i r i d e s s i c a n c e
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- Posted: Tue, 05 Feb 2013 18:21:16 +0000
Squishy1423
Hello Gaia. I'm just gonna cut to the chase here. K?
For the first twenty something years of my life I was alone. Sure I had the odd hookup here and there but it never went anywhere. Then I meet this girl on the Internet and we really hit it off. We like a lot of the same stuff and we get along great. There were a few annoyances as there are with any relationship I guess, but I figured we'd get past them.
So after we've been dating for about 6 months or so we decide to move in together. She refuses to leave her hometown and my job was getting shut down, so I moved here. At first it was ok, yes it was a big adjustment, but I got past that for her. I'm lookin for a job around here and unfortunately we live with her parents, don't get me started on them, but things are still generally ok.
But lately, idk I feel trapped or smothered or something I guess. I never thought I'd say this but I miss home. I miss my family. And weirdest of all I miss being single. A lot of things about her start bugging me like her strange refusal to get wifi, her massive OCD, her mood swings and crankyness. Normally to cope with things like this ( don't give your drugs are bad stuff, I've heard it all before and am not interested) I would smoke some weed. Calms me down, changes perspective, generally makes me feel good. But she always makes me feel guilty about it. If I even mention the subject I might like a toke, she gets downright hostile. Yet her family smoke cigs like chimneys. But whatever. I miss not having to censor myself for the feelings of another. I miss not feeling smothered.
Latley I find myself feeling like I should break up with her. Problem is that I really do love her. She does mostly make me happy. I really don't think she deserves to have her heart broken and she's so good to me too. I really don't know what to do. So I come to strangers seeking advice or something idk. Help?
For the first twenty something years of my life I was alone. Sure I had the odd hookup here and there but it never went anywhere. Then I meet this girl on the Internet and we really hit it off. We like a lot of the same stuff and we get along great. There were a few annoyances as there are with any relationship I guess, but I figured we'd get past them.
So after we've been dating for about 6 months or so we decide to move in together. She refuses to leave her hometown and my job was getting shut down, so I moved here. At first it was ok, yes it was a big adjustment, but I got past that for her. I'm lookin for a job around here and unfortunately we live with her parents, don't get me started on them, but things are still generally ok.
But lately, idk I feel trapped or smothered or something I guess. I never thought I'd say this but I miss home. I miss my family. And weirdest of all I miss being single. A lot of things about her start bugging me like her strange refusal to get wifi, her massive OCD, her mood swings and crankyness. Normally to cope with things like this ( don't give your drugs are bad stuff, I've heard it all before and am not interested) I would smoke some weed. Calms me down, changes perspective, generally makes me feel good. But she always makes me feel guilty about it. If I even mention the subject I might like a toke, she gets downright hostile. Yet her family smoke cigs like chimneys. But whatever. I miss not having to censor myself for the feelings of another. I miss not feeling smothered.
Latley I find myself feeling like I should break up with her. Problem is that I really do love her. She does mostly make me happy. I really don't think she deserves to have her heart broken and she's so good to me too. I really don't know what to do. So I come to strangers seeking advice or something idk. Help?
What you need is your personal space and personal time. It's normal to feel smothered if you are constantly around her and do things you don't feel like putting up with. Why not set up a schedule and such? Tell her you need a night to go out by yourself and relax at a cafe, go visit friends, library, etc. And make sure you are detailed with her about it so her OCD won't lead to paranoia and fear you are cheating on her. But several hours a day a few days a week would do you some good. Just tell her you'll give her a text when you get to the place and when you are leaving and if something goes wrong you'll let her know about that too, other than that you'll have your phone off so you won't have to deal with anything but enjoying yourself.