I cheated on her.

[The Luminosity]

Invalid Excuse

Okay, as I stated above..yes, I cheated on my girlfriend of almost two years. I hadn't of intended to do so. But as it started escalating, I just couldn't figure out what I wanted anymore.
She's a great girl, actually..maybe almost perfect. But enough about that for now,
I feel selfish that I did that to her, because now I know that things will be a rough patch for awhile.
I don't blame her, I spilled everything to her and I know she's still hurt.
If she were to ever leave me, I'd completely understand that.

Prior to cheating, we've hit our comfortable stage. Our sex got boring and repetitive and she was overly consuming her life at work. Of course, I'd miss her. But I knew at the end of the day, she'd come back and maybe that's whats keeping me from breaking up with her.
She tries to understand everything about me, but what she doesn't realize is me being the first
guy she'd ever been with. I have experience, I have needs that I need to take care of.

The girl I cheated on her with? Was a friend of hers. Or actually, that's what it had seemed like.
Personally once I started talking with the other girl, she was completely different. It felt as if I'd known her for ages and one thing led to another. We f*cked. That's basically how it went.
The bad thing? She ended up getting an emotional attachment with me. But she understood the situation I was in and told me its better if we stopped and I tried to make things work
with my girlfriend.

Odd situation isn't it?

But now as I'm about to start my day and see both these girls later since we all work in the same place..I can't tell what I should do. My girlfriend forgave me, but at the same time..I don't know why I just can't completely let the other girl out of my head. She's embedded my thoughts and I won't lie about it.

I'm selfish scum and I know I can't have both of them to myself.

End the relationship, because you may care about this woman, but you don't love her. Don't wait for her to break up with you, because she thinks that this can be solved, but the problem isn't her, it's you, and only you can fix yourself. Nurturing a relationship after cheating takes communication, patience, and so much more; that's too much work for you to do for a woman you don't love. Just be single, mingle, and figure yourself out.

[Reiko Iwamaru]

Honestly, if you're going to cheat, I don't think you should be in a relationship period until you can stay fully dedicated to one in the future.

[Mae Lovelyn]

Break up with your gf. While she forgave you, you still have the other girl on the brain. And just because she forgave you doesn't mean she won't forget such a massive betrayal of her trust. It's going to linger in the back of her mind and that can or will blow up bigger if it happens again.

And I'm going to agree with TasteofEnvy since you've gotten away with it once, it's going to be a temptation to do it again since your gf will be desperate enough to keep you.

[Little Dead Soldier]

It seems like you're just not ready for a relationship. It already became boring to you just after two years of dating, the sex life became dull.
Even after she forgives you, you might still be miserable later down the road with your relationship. My advice is to just break up with her and go out and just have fun.

[sexhaver]

wow! please break up with your girlfriend, she deserves someone who is there for her emotionally and physically i'm sorry but she needs someone who's gonna be there for her and obviously you have some issues you need to work out and its not fair to her to be strung along as a fall back if you have any respect for this girl you'll leave her and let her find someone who will give her the love and care she needs and deserves

[Btch_lasagna_18]

Note: I hate cheaters, so I'm going to be blunt.

Just get out of her life man. It sounds like you're just staying around because you feel bad for her. Obviously you aren't satisfied with her, so you went and ******** your ******** coworker instead of talking to her like a goddamn adult would.

You don't deserve her, and she shouldn't have to worry about you cheating on her again (oh come on, we both know that no matter what she says that's what she's thinking, her esteem is probably destroyed at this point because of you). She's scared of change and losing the first person she fell in love with, which is why she won't grow the balls she needs to leave you. Not a negative comment toward her, I know the feeling of leaving your first love even when the relationship is dead. I would have ended up staying with mine for years if he didn't break it off.

Just do her the favor and break up and then go ******** that b***h you cheated with. We know that's what you actually want. Once a cheater, always a cheating piece of s**t.

[Eiaii]

You're a shitty person and I hope she cuts you out from her life for good. That kind of thing will probably stay with her and make it hard for her to trust ANYONE again. As her boyfriend, you had one ******** job. You did a great job being a hormonal dumbass though. I wouldn't consider a guy like you to be fit for relationships in general, since you'll probably find an excuse to cheat on some poor girl again, but hopefully you'll learn to use your hamster wheel for a brain to control yourself in the future.

[Ice-Paige]

where is she now?

[nepko]

Two years is nothing. Just break up. It will be harder on the both of you to stay together and its wasting time. Dont stay with somebody because of years, stay with them because you're into them.

[Marrms]

Cheating isn't a mistake I don't care how bad people feel about it afterward. And ******** someone because you wanted attention and something different isn't a reason to do it.


Anyway.
Don't pity date this girl because you know she's still attached and you want to make her feel good again. She forgave you because you're her first, all she's ever known.. She wants to please you, so of course she's going to say she forgives you, but it's a cover up. And you know that you really don't want to be apart anymore so you need to do what's best for you as well.

[RCJ remixed]

Not really an odd situation. My husband cheated on me during our first two years of marriage with a woman he worked with. Only, he wasn't waiting for me at home - I was a stay at home mom/wife and often after work he would go out with his friends and party. We'd hit a point where it didn't really matter how much time we spent, so he did his thing, I did mine and that's when he found her.

He hid this from me for about two years until I was pregnant with our second child. I tried, so hard, to let it go, but I was not able to forgive him and that ate me up inside to the point where I cheated on him with an old high school friend. I told him the day after it happened not able to keep the guilt from him. Things were horrible for a long time. We basically had to start fresh as far as communication and trust went. Took years for either of us to let down walls without being suspicious.

But we did it.

It was more important to us to fix and work on things than to walk away. It was hard, but it happened and I don't regret staying, neither does he. He cut off ALL contact with the woman, I cut off ALL contact with the man.

The fact you work with them both is messy. If you want to work it out with your girlfriend, you need to show her you're serious. Chances are she is going to spend a lot more time at work and away now that you've done that, and you would need to be patient and VERY open about everything, and not talk to the other girl no matter how badly you want to.

Although, makes me wonder if you really want to work things out, just because I never had a problem cutting ties with the man I slept with, and my husband very easily dropped the other girl. Maybe take some time and truly decide whether or not you want to work it out. Either way, things are probably going to get worse long before they get better.

[L0LIS]

I believe in second chances, however, if you feel like you won't be able to stop the urges, you should take a break. It's better to end it and do as you please freely rather than cheating on your girlfriend countless times. Just be honest with her.

[New Vogue Child]

It happened, you've talked to your SO, you made a mistake, but it's not the end of the world.

Sort out what you really want, and I mean that -- I'm talking analyzing your life and thinking long and hard about it -- and go with what feels right for you.
Be honest with yourself, or you'll only be living in regret.

[legnanellaf5]

Invalid Excuse

legnanellaf5

Invalid Excuse

legnanellaf5

Break up. There is no reason to put the girl trhough this s**t because you are NOW feeling bad. Too little too late. She may have forgave you but she didnt forget, so if you care do her the favour and get out of her life.

I'm sure she didn't forget and probably won't for awhile. Like I stated above, I don't understand why she'd even want me around after doing that. IT obviously shows I'm bad a monogamy and that she deserves someone better than me.

So why are you still in this relationship? This whole 'she deserves better' is bullshit to feed egos. If you truly meant it you would put it into actions.

Because we've been together for almost two years. I can't seem to let that go in the shitter.
Is it wrong to try to make it work, or is it smarter to just let things go?

This is all too little too late. If being together for that long really mattered...you wouldnt have cheated. If you really didnt want to ******** up the relationship you would have had an adult conversation with your girlfriend about lack of sex, not ******** a coworker.

Trying to patch things up now that you made an issue really big doesnt actually help. You are both better off dealing with this s**t seperately, she needs to get over that blow, and you need to work on yourself and this whole 'temptations' crap.

[StreetchIck123]

Invalid Excuse

StreetchIck123

I have no remorse for cheaters. So I'll cut the sentimental it's your fault you deserve to be left crap.

What you need to do now. Is to only speak to the girl you slept with that you need to cut off contact outside of work. Goodness, you all work together.

The reason why you most likely think aboutt the other girl are because you either feel guilty or thought of "what if"

Honestly, I hate this whole "I seek attention from other people because the one i'm with doesn't give me enough" s**t. It's no excuse for cheating.. I'm not speaking just about you, but the majority of the cheating stem from that reasoning.

To me, I think you should honestly end the relationship. The trust is gone and eventually she'll resent you for it for awhile. She's only stuck by you because you're like what her first love/ boyfriend.

As a boyfriend, you better treat her a lot better than you have now. I'm not just saying that, you need to show her that you only have eyes on her not anyone else. That she's your queen and you are ready to do what it takes to make her happy. Because you ******** up pretty bad.

Yeah, that's what I did last night. I deleted, blocked, removed photos..everything. She was actually the one who persuaded me that all that she wanted was for me to try and work things out with my girlfriend. It doesn't help now that I'm attached emotionally to her and I know after seeing that, I might as well just be single.

And I will respect your words, and don't blame you for feeling that way towards anyone.
She probably wants me around because I am her first love, she's never experienced things with anybody else. She obviously still wants me around, but I can't stand hurting her, especially not anymore than what I just did.

Thanks for opening up my eyes, I just need to be smarter about the decisions I made and think about her more above anybody else.

I don't know what right for you at this point. But like someone stated, don't be with her just because you pity her. That would also suck.