live my life. I've had his bullsh*t for almost 2 years now and I'm growing very tired of it, the controlling, the mind f*cking the using me just for sex and weed when he wants... He's the one who tells me he doesn't want anything more to do with me then decided's to become a stalker, i know he's obviously got mental issues otherwise these 2 years of our relationship would have got a lot smoother and he wouldn't have f*cked my head up in the mean time.. I just need to see if he's serious about what he's saying or not before i can really do anything as nothing has really happend yet, just 1 phone call about a bike outside my house last night,...

At first I was going to recommend Court too, as a former psychotic stalker myself, it impacted me enough to cause me to re-think my life, got slammed with a restraining order and $162 fine, but I had no idea you were a 15 year old pot-head who screws around, the court would never smile upon you even if you tried, you deserve whatever stalking you get, because you willingly chose to be a tool for him. He didn't use you for sex and weed, you let him use you for sex and weed, you had the option to avoid all of that, and now you're learning about the consequences of letting the wrong people in. Him and I are totally different, I've never made bad decisions knowingly, only accidents, never touched drugs or alcohol, but with a some mouse clicks I can find anyone I want whenever I want within the hour, but I don't, why does he? There's got to be something else that he's looking for.

I can safely say if you've gone on my profile i haven't updated it in years, Im now 18 no longer 15 and I'm not a pot head;- he was. And i never whiling chose to be a tool, who would? I loved him enough to just look past that and think "he does love me" ... ever heard of manipulation? And i can safely say i've never made bad decisions purposely, i had no idea at the time what was going on, it's called a controlling and abusive relationship that i desperately wanted to hang on to cos he made me fee; like i had nobody else in the world.
So if you're saying that me being strong enough to get out of that, means i deserve to be stalked, then i think thats a bit messed up.

You can't be stalked when you're compelled to keep him in your life like you said earlier. You WANT his attention. You're enabling him.

Yes I'm saying I DID want his attention, i used to crave for it, but after our argument yesterday, he told me he wanted nothing more i accept it and wished him to have a good life.. i expected to never hear from him again.. but yet he calls me this morning... so i never asked for any of that attention he is now giving me.

Well then he's not a stalker he hasn't earned it yet, and he's not psychotic yet, hasn't earned that one either. Anyone with an addiction has a sense of irrationality within them, we see this in video game freaks, the way they act, but when it comes to substance abuse, it has a chemical influence on the body, compromising the mind, and causes one to be unpredictable, the answer might be even more simple than you think, since, for some reason you seem to be thinking at all, sounds like you're thinking a lot, he could just be lonely, and maintaining that dominance over you in case he needs a rebound. You need to know how guys work, and believe me, you have no clue. He just tried to scare you.

[OMG Whoops]

klebold

OMG Whoops

klebold

OMG Whoops

klebold

OMG Whoops

Well obviously it is bothering me, My ex is stalking me and not letting me live my life. I've had his bullsh*t for almost 2 years now and I'm growing very tired of it, the controlling, the mind f*cking the using me just for sex and weed when he wants... He's the one who tells me he doesn't want anything more to do with me then decided's to become a stalker, i know he's obviously got mental issues otherwise these 2 years of our relationship would have got a lot smoother and he wouldn't have f*cked my head up in the mean time.. I just need to see if he's serious about what he's saying or not before i can really do anything as nothing has really happend yet, just 1 phone call about a bike outside my house last night,...

At first I was going to recommend Court too, as a former psychotic stalker myself, it impacted me enough to cause me to re-think my life, got slammed with a restraining order and $162 fine, but I had no idea you were a 15 year old pot-head who screws around, the court would never smile upon you even if you tried, you deserve whatever stalking you get, because you willingly chose to be a tool for him. He didn't use you for sex and weed, you let him use you for sex and weed, you had the option to avoid all of that, and now you're learning about the consequences of letting the wrong people in. Him and I are totally different, I've never made bad decisions knowingly, only accidents, never touched drugs or alcohol, but with a some mouse clicks I can find anyone I want whenever I want within the hour, but I don't, why does he? There's got to be something else that he's looking for.

I can safely say if you've gone on my profile i haven't updated it in years, Im now 18 no longer 15 and I'm not a pot head;- he was. And i never whiling chose to be a tool, who would? I loved him enough to just look past that and think "he does love me" ... ever heard of manipulation? And i can safely say i've never made bad decisions purposely, i had no idea at the time what was going on, it's called a controlling and abusive relationship that i desperately wanted to hang on to cos he made me fee; like i had nobody else in the world.
So if you're saying that me being strong enough to get out of that, means i deserve to be stalked, then i think thats a bit messed up.

You can't be stalked when you're compelled to keep him in your life like you said earlier. You WANT his attention. You're enabling him.

Yes I'm saying I DID want his attention, i used to crave for it, but after our argument yesterday, he told me he wanted nothing more i accept it and wished him to have a good life.. i expected to never hear from him again.. but yet he calls me this morning... so i never asked for any of that attention he is now giving me.

Well then he's not a stalker he hasn't earned it yet, and he's not psychotic yet, hasn't earned that one either. Anyone with an addiction has a sense of irrationality within them, we see this in video game freaks, the way they act, but when it comes to substance abuse, it has a chemical influence on the body, compromising the mind, and causes one to be unpredictable, the answer might be even more simple than you think, since, for some reason you seem to be thinking at all, sounds like you're thinking a lot, he could just be lonely, and maintaining that dominance over you in case he needs a rebound. You need to know how guys work, and believe me, you have no clue. He just tried to scare you.

I know I'm a freaking re-bound thats why he's trying to keep me here. He doesn't have luck with girls so when that fails he comes crawling back to me. I KNOW he was just trying to scare me, i swear i've said that in a post somewhere.. He's trying to scare me that he's watching me [even though he obviously did last night] so that i wont leave my house and i wont have people round, cos i think he'll be watching. But Im going out tonight with friends whether he likes it or not. its my life, not his to control anymore.

[Altysay]

speaking of stalkers -stalks nini-kun-

[OMG Whoops]

Altysay

speaking of stalkers -stalks nini-kun-

aha emotion_dowant

[Altysay]

OMG Whoops

Altysay

speaking of stalkers -stalks nini-kun-

aha emotion_dowant

you saw nothin! I ish ninja there for I am super sneaky!

[Kaname_Is_Here]

Grandiloquence

Document, document, document.
Any and all messages, phone calls (depending on the state, I think, some won't allow a recorded phone convo in court without permission from the person being recorded), s**t done to your possessions, anything suspicious.
Then, file harassment charges against him.

Yeah, dates, times. What was said, what tone. Shouting, calm voice. Detail EVERYTHING!! Then call the police, and BOOM harrasment!
x

[gngrsnaps]

Grandiloquence

Document, document, document.
Any and all messages, phone calls (depending on the state, I think, some won't allow a recorded phone convo in court without permission from the person being recorded), s**t done to your possessions, anything suspicious.
Then, file harassment charges against him.

This. BTDT not fun and can be more dangerous than annoying.