I cheated on her.

[Invalid Excuse]

Okay, as I stated above..yes, I cheated on my girlfriend of almost two years. I hadn't of intended to do so. But as it started escalating, I just couldn't figure out what I wanted anymore.
She's a great girl, actually..maybe almost perfect. But enough about that for now,
I feel selfish that I did that to her, because now I know that things will be a rough patch for awhile.
I don't blame her, I spilled everything to her and I know she's still hurt.
If she were to ever leave me, I'd completely understand that.

Prior to cheating, we've hit our comfortable stage. Our sex got boring and repetitive and she was overly consuming her life at work. Of course, I'd miss her. But I knew at the end of the day, she'd come back and maybe that's whats keeping me from breaking up with her.
She tries to understand everything about me, but what she doesn't realize is me being the first
guy she'd ever been with. I have experience, I have needs that I need to take care of.

The girl I cheated on her with? Was a friend of hers. Or actually, that's what it had seemed like.
Personally once I started talking with the other girl, she was completely different. It felt as if I'd known her for ages and one thing led to another. We f*cked. That's basically how it went.
The bad thing? She ended up getting an emotional attachment with me. But she understood the situation I was in and told me its better if we stopped and I tried to make things work
with my girlfriend.

Odd situation isn't it?

But now as I'm about to start my day and see both these girls later since we all work in the same place..I can't tell what I should do. My girlfriend forgave me, but at the same time..I don't know why I just can't completely let the other girl out of my head. She's embedded my thoughts and I won't lie about it.

I'm selfish scum and I know I can't have both of them to myself.

[legnanellaf5]

Break up. There is no reason to put the girl trhough this s**t because you are NOW feeling bad. Too little too late. She may have forgave you but she didnt forget, so if you care do her the favour and get out of her life.

[TasteofEnvy]

I just can't believe she forgave you for cheating on her....
You're lucky.
But seriously, be honest with yourself. Do you see yourself cheating on her again in the future? What are you going to do when things get comfy and boring again? If you actually loved her, that wouldn't have mattered in the first place. Are you sure you really want to be with this girl? If you see yourself cheating on her again, please let her go. No one deserves to be cheated on.... ever.

Psychologically speaking, you can't get the girl out of your mind due to two things:
1) Guilty Pleasure. You ******** her. You got away with it. The id (childish side of our personality) is probably thinking "I can get away with it again"
2) Hormones. A lot of hormones are released during sex, often creating a bond (which are sometimes so strong that victims can fall in love with their rapists and couples who hate each other refuse to break up).

If you want to stay with your girlfriend, stay away from this other girl as much as you can. And don't you ever cheat on her again....

[Invalid Excuse]

legnanellaf5

Break up. There is no reason to put the girl trhough this s**t because you are NOW feeling bad. Too little too late. She may have forgave you but she didnt forget, so if you care do her the favour and get out of her life.

I'm sure she didn't forget and probably won't for awhile. Like I stated above, I don't understand why she'd even want me around after doing that. IT obviously shows I'm bad a monogamy and that she deserves someone better than me.

[Invalid Excuse]

Heartless_Angel_in_me

I just can't believe she forgave you for cheating on her....
You're lucky.
But seriously, be honest with yourself. Do you see yourself cheating on her again in the future? What are you going to do when things get comfy and boring again? If you actually loved her, that wouldn't have mattered in the first place. Are you sure you really want to be with this girl? If you see yourself cheating on her again, please let her go. No one deserves to be cheated on.... ever.

Psychologically speaking, you can't get the girl out of your mind due to two things:
1) Guilty Pleasure. You ******** her. You got away with it. The id (childish side of our personality) is probably thinking "I can get away with it again"
2) Hormones. A lot of hormones are released during sex, often creating a bond (which are sometimes so strong that victims can fall in love with their rapists and couples who hate each other refuse to break up).

If you want to stay with your girlfriend, stay away from this other girl as much as you can. And don't you ever cheat on her again....

Exactly my point. I got lucky, but at the same time..I'm holding to her fragile heart and the fact that she still wants me around. Don't get me wrong, like I stated, if she were to ever break up with me, I'd completely understand.
And yes, I admit. It was guilty pleasure and I have given it to it. And I'm fairly certain I won't be able to do it again because I wouldn't want to put that stress on her.
It just feels wrong that she's trying so hard to keep me around, but at the same time..I want her to know there are better things out there and not to ever settle for a scum like me.

[legnanellaf5]

Invalid Excuse

legnanellaf5

Break up. There is no reason to put the girl trhough this s**t because you are NOW feeling bad. Too little too late. She may have forgave you but she didnt forget, so if you care do her the favour and get out of her life.

I'm sure she didn't forget and probably won't for awhile. Like I stated above, I don't understand why she'd even want me around after doing that. IT obviously shows I'm bad a monogamy and that she deserves someone better than me.

So why are you still in this relationship? This whole 'she deserves better' is bullshit to feed egos. If you truly meant it you would put it into actions.

[TasteofEnvy]

Invalid Excuse

Heartless_Angel_in_me

I just can't believe she forgave you for cheating on her....
You're lucky.
But seriously, be honest with yourself. Do you see yourself cheating on her again in the future? What are you going to do when things get comfy and boring again? If you actually loved her, that wouldn't have mattered in the first place. Are you sure you really want to be with this girl? If you see yourself cheating on her again, please let her go. No one deserves to be cheated on.... ever.

Psychologically speaking, you can't get the girl out of your mind due to two things:
1) Guilty Pleasure. You ******** her. You got away with it. The id (childish side of our personality) is probably thinking "I can get away with it again"
2) Hormones. A lot of hormones are released during sex, often creating a bond (which are sometimes so strong that victims can fall in love with their rapists and couples who hate each other refuse to break up).

If you want to stay with your girlfriend, stay away from this other girl as much as you can. And don't you ever cheat on her again....

Exactly my point. I got lucky, but at the same time..I'm holding to her fragile heart and the fact that she still wants me around. Don't get me wrong, like I stated, if she were to ever break up with me, I'd completely understand.
And yes, I admit. It was guilty pleasure and I have given it to it. And I'm fairly certain I won't be able to do it again because I wouldn't want to put that stress on her.
It just feels wrong that she's trying so hard to keep me around, but at the same time..I want her to know there are better things out there and not to ever settle for a scum like me.

Not gonna lie, it sounds like you're just being with her because you pity her... not because you love her. And it really sounds like you want to break up with her and just don't know how to do it or are afraid she'll be drastic about it. It sounds like you WANT her to realize you're scum and break up with you.

[Invalid Excuse]

legnanellaf5

Invalid Excuse

legnanellaf5

Break up. There is no reason to put the girl trhough this s**t because you are NOW feeling bad. Too little too late. She may have forgave you but she didnt forget, so if you care do her the favour and get out of her life.

I'm sure she didn't forget and probably won't for awhile. Like I stated above, I don't understand why she'd even want me around after doing that. IT obviously shows I'm bad a monogamy and that she deserves someone better than me.

So why are you still in this relationship? This whole 'she deserves better' is bullshit to feed egos. If you truly meant it you would put it into actions.

Because we've been together for almost two years. I can't seem to let that go in the shitter.
Is it wrong to try to make it work, or is it smarter to just let things go?

[StreetchIck123]

I have no remorse for cheaters. So I'll cut the sentimental it's your fault you deserve to be left crap.

What you need to do now. Is to only speak to the girl you slept with that you need to cut off contact outside of work. Goodness, you all work together.

The reason why you most likely think aboutt the other girl are because you either feel guilty or thought of "what if"

Honestly, I hate this whole "I seek attention from other people because the one i'm with doesn't give me enough" s**t. It's no excuse for cheating.. I'm not speaking just about you, but the majority of the cheating stem from that reasoning.

To me, I think you should honestly end the relationship. The trust is gone and eventually she'll resent you for it for awhile. She's only stuck by you because you're like what her first love/ boyfriend.

As a boyfriend, you better treat her a lot better than you have now. I'm not just saying that, you need to show her that you only have eyes on her not anyone else. That she's your queen and you are ready to do what it takes to make her happy. Because you ******** up pretty bad.

[Invalid Excuse]

TasteofEnvy

Invalid Excuse

Heartless_Angel_in_me

I just can't believe she forgave you for cheating on her....
You're lucky.
But seriously, be honest with yourself. Do you see yourself cheating on her again in the future? What are you going to do when things get comfy and boring again? If you actually loved her, that wouldn't have mattered in the first place. Are you sure you really want to be with this girl? If you see yourself cheating on her again, please let her go. No one deserves to be cheated on.... ever.

Psychologically speaking, you can't get the girl out of your mind due to two things:
1) Guilty Pleasure. You ******** her. You got away with it. The id (childish side of our personality) is probably thinking "I can get away with it again"
2) Hormones. A lot of hormones are released during sex, often creating a bond (which are sometimes so strong that victims can fall in love with their rapists and couples who hate each other refuse to break up).

If you want to stay with your girlfriend, stay away from this other girl as much as you can. And don't you ever cheat on her again....

Exactly my point. I got lucky, but at the same time..I'm holding to her fragile heart and the fact that she still wants me around. Don't get me wrong, like I stated, if she were to ever break up with me, I'd completely understand.
And yes, I admit. It was guilty pleasure and I have given it to it. And I'm fairly certain I won't be able to do it again because I wouldn't want to put that stress on her.
It just feels wrong that she's trying so hard to keep me around, but at the same time..I want her to know there are better things out there and not to ever settle for a scum like me.

Not gonna lie, it sounds like you're just being with her because you pity her... not because you love her. And it really sounds like you want to break up with her and just don't know how to do it or are afraid she'll be drastic about it. It sounds like you WANT her to realize you're scum and break up with you.

You know what, you're probably right. And that is the point I would have to relay to her.

[TasteofEnvy]

Invalid Excuse

TasteofEnvy

Invalid Excuse

Heartless_Angel_in_me

I just can't believe she forgave you for cheating on her....
You're lucky.
But seriously, be honest with yourself. Do you see yourself cheating on her again in the future? What are you going to do when things get comfy and boring again? If you actually loved her, that wouldn't have mattered in the first place. Are you sure you really want to be with this girl? If you see yourself cheating on her again, please let her go. No one deserves to be cheated on.... ever.

Psychologically speaking, you can't get the girl out of your mind due to two things:
1) Guilty Pleasure. You ******** her. You got away with it. The id (childish side of our personality) is probably thinking "I can get away with it again"
2) Hormones. A lot of hormones are released during sex, often creating a bond (which are sometimes so strong that victims can fall in love with their rapists and couples who hate each other refuse to break up).

If you want to stay with your girlfriend, stay away from this other girl as much as you can. And don't you ever cheat on her again....

Exactly my point. I got lucky, but at the same time..I'm holding to her fragile heart and the fact that she still wants me around. Don't get me wrong, like I stated, if she were to ever break up with me, I'd completely understand.
And yes, I admit. It was guilty pleasure and I have given it to it. And I'm fairly certain I won't be able to do it again because I wouldn't want to put that stress on her.
It just feels wrong that she's trying so hard to keep me around, but at the same time..I want her to know there are better things out there and not to ever settle for a scum like me.

Not gonna lie, it sounds like you're just being with her because you pity her... not because you love her. And it really sounds like you want to break up with her and just don't know how to do it or are afraid she'll be drastic about it. It sounds like you WANT her to realize you're scum and break up with you.

You know what, you're probably right. And that is the point I would have to relay to her.

I really think you should sit down and tell her how you actually feel... even if you have to pull the "I think we should be apart for a while so we can see what we really want" card. You need to do what is best for both of you... and so far a break up sounds like it.

[Invalid Excuse]

StreetchIck123

I have no remorse for cheaters. So I'll cut the sentimental it's your fault you deserve to be left crap.

What you need to do now. Is to only speak to the girl you slept with that you need to cut off contact outside of work. Goodness, you all work together.

The reason why you most likely think aboutt the other girl are because you either feel guilty or thought of "what if"

Honestly, I hate this whole "I seek attention from other people because the one i'm with doesn't give me enough" s**t. It's no excuse for cheating.. I'm not speaking just about you, but the majority of the cheating stem from that reasoning.

To me, I think you should honestly end the relationship. The trust is gone and eventually she'll resent you for it for awhile. She's only stuck by you because you're like what her first love/ boyfriend.

As a boyfriend, you better treat her a lot better than you have now. I'm not just saying that, you need to show her that you only have eyes on her not anyone else. That she's your queen and you are ready to do what it takes to make her happy. Because you ******** up pretty bad.

Yeah, that's what I did last night. I deleted, blocked, removed photos..everything. She was actually the one who persuaded me that all that she wanted was for me to try and work things out with my girlfriend. It doesn't help now that I'm attached emotionally to her and I know after seeing that, I might as well just be single.

And I will respect your words, and don't blame you for feeling that way towards anyone.
She probably wants me around because I am her first love, she's never experienced things with anybody else. She obviously still wants me around, but I can't stand hurting her, especially not anymore than what I just did.

Thanks for opening up my eyes, I just need to be smarter about the decisions I made and think about her more above anybody else.

[Invalid Excuse]

TasteofEnvy

Invalid Excuse

TasteofEnvy

Invalid Excuse

Heartless_Angel_in_me

I just can't believe she forgave you for cheating on her....
You're lucky.
But seriously, be honest with yourself. Do you see yourself cheating on her again in the future? What are you going to do when things get comfy and boring again? If you actually loved her, that wouldn't have mattered in the first place. Are you sure you really want to be with this girl? If you see yourself cheating on her again, please let her go. No one deserves to be cheated on.... ever.

Psychologically speaking, you can't get the girl out of your mind due to two things:
1) Guilty Pleasure. You ******** her. You got away with it. The id (childish side of our personality) is probably thinking "I can get away with it again"
2) Hormones. A lot of hormones are released during sex, often creating a bond (which are sometimes so strong that victims can fall in love with their rapists and couples who hate each other refuse to break up).

If you want to stay with your girlfriend, stay away from this other girl as much as you can. And don't you ever cheat on her again....

Exactly my point. I got lucky, but at the same time..I'm holding to her fragile heart and the fact that she still wants me around. Don't get me wrong, like I stated, if she were to ever break up with me, I'd completely understand.
And yes, I admit. It was guilty pleasure and I have given it to it. And I'm fairly certain I won't be able to do it again because I wouldn't want to put that stress on her.
It just feels wrong that she's trying so hard to keep me around, but at the same time..I want her to know there are better things out there and not to ever settle for a scum like me.

Not gonna lie, it sounds like you're just being with her because you pity her... not because you love her. And it really sounds like you want to break up with her and just don't know how to do it or are afraid she'll be drastic about it. It sounds like you WANT her to realize you're scum and break up with you.

You know what, you're probably right. And that is the point I would have to relay to her.

I really think you should sit down and tell her how you actually feel... even if you have to pull the "I think we should be apart for a while so we can see what we really want" card. You need to do what is best for both of you... and so far a break up sounds like it.

I know she'd break it off with me at that point, but you're right. If I can't even keep myself from falling into temptations, I don't deserve to be in a relationship. I do need to get my sh*t together and hopefully mature from all of this.

[Grimcess]

break up with your girlfriend. she deserves much better than you.

[TasteofEnvy]

Invalid Excuse

TasteofEnvy

Invalid Excuse

TasteofEnvy

Invalid Excuse

Heartless_Angel_in_me

I just can't believe she forgave you for cheating on her....
You're lucky.
But seriously, be honest with yourself. Do you see yourself cheating on her again in the future? What are you going to do when things get comfy and boring again? If you actually loved her, that wouldn't have mattered in the first place. Are you sure you really want to be with this girl? If you see yourself cheating on her again, please let her go. No one deserves to be cheated on.... ever.

Psychologically speaking, you can't get the girl out of your mind due to two things:
1) Guilty Pleasure. You ******** her. You got away with it. The id (childish side of our personality) is probably thinking "I can get away with it again"
2) Hormones. A lot of hormones are released during sex, often creating a bond (which are sometimes so strong that victims can fall in love with their rapists and couples who hate each other refuse to break up).

If you want to stay with your girlfriend, stay away from this other girl as much as you can. And don't you ever cheat on her again....

Exactly my point. I got lucky, but at the same time..I'm holding to her fragile heart and the fact that she still wants me around. Don't get me wrong, like I stated, if she were to ever break up with me, I'd completely understand.
And yes, I admit. It was guilty pleasure and I have given it to it. And I'm fairly certain I won't be able to do it again because I wouldn't want to put that stress on her.
It just feels wrong that she's trying so hard to keep me around, but at the same time..I want her to know there are better things out there and not to ever settle for a scum like me.

Not gonna lie, it sounds like you're just being with her because you pity her... not because you love her. And it really sounds like you want to break up with her and just don't know how to do it or are afraid she'll be drastic about it. It sounds like you WANT her to realize you're scum and break up with you.

You know what, you're probably right. And that is the point I would have to relay to her.

I really think you should sit down and tell her how you actually feel... even if you have to pull the "I think we should be apart for a while so we can see what we really want" card. You need to do what is best for both of you... and so far a break up sounds like it.

I know she'd break it off with me at that point, but you're right. If I can't even keep myself from falling into temptations, I don't deserve to be in a relationship. I do need to get my sh*t together and hopefully mature from all of this.

bingo.
Please follow through with those feelings.