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Tags: postrape  abortion 
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I never really thought I'd ever come to the point in life where I'd have to concider abortion. I've never really had an opinion on it since it's never been my business.

A couple of days ago I became the victim of rape. I barely remember the situation. I don't think the one glass of wine I had an hour earlier would make me forget so much so i'm assuming date drugs were involved since I did have a glass of water at the bar.

In whichever case. I'm lesbian and I'd never actively choose to have intercourse with a male even less unprotected such. But it's happened against my will. I am 22 years old and I can barely feed myself because of my economical status.

I'm currently on a postcoital contraceptive which is making me slightly dizzy and sick, but with a hopeful 85% chance of avoiding inplantation I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

My question to you is this:

Would you, if you were in my situation have an abortion if the postcoital contraceptive didn't work?
If not, would you rather let the child starve to death once born since I can't support it?
Would you also have me, a blatant lesbian raise a child alone?

What I've planned if NorLevo, my postcoital contraceptive (day after pill) fails is to have a chemical/medical abortion within 18 weeks. I know the side effects of such, and frankly I couldn't love the result of a rape anyway so I'll be the "murderer" this time.
 
     
 
I probably would have you give the child up for adoption.
     
Torikai
I never really thought I'd ever come to the point in life where I'd have to concider abortion. I've never really had an opinion on it since it's never been my business.

A couple of days ago I became the victim of rape. I barely remember the situation. I don't think the one glass of wine I had an hour earlier would make me forget so much so i'm assuming date drugs were involved since I did have a glass of water at the bar.

In whichever case. I'm lesbian and I'd never actively choose to have intercourse with a male even less unprotected such. But it's happened against my will. I am 22 years old and I can barely feed myself because of my economical status.

I'm currently on a postcoital contraceptive which is making me slightly dizzy and sick, but with a hopeful 85% chance of avoiding inplantation I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

My question to you is this:

Would you, if you were in my situation have an abortion if the postcoital contraceptive didn't work?
If not, would you rather let the child starve to death once born since I can't support it?
Would you also have me, a blatant lesbian raise a child alone?

What I've planned if NorLevo, my postcoital contraceptive (day after pill) fails is to have a chemical/medical abortion within 18 weeks. I know the side effects of such, and frankly I couldn't love the result of a rape anyway so I'll be the "murderer" this time.

I for one support abortion so long as you don't use it as a form of birth control. As in having sex willing and getting pregnant and not wanting to deal with the consquences. So in your case I'd say go get the abortion if its right for you. I'd say I wouldn't keep the child because I would never make my husband love the child of the man who raped me. But I would only abort if I was suicidal. Have you considered adoption? fell free to PM me I was raped about 5 years ago and I'm willing to lend you my shoulder
 
     
 
I would abort it if I were you, do you really want something to remind you of the terrible thing that happened to you everyday of your life?
It's your body and your choice.
If you're not in a position that you can raise a child you can always put it up for adoption if you don't want an abortion, but from what you said it doesn't really sound like you can afford to take a maternity leave from your job.
I know this is a hard thing to go through, but if you ever need someone to talk to who has gone through something similar you can always message me, doing it alone is terribly hard.
     
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USA has lotsa strict rules about abortion i heard, but i don't think the kid would live happily if you actually gave birth to it, and abotion is NOT murder because sure its "becoming" a life but its not thinking, or seeing, or hearing.

If i was in your situation I wouldn't doubt, I would abort it as fast as possible.
 
     

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Adoption is not an option for me. First of all adoption rules in sweden are pretty weird and I don't want to carry the offspring of someone I hate dearly. I have a girlfriend who would definitely frow to hate both me and whatever would be in my stomach if I kept it. It just doesn't work that way. I also don't want to put a life into this world without certainty of it being loved and cared for. And trust me, that's not always the case for adopted children. I will have kids in the future but it has to be an active choice for me to carry it. This is how I put it to my girlfriend when we discussed it. "If I can't afford an adoption I'll make sure to get hit by a car so the little ******** in my stomach falls out". I really hate whatever is in there. It makes me impure. Stained. I've saved myself for my girlfriend, and then this happens.

And for whoever would even concider using abortion as birthcontrol: you must be mad. Medical abortion makes you bleed for up to two months. It's not exactly...worth it if it's purely for birth control.
     
I hope it's successful and I'm sorry to hear about your situation.

Personally, if I were in your situation I would abort as well. I would not allow a rapist the priviledge of propogating his genes.
 
     


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Torikai
Adoption is not an option for me. First of all adoption rules in sweden are pretty weird and I don't want to carry the offspring of someone I hate dearly. I have a girlfriend who would definitely frow to hate both me and whatever would be in my stomach if I kept it. It just doesn't work that way. I also don't want to put a life into this world without certainty of it being loved and cared for. And trust me, that's not always the case for adopted children. I will have kids in the future but it has to be an active choice for me to carry it. This is how I put it to my girlfriend when we discussed it. "If I can't afford an adoption I'll make sure to get hit by a car so the little ******** in my stomach falls out". I really hate whatever is in there. It makes me impure. Stained. I've saved myself for my girlfriend, and then this happens.

And for whoever would even concider using abortion as birthcontrol: you must be mad. Medical abortion makes you bleed for up to two months. It's not exactly...worth it if it's purely for birth control.

There are poeple who don't want to take the pill or use condoms and then abort when they get pregnant. If you hate it and want to abort than do it and if someone tells you that your a murderer just telling in graphic detail what happened and exaggerate and ask if they would want the daily reminder for 9 months.
     
If I was you, I would make the decision to abort in that situation. I wouldn't want a child I couldn't care for, and I definitely wouldn't want to carry to term if I wasn't planning on keeping it and didn't have the means to pay or care for it. Not to mention all the money that goes into the pre-natal care. And honestly, I don't want a kid that wasn't someone's I love.

The adoption system where I live in the States is so whack. I don't want my child thrown into that and be passed around from foster home to foster home, because there's not a guarantee of it being adopted, and it's much harder to find someone to adopt an older child too.

Best of luck to you though, and I hope it all goes well.

I'm surprised I haven't seen the hardcore pro-lifers hit this yet.
 
     
 
Thanks for the support you guys. Since I can't quite remember the incident, and the day after pill isn't 100% guarranteed i'll have to wait and see two weeks. Pee on a stick and all that. I've made up my mind and all. I already have my plan.
I also have some great friends and gf who take care of me aswell as my lil psychiatrist on the phone. I have social anxiety disorder on top of all this and for once it turned out to be useful since I already have a professional person to talk to.

And yeah I know the rules in america are a lot stricter. you don't even have the postcoital pill I'm on right now. I feel lucky I'm a swede again. The possible abortion won't cost more than 50usd. I can afford that.

Oh. Daily reminder of the incident. Wouldn't I make a great mother if that's what I though as soon as I saw the kid? XD Yep. I'm glad I'm already able to joke about it.
     
Rose the Homicidal Maniac
If I was you, I would make the decision to abort in that situation. I wouldn't want a child I couldn't care for, and I definitely wouldn't want to carry to term if I wasn't planning on keeping it and didn't have the means to pay or care for it. Not to mention all the money that goes into the pre-natal care. And honestly, I don't want a kid that wasn't someone's I love.

The adoption system where I live in the States is so whack. I don't want my child thrown into that and be passed around from foster home to foster home, because there's not a guarantee of it being adopted, and it's much harder to find someone to adopt an older child too.

Best of luck to you though, and I hope it all goes well.

I'm surprised I haven't seen the hardcore pro-lifers hit this yet.

This is actually only with the older children babies usually get adopted very quickly because they aren't "scarred" and If you go private you can get the baby adopted before their born. Not argueing with you I just had did the research in the 1 day between finding out I was pregnant with my "daughter" and losing her when I was 17.
 
     
 
Just letting you know, as for now, OP is leaving the thread. Needs to get foods. Thanks all of you for your opinions and support. It helps me distance myself and clear up my mind to discuss this with strangers.
     

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USA has lotsa strict rules about abortion i heard, but i don't think the kid would live happily if you actually gave birth to it, and abotion is NOT murder because sure its "becoming" a life but its not thinking, or seeing, or hearing.

If i was in your situation I wouldn't doubt, I would abort it as fast as possible.


The laws change per state actually. Some states are more lenient than others. But I think it's only strict for underage girls. Anyway, you're from Sweden OP? I don't know the laws there and if you don't either, look them up. Just so you know all the rules.
 
     
 
froggymama89
Rose the Homicidal Maniac
If I was you, I would make the decision to abort in that situation. I wouldn't want a child I couldn't care for, and I definitely wouldn't want to carry to term if I wasn't planning on keeping it and didn't have the means to pay or care for it. Not to mention all the money that goes into the pre-natal care. And honestly, I don't want a kid that wasn't someone's I love.

The adoption system where I live in the States is so whack. I don't want my child thrown into that and be passed around from foster home to foster home, because there's not a guarantee of it being adopted, and it's much harder to find someone to adopt an older child too.

Best of luck to you though, and I hope it all goes well.

I'm surprised I haven't seen the hardcore pro-lifers hit this yet.

This is actually only with the older children babies usually get adopted very quickly because they aren't "scarred" and If you go private you can get the baby adopted before their born. Not argueing with you I just had did the research in the 1 day between finding out I was pregnant with my "daughter" and losing her when I was 17.
And I have just one thing to say to that, did you really read what I said there? No.
     
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Rose the Homicidal Maniac
froggymama89
Rose the Homicidal Maniac
If I was you, I would make the decision to abort in that situation. I wouldn't want a child I couldn't care for, and I definitely wouldn't want to carry to term if I wasn't planning on keeping it and didn't have the means to pay or care for it. Not to mention all the money that goes into the pre-natal care. And honestly, I don't want a kid that wasn't someone's I love.

The adoption system where I live in the States is so whack. I don't want my child thrown into that and be passed around from foster home to foster home, because there's not a guarantee of it being adopted, and it's much harder to find someone to adopt an older child too.

Best of luck to you though, and I hope it all goes well.

I'm surprised I haven't seen the hardcore pro-lifers hit this yet.

This is actually only with the older children babies usually get adopted very quickly because they aren't "scarred" and If you go private you can get the baby adopted before their born. Not argueing with you I just had did the research in the 1 day between finding out I was pregnant with my "daughter" and losing her when I was 17.
And I have just one thing to say to that, did you really read what I said there? No.

What are you saying I did not actually read so that I may correct myself if necisary. I'm just saying that babies do find homes rather quickly and don't get passed around a lot it's the kids that do. and it was only to the part I highlighted
 
     
FROGGYMAMA89

Need advice? a shoulder to cry on? someone to talk to? feel free to PM me.
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