Stalker Ex Boyfriend... o__o

[OMG Whoops]

I previously made a post about how I finally got rid of my controlling ex...
But now he's turned creepy....

I get a phone call from him waking me up this morning saying
"Who's bike was that outside your house last night?"
Now, he lives quite far away, and doesn't have a car or any transport so couldn't just get over here easily.
Yes it was my friend's bike, but i told him it was my mums friend who came over, as it really has nothing to do with him. He obviously didn't just drive past with a friend, as he had a good look at the bike and described it all to me..
He doesn't believe me which i really don't care about.
But he's told me... he's got people watching my house and me and will do for a long time...
How creepy is that?!

He blocked me on fb yesterday and told me he was going to change his number etc as it had finally sunk in that i wanted him to go...
But now i seem to have a psycho stalker on my hands...
What the f*ck right?
What the hell am i supposed to do now?
Got people watching my every move and my house.... Such a creep!

[Grandiloquence]

Document, document, document.
Any and all messages, phone calls (depending on the state, I think, some won't allow a recorded phone convo in court without permission from the person being recorded), s**t done to your possessions, anything suspicious.
Then, file harassment charges against him.

[Ni-Ni-kun]

This is where the police come in handy. Being obsessive is one thing but that is a scary level of stalker you have at hand. In short I agree with Grandiloquence. If you're living with your parents and he's also living with his parents, alert your mother about it maybe? Just make sure it doesn't backfire on yourself instead of him. Your parents and his parents might have a 'little talk'.
Show the proof if you show your parents. So that the mom of the guy isn't all oh
he's 'innocent'. So now you have two ways of dealing with this.

[OMG Whoops]

Ni-Ni-kun

This is where the police come in handy. Being obsessive is one thing but that is a scary level of stalker you have at hand. In short I agree with Grandiloquence. If you're living with your parents and he's also living with his parents, alert your mother about it maybe? Just make sure it doesn't backfire on yourself instead of him. Your parents and his parents might have a 'little talk'.
Show the proof if you show your parents. So that the mom of the guy isn't all oh
he's 'innocent'. So now you have two ways of dealing with this.

Im not sure what the courts are like in England with recorded messages and stuff, and im not sure if i can do that on my phone, i've tried to call him again to see if he'll say it again but he kept rejecting the calls so i gave up.
I've told my mum and I've been tempted to call his house phone and speak to his mother about it.
This isn't the first time he's 'been watching me' He did it before ages ago when we broke up for a short period of time, went nuts cos my mate came round for a 'smoke' and wanted to kill him..
He's not right in the head and its the typical case of "i dont want you but nobody else can have you" to the extreme it seems. He's admitted to me before that he doesn't want anybody else to have me emotion_eyebrow
Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

[Ni-Ni-kun]

OMG Whoops

Ni-Ni-kun

This is where the police come in handy. Being obsessive is one thing but that is a scary level of stalker you have at hand. In short I agree with Grandiloquence. If you're living with your parents and he's also living with his parents, alert your mother about it maybe? Just make sure it doesn't backfire on yourself instead of him. Your parents and his parents might have a 'little talk'.
Show the proof if you show your parents. So that the mom of the guy isn't all oh
he's 'innocent'. So now you have two ways of dealing with this.

Im not sure what the courts are like in England with recorded messages and stuff, and im not sure if i can do that on my phone, i've tried to call him again to see if he'll say it again but he kept rejecting the calls so i gave up.
I've told my mum and I've been tempted to call his house phone and speak to his mother about it.
This isn't the first time he's 'been watching me' He did it before ages ago when we broke up for a short period of time, went nuts cos my mate came round for a 'smoke' and wanted to kill him..
He's not right in the head and its the typical case of "i dont want you but nobody else can have you" to the extreme it seems. He's admitted to me before that he doesn't want anybody else to have me emotion_eyebrow
Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

Alright can't argue with that ._.

I said those two things because I think it's scary that he'd go this far.
And I am afraid that maybe if you 'let him' then he gets the sign that 'this is okay'
and he keeps on doing it.

The way his head thinks? Is that he's overly dependent on you
even though you guys broke up. This mentality is, I lost therefore not only will I lose,
but anyone else can't win, cause I lost. It's an extremist sore loser mentality.
And to hire people to stalk you.. I don't know. If you feel it's getting worse please
do not ignore o .o; If he gives up then well your mentality works out for the best.
Pray that he gives up then. And moves on to someone else. Getting him to say it
will be hard since now he knows that you might use it against him. = .=

Well getting his mom to know 'if possible' would be the least you can do, provided you feel there is no improvement at all. Some people wise up after a while, or they get worse. See which one it is and act if it gets very uncomfortable. It's your right.

[OMG Whoops]

Ni-Ni-kun

OMG Whoops

Ni-Ni-kun

This is where the police come in handy. Being obsessive is one thing but that is a scary level of stalker you have at hand. In short I agree with Grandiloquence. If you're living with your parents and he's also living with his parents, alert your mother about it maybe? Just make sure it doesn't backfire on yourself instead of him. Your parents and his parents might have a 'little talk'.
Show the proof if you show your parents. So that the mom of the guy isn't all oh
he's 'innocent'. So now you have two ways of dealing with this.

Im not sure what the courts are like in England with recorded messages and stuff, and im not sure if i can do that on my phone, i've tried to call him again to see if he'll say it again but he kept rejecting the calls so i gave up.
I've told my mum and I've been tempted to call his house phone and speak to his mother about it.
This isn't the first time he's 'been watching me' He did it before ages ago when we broke up for a short period of time, went nuts cos my mate came round for a 'smoke' and wanted to kill him..
He's not right in the head and its the typical case of "i dont want you but nobody else can have you" to the extreme it seems. He's admitted to me before that he doesn't want anybody else to have me emotion_eyebrow
Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

Alright can't argue with that ._.

I said those two things because I think it's scary that he'd go this far.
And I am afraid that maybe if you 'let him' then he gets the sign that 'this is okay'
and he keeps on doing it.

The way his head thinks? Is that he's overly dependent on you
even though you guys broke up. This mentality is, I lost therefore not only will I lose,
but anyone else can't win, cause I lost. It's an extremist sore loser mentality.
And to hire people to stalk you.. I don't know. If you feel it's getting worse please
do not ignore o .o; If he gives up then well your mentality works out for the best.
Pray that he gives up then. And moves on to someone else. Getting him to say it
will be hard since now he knows that you might use it against him. = .=

Well getting his mom to know 'if possible' would be the least you can do, provided you feel there is no improvement at all. Some people wise up after a while, or they get worse. See which one it is and act if it gets very uncomfortable. It's your right.

Yeah it is really creepy he'd go this far... And like said what gives you the right to watch my freaking house? i have no idea what you get up too so that's not exactly fair. And he just like ignored what i said really :s

He broke up with me and wanted to get rid of me, but yet he say's he cant get rid of me completely and is now watching my house to see if anybody comes round o_o
Before he stopped cos we went out again so obviously i was all his.... But this time he said there's no chance of us getting back together and after what he's done to me i dont want him back either, yes i would love to be friends but thats something completely different.
If things get worse i think ill get in contact with his mother, if she believes me or not thats her problem, she hates me right now anyway haha.
Im just going to see how much more he phones me up and says and what happens before i take any action.. i think he's trying to stop me form enjoying myself and just sitting at home but i can do what i want... with who i want.. when i want... he does so why can't i? emotion_yatta

[Demyan The Devil]

OMG Whoops

Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

Then I guess this isn't bothering you as much as you put across. Have fun letting someone with possible mental issues pursue you without your knowledge.

[OMG Whoops]

Melly Kwistmass

OMG Whoops

Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

Then I guess this isn't bothering you as much as you put across. Have fun letting someone with possible mental issues pursue you without your knowledge.

Well obviously it is bothering me, My ex is stalking me and not letting me live my life. I've had his bullsh*t for almost 2 years now and I'm growing very tired of it, the controlling, the mind f*cking the using me just for sex and weed when he wants... He's the one who tells me he doesn't want anything more to do with me then decided's to become a stalker, i know he's obviously got mental issues otherwise these 2 years of our relationship would have got a lot smoother and he wouldn't have f*cked my head up in the mean time.. I just need to see if he's serious about what he's saying or not before i can really do anything as nothing has really happend yet, just 1 phone call about a bike outside my house last night,...

[klebold]

I believe in both sides of the story, but there's little the police can do. Do you take no fault in this at all? People aren't naturally stalkers or even psychotic from birth, they typically develop it after being traumatized, emotionally in this case, did you lead him on and then cheat? Lying will only make this worse, I think he desperately wants the truth, doesn't sound like he wants to hurt you, and if he wanted to, he would have already. Sounds like you two were distant, it has a lot to do with constantly wondering, you know how that feels, it sucks to wonder, and he just wants answers. You're proving nothing by withholding answers from him, you're not proving anything by ignoring him, have you even asked him what he ultimately wants?

[Sinivar]

I think what they mean is that if you aren't willing to take legal measures because it's "too much of a hassle" then it must not be that big of a problem if you aren't willing to take the steps to end it.

If it's a serious issue, you need to treat it like one. And that means involving the law sometimes. Even if it does seem extreme, sometimes it's a hassle you -need- to be willing to go through.

I'll tell you now, people with an "If I can't have you, nobody can" mentality can be extremely dangerous. Heck, one gal my mother worked with left her boyfriend who had that same kinda mindset. He met her as she was going to work and shot her.

You need to be committed to doing -whatever- it takes to make him back off. Even if it doesn't come down to that, you need to be willing to take extreme measures to protect yourself. Dismissing the legal defences you have because it might be a hassle is a very bad idea and makes people think you don't take the situation seriously.

[klebold]

OMG Whoops

Melly Kwistmass

OMG Whoops

Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

Then I guess this isn't bothering you as much as you put across. Have fun letting someone with possible mental issues pursue you without your knowledge.

Well obviously it is bothering me, My ex is stalking me and not letting me live my life. I've had his bullsh*t for almost 2 years now and I'm growing very tired of it, the controlling, the mind f*cking the using me just for sex and weed when he wants... He's the one who tells me he doesn't want anything more to do with me then decided's to become a stalker, i know he's obviously got mental issues otherwise these 2 years of our relationship would have got a lot smoother and he wouldn't have f*cked my head up in the mean time.. I just need to see if he's serious about what he's saying or not before i can really do anything as nothing has really happend yet, just 1 phone call about a bike outside my house last night,...

At first I was going to recommend Court too, as a former psychotic stalker myself, it impacted me enough to cause me to re-think my life, got slammed with a restraining order and $162 fine, but I had no idea you were a 15 year old pot-head who screws around, the court would never smile upon you even if you tried, you deserve whatever stalking you get, because you willingly chose to be a tool for him. He didn't use you for sex and weed, you let him use you for sex and weed, you had the option to avoid all of that, and now you're learning about the consequences of letting the wrong people in. Him and I are totally different, I've never made bad decisions knowingly, only accidents, never touched drugs or alcohol, but with a some mouse clicks I can find anyone I want whenever I want within the hour, but I don't, why does he? There's got to be something else that he's looking for.

[OMG Whoops]

klebold

I believe in both sides of the story, but there's little the police can do. Do you take no fault in this at all? People aren't naturally stalkers or even psychotic from birth, they typically develop it after being traumatized, emotionally in this case, did you lead him on and then cheat? Lying will only make this worse, I think he desperately wants the truth, doesn't sound like he wants to hurt you, and if he wanted to, he would have already. Sounds like you two were distant, it has a lot to do with constantly wondering, you know how that feels, it sucks to wonder, and he just wants answers. You're proving nothing by withholding answers from him, you're not proving anything by ignoring him, have you even asked him what he ultimately wants?

His past isn't a very pretty one, drugs, gangs, voielnce, friends being killed etc.. :/ and when i met him it wasn't quite right but never let on until like half way through our relationship. His mother treats his father the way he treated me, with disrespect and violence and expects to get 100% respect back. I wasn't perfect in the relationship, but i never lied, i never cheated and i can safely swear on my life to that, cheaters disgust me and i think it's a terrible thing to do to another human being. I would never stoop that low. I was the one saying to him, i want the truth, [cos i have a feeling he'd cheated or something had happend as i had random girls telling em stories that could've easily happend] i was the one who yesterday was crying down the phone telling him all i want is to get back together again and i'd do anything for that but he kept denying me and saying it will never happen... so after some thought i called him back and wished him to have a nice life and he suddenly changed his tune to I HATE YOU to i will still talk to you... He's the one who's ignoring me, i've never ignored him cos i hate it, so why do it to somebody else? and i have asked him what he wants.. but he can never answer me, he always says "i dont know.." Example... - He wanted me back a few days ago, then wanted me back in a few years time so he could sleep around [his words not mine] and then he doesn't want me back at all then yesterday he did and then didnt in the space of 10 minutes.. I'm not saying im perfect, but i accepted the fact he didnt want anything more to do with me, and yet he's now watching my every move and my house, he really doesn't want me to be with anybody else but he doesn't want me himself either.. its a difficult situation...

[OMG Whoops]

Sinivar

I think what they mean is that if you aren't willing to take legal measures because it's "too much of a hassle" then it must not be that big of a problem if you aren't willing to take the steps to end it.

If it's a serious issue, you need to treat it like one. And that means involving the law sometimes. Even if it does seem extreme, sometimes it's a hassle you -need- to be willing to go through.

I'll tell you now, people with an "If I can't have you, nobody can" mentality can be extremely dangerous. Heck, one gal my mother worked with left her boyfriend who had that same kinda mindset. He met her as she was going to work and shot her.

You need to be committed to doing -whatever- it takes to make him back off. Even if it doesn't come down to that, you need to be willing to take extreme measures to protect yourself. Dismissing the legal defences you have because it might be a hassle is a very bad idea and makes people think you don't take the situation seriously.

Oh wow :/ I don't think he'd ever do something quite that extreme... But then again i could be wrong.. I just dont have anything to put against him at the moment, no evidence or anything, im not even sure where to start tbh, im hoping he'll back off slowly but if it becomes too much then i'll obviously have to take action.. I've let my mum know and my sisters, but its only been this once so far this time he's 'watched my house' so just hoping it wont happen again...

[Ni-Ni-kun]

OMG Whoops

Melly Kwistmass

OMG Whoops

Don't really want to take it to court to be honest too much hassle emotion_awesome
I think he's doing it to scare me out of actually going out and having people over, but i can do what i want. And if he wants to stalk me about it then so be it, just shows how crazy he is. emotion_c8

Then I guess this isn't bothering you as much as you put across. Have fun letting someone with possible mental issues pursue you without your knowledge.

Well obviously it is bothering me, My ex is stalking me and not letting me live my life. I've had his bullsh*t for almost 2 years now and I'm growing very tired of it, the controlling, the mind f*cking the using me just for sex and weed when he wants... He's the one who tells me he doesn't want anything more to do with me then decided's to become a stalker, i know he's obviously got mental issues otherwise these 2 years of our relationship would have got a lot smoother and he wouldn't have f*cked my head up in the mean time.. I just need to see if he's serious about what he's saying or not before i can really do anything as nothing has really happend yet, just 1 phone call about a bike outside my house last night,...

See all of the above is enough proof. That he's serious. If he's used you before. That is proof enough. I know you don't like 'hassles' but I think enough is enough. Nopes I think you think is enough is enough. I thought he only did this twice provided the answer you've given. But whether you broke up or are together this guy has obviously been serious at manipulating your mind. Don't let your mind play tricks on you now. You don't need more proof, you've seen enough. If he makes another move, document it, use it if you need. Whether it's a talk between mothers or actual legal stuff. Don't be waiting for a third or fourth move.

[Doctor g r a c i e]

Yeah just write everything down. Dont answer his messages or calls at all.

Happened to me and I did just that, after about 2 months he finally stopped.