So I Broke My Mom's Heart...

[AngelsDreadedFear]

First off, for you to understand this issue I must give you a little detail on my mental statius.

I have paranoid schizophrenia...and possibily Post Tramatic Stress Disorder...

I have had many hallucinations and delusions and have recently found out that the things I saw, heard, and felt wasn't real. I also found out that things I believed(Delusions) were not real also.

I recently wrote a mini book for my doctors and mom to read to better understand me. What I wrote broke my mom's heart.

I wrote about being adopted from somewhere else and my mom started to cry. She told me that what I wrote upset her. I apologized to her saying that I now know that it is not real. She seemed to feel slightly better but I still can tell that she is hurt.

What can I do to help my mom? I hate seeing her upset.


Help is much appreciated...

[angel_259236102]

Fix yourself. That is the best way to deal with things. If you get a hold on your schizo stuff, then you can reconnect with your mom again knowng what is real and what isnt.

[Incinerated Innocence]

It's not your fault that you're schizophrenic, but I can understand why your mum is upset. It's not your fault, and she's probably just wondering if there was something she could have done to prevent your disorder (which there probably isn't) so just let her get over it in her own time.

[keitaro_makihara]

Well, first off, its always hard for a mother to know that their child is hurting or having troubles.

I broke my mother's heart many years ago myself, but we now have a relatively decent relationship. When she finally understood the amount of pain I was in, it made it easier for her to know and relate to what I was going through, although it was definitely hard for her. But because of that, she helped me get the help I needed. When I started getting a handle on things, and really utilized the tools out there to get to a place where I could better handle my issues and live a decent life, she felt better as well. I think that reaching out by writing was a good start, even though its rough. Talk to her, let her know what's going on, talk to her about how you're seeking treatment, and I'm sure she'll feel good that you're willing to share your thoughts and feelings with her. Remember that you don't have to make the journey alone.

PTSD is a very difficult monster to face, as well as schizophrenia (I only have experience with PTSD, though). But once you really get a good handle on those things, life will get better.. Its sounds like you've made a good start.