How to tell him I was raped.

[MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp]

Laughing Kookaburra

How the ******** can you have UNPROTECTED SEX with your boyfriend if you were raped?! emotion_facepalm

If I was your boyfriend and found out you risked transmitting HIV to me, I'd dump you straight away.

I seriously hope you're just a troll or I just lost a bit more faith in humanity once again. I feel very sorry for your boyfriend.

First, and I think this goes for most people, I don't think constantly about "oh I could get an STD from this and that, that person has an STD and that person probably does too"

I didn't even think "I have an STD probably" after having been raped. Also, HIV is less than 1% chance of being transmitted through rape. Chlamydia and Gonnorhea are the most likely disease. I knew this guy that raped me, he had steady girlfriends. He wanted me to be a steady girlfriend but I was already with my boyfriend..I think he raped me out of frustration. And it's not like he was punching me in the face during the rape. He had incapacitated me...

Lastly, my boyfriend and I have sex until he comes close then he puts a condom on. Don't give me s**t about "well precum" because you can wait until you've had sex with your boyfried 200+ times and NOT GET PREGNANT. Okay? It's more likely that buttsex will impregnate me than him going in without a condom, then putting one on before he gets close okay?

And he and I have only had sex a few times the past month, quite a bit less than normal. I've been having "my period" and "stressed" etc. I have my good days, where the owrld is fine and I'll pull through, and my bad days, where I feel like s**t over all of this.

Oh, one other note: if I transmitted HIV to my boyfriend, he will not die from it. He's old enough now that "old age" will kill him sooner than AIDS would ever result in his death. I'm not as lucky.

[Shiny SyIveon]

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Don't give me s**t about "well precum" because you can wait until you've had sex with your boyfried 200+ times and NOT GET PREGNANT.

I don't think I said a single word about pregnancy.

And yes, precum does transmit STIs.

You are so ignorant it hurts.

[Relic_League]

Laughing Kookaburra

How can you feel sorry for the boyfriend and not a girl was raped!? I find that disgusting.
Yes she was stupid for haxing sex with her boyfriend after being raped.
But honestly the last thing a rape victim thinks about is having STD's e.t.c.
And havng sex with your boyfriend is something that is a norm to you and secure; a lot of rape victims try to carry on as normal.
I'm not saying it is smart; and sucks for the boyfriend. But the boyfriend can see a doctor and be sorted out. But the poor girl can't just get "fixed" from the trauma of rape.
And how could you dump a partner you love after being raped?
They made a mistake; a dumb one and you'd ditch them knowing they got raped?
I hate to sound like a bully but that's really, really sick.
I hope you only said it out of annoyance due to the girl being so naive.
But I never hear of a rape victim being totally a 100% fine and dandy afterwards. :/

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Tell your boyfriend. If he leaves you; he's not worth it.
Having sex with him was stupid and ignorant; but you were raped; no one thinks straight after that. Get your boyfriend checked; he can easily get himself sorted out.
But your the one who this will follow forever. Get therapy most of all.
Try and tell the police; but a drug drealer is hard enough to catch as is. I had a police women at my door asking for ____ whoever; I had to say no he wasn't here which he wasn't. They're hard to catch and obvioulsy you're scared he could come and hurt you.

People expect rape victims to be these God/Goddess like people; saints. Tell the police, save all the other humans, don't think about yourself at all, stay sane, you're be fine. It's disgusting. It really is vile, just vile. It isn't how it works. They don't understand and they can't understand, you were violated beyond ways they know; you're trust was broken and mentally, emotionally and bodily harmed. A rapist can come back for you; to hurt you or to rape you again; and it's ******** scary as heck I'm sure. Most girls move away from whatever area they were raped in. I've never been raped but...simple to say some scary times and that was bad enough.

So ignore the insensitive people; you messed up but heck people should hate the RAPIST not you! But tell your boyfriend; if he leaves you he's trash anyway. And I'd report it to the police because you can also get a restraining order on the guy. Which means he's less liekly to hurt anyone else or you again. You matter; and you should remember you matter. <3

Don't become another bit of "data" for people to analyze like most do so coldly. :/

[MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp]

Laughing Kookaburra

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Don't give me s**t about "well precum" because you can wait until you've had sex with your boyfried 200+ times and NOT GET PREGNANT.

I don't think I said a single word about pregnancy.

And yes, precum does transmit STIs.

You are so ignorant it hurts.

Let me clarify, yes, precum does transmit STIs. It's unlikely but it is possible. If you notice me saying "NOT GET PREGNANT" you will realize I was saying that you should not give me s**t about having unprotected sex on the pretense of the possibility of getting pregnant, as the only possibly sperm-containing fluid that transfers from him to me is precum. Precum is very very very unlikely to make you pregnant. I know, as a fact and from experience.

Seeing as I had not been with any other guy from since I started my current boyfriend up until I was raped, having unprotected sex up until my guy is getting close and then he puts on a condom is 99% safe. We've never had a condom break or a single pregnancy scare.

You're so presumptuous it hurts. Honestly, you're the kind of presumptuous mindset that perpetuates prejudices.

On a last note, and take this out of the context of my entire post, but ignorance is in no way a sin. So take your head out of your a**.

[Shiny SyIveon]

Kanto_Mint

Laughing Kookaburra

How can you feel sorry for the boyfriend and not a girl was raped!? I find that disgusting.
Yes she was stupid for haxing sex with her boyfriend after being raped.
But honestly the last thing a rape victim thinks about is having STD's e.t.c.
And havng sex with your boyfriend is something that is a norm to you and secure; a lot of rape victims try to carry on as normal.
I'm not saying it is smart; and sucks for the boyfriend. But the boyfriend can see a doctor and be sorted out. But the poor girl can't just get "fixed" from the trauma of rape.
And how could you dump a partner you love after being raped?
They made a mistake; a dumb one and you'd ditch them knowing they got raped?
I hate to sound like a bully but that's really, really sick.
I hope you only said it out of annoyance due to the girl being so naive.
But I never hear of a rape victim being totally a 100% fine and dandy afterwards. :/

Actually STIs would be the FIRST thing to worry about (well, after reporting that a*****e to the police, obviously).
Especially when you care about your partner's health.
The boyfriend can of course see a doctor if it's a "non-serious" STI that can be treated by taking a few meds but not when it is a serious one that might heavily affect his health for years. (e.g. HIV)

When I think of my boyfriend, I cannot even IMAGINE having sex with him without protection if something like rape happened to me.
I would never ever risk his health if it can easily be avoided.

I wouldn't dump him because he got raped, I would dump him for being a reckless, brainless idiot and risking giving me a serious infection.
If he told me he got raped, I would support him as best as I could and never leave him for something like that.


Yes, I left out all the talk of how she shouldn't feel ashamed and report the guy because EVERYONE else already said that, so I didn't feel like repeating the obvious for the 10th time.
But people who are careless with STIs just make me sick and yes, I do get annoyed by reckless behaviour that might put an innocent person's health at risk.

[Shiny SyIveon]

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Laughing Kookaburra

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Don't give me s**t about "well precum" because you can wait until you've had sex with your boyfried 200+ times and NOT GET PREGNANT.

I don't think I said a single word about pregnancy.

And yes, precum does transmit STIs.

You are so ignorant it hurts.

Let me clarify, yes, precum does transmit STIs. It's unlikely but it is possible. If you notice me saying "NOT GET PREGNANT" you will realize I was saying that you should not give me s**t about having unprotected sex on the pretense of the possibility of getting pregnant, as the only possibly sperm-containing fluid that transfers from him to me is precum. Precum is very very very unlikely to make you pregnant. I know, as a fact and from experience.

Seeing as I had not been with any other guy from since I started my current boyfriend up until I was raped, having unprotected sex up until my guy is getting close and then he puts on a condom is 99% safe. We've never had a condom break or a single pregnancy scare.

You're so presumptuous it hurts. Honestly, you're the kind of presumptuous mindset that perpetuates prejudices.

On a last note, and take this out of the context of my entire post, but ignorance is in no way a sin. So take your head out of your a**.

Again you are talking about pregnancy for no apparent reason.

I was saying you were an idiot for risking your boyfriend's HEALTH and that is a fact.

[Relic_League]

Laughing Kookaburra

Actually the last thing on my mind would be STI's after being raped.
(After a while but not for a while no.)
But then I wouldn't want sex after rape; so my partner wouldn't be in danger.

Namely because I'd be considering:
Tell the police yes/no.
Ttell my family yes/no; tell my partner yes but how.
How to keep away from said rapist.
Telling the police would that cause him to rape me again yes/no.
A lot more things than that. Because being traumatized. o-o

I would of thought being raped would cause someone to be stupid and brainless; trauma does tend to do that to a person. And I doubt you have ever not done something brainless, reckless e.t.c. Everyone has were human.

Though we can say what we would/wouldn't do but less we get raped heaven forbid we wont ever know how we'll react.

No she shouldn't be careless about STIs but she was raped.
You should hate the rapist not her.

I'd be angry/pissed off/furious with my partner (male) if he had sex with me after being raped due to obvious chance of STI.

But I would remember...for ******** hell sake he was raped! I'd get myself checked by a doctor a.s.a.p of course; let him know it was stupid, brainless and reckless. But once I got checked by a doctor my partner before and after would be my main focus. And I wouldn't dump them for making a mistake; after what they'd been through.

[Shiny SyIveon]

Kanto_Mint

Laughing Kookaburra

Actually the last thing on my mind would be STI's after being raped.
(After a while but not for a while no.)
But then I wouldn't want sex after rape; so my partner wouldn't be in danger.

Namely because I'd be considering:
Tell the police yes/no.
Ttell my family yes/no; tell my partner yes but how.
How to keep away from said rapist.
Telling the police would that cause him to rape me again yes/no.
A lot more things than that. Because being traumatized. o-o

I would of thought being raped would cause someone to be stupid and brainless; trauma does tend to do that to a person. And I doubt you have ever not done something brainless, reckless e.t.c. Everyone has were human.

Though we can say what we would/wouldn't do but less we get raped heaven forbid we wont ever know how we'll react.

No she shouldn't be careless about STIs but she was raped.
You should hate the rapist not her.

I'd be angry/pissed off/furious with my partner (male) if he had sex with me after being raped due to obvious chance of STI.

But I would remember...for ******** hell sake he was raped! I'd get myself checked by a doctor a.s.a.p of course; let him know it was stupid, brainless and reckless. But once I got checked by a doctor my partner before and after would be my main focus. And I wouldn't dump them for making a mistake; after what they'd been through.

Well, I never said that I have never been raped... so yeah. neutral

Maybe breaking up immediately would be a bit harsh but I won't change my mind about the idiocy of the whole thing.
Rape is a horrible thing and so on and so on but it doesn't turn off your brain so I don't see it as an excuse at all. I also never said I "hate her".... what happened to her sucks a lot and that guy is obviously an a*****e but like I said, especially in that situation you should always try to act as smart as you can.

[MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp]

Laughing Kookaburra

Kanto_Mint

Laughing Kookaburra

How can you feel sorry for the boyfriend and not a girl was raped!? I find that disgusting.
Yes she was stupid for haxing sex with her boyfriend after being raped.
But honestly the last thing a rape victim thinks about is having STD's e.t.c.
And havng sex with your boyfriend is something that is a norm to you and secure; a lot of rape victims try to carry on as normal.
I'm not saying it is smart; and sucks for the boyfriend. But the boyfriend can see a doctor and be sorted out. But the poor girl can't just get "fixed" from the trauma of rape.
And how could you dump a partner you love after being raped?
They made a mistake; a dumb one and you'd ditch them knowing they got raped?
I hate to sound like a bully but that's really, really sick.
I hope you only said it out of annoyance due to the girl being so naive.
But I never hear of a rape victim being totally a 100% fine and dandy afterwards. :/

Actually STIs would be the FIRST thing to worry about (well, after reporting that a*****e to the police, obviously).
Especially when you care about your partner's health.
The boyfriend can of course see a doctor if it's a "non-serious" STI that can be treated by taking a few meds but not when it is a serious one that might heavily affect his health for years. (e.g. HIV)

When I think of my boyfriend, I cannot even IMAGINE having sex with him without protection if something like rape happened to me.
I would never ever risk his health if it can easily be avoided.

I wouldn't dump him because he got raped, I would dump him for being a reckless, brainless idiot and risking giving me a serious infection.
If he told me he got raped, I would support him as best as I could and never leave him for something like that.


Yes, I left out all the talk of how she shouldn't feel ashamed and report the guy because EVERYONE else already said that, so I didn't feel like repeating the obvious for the 10th time.
But people who are careless with STIs just make me sick and yes, I do get annoyed by reckless behaviour that might put an innocent person's health at risk.

You've never been raped. Ever. You don't know what it's like, and you certainly don't know what goes on in a victims head first thing.

Believe me I wish my first thought was "get tested." I wish I had thought of a few things like that but, I don't mean to speak for all rape victims but I think I speak for a sizable portion when I say that, after being sexually assaulted it's so much different from what you hear in sexual assault PSAs etc.

It's so much different. It feels way different. I thought I would be crying, I would be dysfunctional and unable to get on with life. It's different.

I've gone through this once before, only it was my ex-boyfriend and it didn't hurt, but it was scary and it was a different experience that I am over now.

Honestly, you remind me of someone I used to know. I was talking to him about eating disorders, and he said "man, i wish i was anorexic. Then I could just eat all the s**t I want so im no longer underweight. That would be awesome."


Point being, you've never been raped and you obviously dont understand what its like, those first few days after being sxually assaulted (or raped.) You don't know what it's like to go to school, go to work, go to bed, cry and laugh, frown and smile, eat and drink after beng raped.

[Shiny SyIveon]

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Laughing Kookaburra

Kanto_Mint

Laughing Kookaburra

How can you feel sorry for the boyfriend and not a girl was raped!? I find that disgusting.
Yes she was stupid for haxing sex with her boyfriend after being raped.
But honestly the last thing a rape victim thinks about is having STD's e.t.c.
And havng sex with your boyfriend is something that is a norm to you and secure; a lot of rape victims try to carry on as normal.
I'm not saying it is smart; and sucks for the boyfriend. But the boyfriend can see a doctor and be sorted out. But the poor girl can't just get "fixed" from the trauma of rape.
And how could you dump a partner you love after being raped?
They made a mistake; a dumb one and you'd ditch them knowing they got raped?
I hate to sound like a bully but that's really, really sick.
I hope you only said it out of annoyance due to the girl being so naive.
But I never hear of a rape victim being totally a 100% fine and dandy afterwards. :/

Actually STIs would be the FIRST thing to worry about (well, after reporting that a*****e to the police, obviously).
Especially when you care about your partner's health.
The boyfriend can of course see a doctor if it's a "non-serious" STI that can be treated by taking a few meds but not when it is a serious one that might heavily affect his health for years. (e.g. HIV)

When I think of my boyfriend, I cannot even IMAGINE having sex with him without protection if something like rape happened to me.
I would never ever risk his health if it can easily be avoided.

I wouldn't dump him because he got raped, I would dump him for being a reckless, brainless idiot and risking giving me a serious infection.
If he told me he got raped, I would support him as best as I could and never leave him for something like that.


Yes, I left out all the talk of how she shouldn't feel ashamed and report the guy because EVERYONE else already said that, so I didn't feel like repeating the obvious for the 10th time.
But people who are careless with STIs just make me sick and yes, I do get annoyed by reckless behaviour that might put an innocent person's health at risk.

You've never been raped. Ever. You don't know what it's like, and you certainly don't know what goes on in a victims head first thing.

Believe me I wish my first thought was "get tested." I wish I had thought of a few things like that but, I don't mean to speak for all rape victims but I think I speak for a sizable portion when I say that, after being sexually assaulted it's so much different from what you hear in sexual assault PSAs etc.

It's so much different. It feels way different. I thought I would be crying, I would be dysfunctional and unable to get on with life. It's different.

I've gone through this once before, only it was my ex-boyfriend and it didn't hurt, but it was scary and it was a different experience that I am over now.

Honestly, you remind me of someone I used to know. I was talking to him about eating disorders, and he said "man, i wish i was anorexic. Then I could just eat all the s**t I want so im no longer underweight. That would be awesome."


Point being, you've never been raped and you obviously dont understand what its like, those first few days after being sxually assaulted (or raped.) You don't know what it's like to go to school, go to work, go to bed, cry and laugh, frown and smile, eat and drink after beng raped.

Didn't you just complain that I was presumptuous?

You think YOU know if I have ever been raped? rofl

[Relic_League]

Laughing Kookaburra

I find it rude to ask people such personal questions. Also I try not to assume anything about a stranger; since I find doing that rude also. So I suppose I just do it because I try to be polite to everyone.

Oh the idiocy of the whole thing is completely correct and I agree on that completely.

I just didn't understand how you could dump someone for it after what they'd been through and the fact everyone makes mistakes.

I didn't mean you "hater her" as per say but you only put her in a negative light and not the rapist. (Until now.) Which gives that view I suppose.

I agree you should try and act as smart as you can; but I suppose psychologically we don't.
No it doesn't turn off our brains but it does make it easier to lack good judgement e.t.c.
Since trauma has been proven to effect ones brain process; or so I was taught in college.
It is very sad what happened and I agree with you she should tell the police; but of course calling the police means having to be around the rapist if a court case comes up and the fear of being in harms way again. Plus if the jury can't reach a verdict; you have to go back and go through it all over again. :/ So the police option though the most saint option; isn't an easy choice.

[Shiny SyIveon]

Kanto_Mint

Laughing Kookaburra

I find it rude to ask people such personal questions. Also I try not to assume anything about a stranger; since I find doing that rude also. So I suppose I just do it because I try to be polite to everyone.

Oh the idiocy of the whole thing is completely correct and I agree on that completely.

I just didn't understand how you could dump someone for it after what they'd been through and the fact everyone makes mistakes.

I didn't mean you "hater her" as per say but you only put her in a negative light and not the rapist. (Until now.) Which gives that view I suppose.

I agree you should try and act as smart as you can; but I suppose psychologically we don't.
No it doesn't turn off our brains but it does make it easier to lack good judgement e.t.c.
Since trauma has been proven to effect ones brain process; or so I was taught in college.
It is very sad what happened and I agree with you she should tell the police; but of course calling the police means having to be around the rapist if a court case comes up and the fear of being in harms way again. Plus if the jury can't reach a verdict; you have to go back and go through it all over again. :/ So the police option though the most saint option; isn't an easy choice.

Like I said, it is obvious that it is the guy's fault, not her's so I didn't want to repeat it.

And I have been in a similar situation, I cannot imagine not reporting it.
There is no benefit. I'd always prefer the guy to get punished, even if it means being around him again.
I would NEVER let a rapist get away with it.

But I guess to each their own.

[MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp]

Laughing Kookaburra

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Laughing Kookaburra

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Don't give me s**t about "well precum" because you can wait until you've had sex with your boyfried 200+ times and NOT GET PREGNANT.

I don't think I said a single word about pregnancy.

And yes, precum does transmit STIs.

You are so ignorant it hurts.

Let me clarify, yes, precum does transmit STIs. It's unlikely but it is possible. If you notice me saying "NOT GET PREGNANT" you will realize I was saying that you should not give me s**t about having unprotected sex on the pretense of the possibility of getting pregnant, as the only possibly sperm-containing fluid that transfers from him to me is precum. Precum is very very very unlikely to make you pregnant. I know, as a fact and from experience.

Seeing as I had not been with any other guy from since I started my current boyfriend up until I was raped, having unprotected sex up until my guy is getting close and then he puts on a condom is 99% safe. We've never had a condom break or a single pregnancy scare.

You're so presumptuous it hurts. Honestly, you're the kind of presumptuous mindset that perpetuates prejudices.

On a last note, and take this out of the context of my entire post, but ignorance is in no way a sin. So take your head out of your a**.

Again you are talking about pregnancy for no apparent reason.

I was saying you were an idiot for risking your boyfriend's HEALTH and that is a fact.

Okay, there is exactly ONE reason why I would use condoms with my boyfriend before I got raped. So I don't get pregnant. If we used condoms from the beginning of sexual intercourse to the end, this would not be an issue but do you think I had the foresight to think "hmm, i should make sure from the beginning of our sexual relationship I will have my boyfriend wear a condom the entire time on the off chance that I magically get an STD?. No. I didn't

I didn't think about STDs immediately after being raped. I froze after being raped. My mind shut off and I went into auto-pilot. I felt numb and yet I cried. I thought about moving on, about forgetting that it happenend.

Also your opinion, that I'm an "idiot," is not a fact. It's an opinion. And your opinion is false because I live away from home to go to a great college etc etc. And I'm aware it's the internet and I could say "I was born a child genius and went to Harvard at age 15" but frankly it's not worth my effort to lie or to scan my 'credentials' for some flamer who has no perception beyond her 2 foot personal bubble.

And maybe you should stray away from personal vilifications, seeing as someone who makes a good persuasive argument goes beyond "yeah well you're STOOOPIDDDD."

You can leave the thread now since you're no longer contributing s**t.

kthxbai

[Relic_League]

Laughing Kookaburra

I agree it was all the guys fault; I just meant people might of read it the wrong way was all. (:

I suppose each to their own. Honestly I'd want to report him; but I can honestly admit it wouldn't be the first thing I did. I'd tell my partner first I imagine and go from there. I can't honestly say I would tell my family. I like to think everyone will report a rapist; but if it is the argument of "she said, he said" you naturally feel like you have no chance. Like why men don't report rape; it is more likely to ruin their life than make it better. :/ It is a sad thing about society while people expect you to tell the police some of the same people then look badly on you for it. (Not you but I've seen it happen.)

[Shiny SyIveon]

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Laughing Kookaburra

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Laughing Kookaburra

MuleDerpMuleHerpDerp

Don't give me s**t about "well precum" because you can wait until you've had sex with your boyfried 200+ times and NOT GET PREGNANT.

I don't think I said a single word about pregnancy.

And yes, precum does transmit STIs.

You are so ignorant it hurts.

Let me clarify, yes, precum does transmit STIs. It's unlikely but it is possible. If you notice me saying "NOT GET PREGNANT" you will realize I was saying that you should not give me s**t about having unprotected sex on the pretense of the possibility of getting pregnant, as the only possibly sperm-containing fluid that transfers from him to me is precum. Precum is very very very unlikely to make you pregnant. I know, as a fact and from experience.

Seeing as I had not been with any other guy from since I started my current boyfriend up until I was raped, having unprotected sex up until my guy is getting close and then he puts on a condom is 99% safe. We've never had a condom break or a single pregnancy scare.

You're so presumptuous it hurts. Honestly, you're the kind of presumptuous mindset that perpetuates prejudices.

On a last note, and take this out of the context of my entire post, but ignorance is in no way a sin. So take your head out of your a**.

Again you are talking about pregnancy for no apparent reason.

I was saying you were an idiot for risking your boyfriend's HEALTH and that is a fact.

Okay, there is exactly ONE reason why I would use condoms with my boyfriend before I got raped. So I don't get pregnant. If we used condoms from the beginning of sexual intercourse to the end, this would not be an issue but do you think I had the foresight to think "hmm, i should make sure from the beginning of our sexual relationship I will have my boyfriend wear a condom the entire time on the off chance that I magically get an STD?. No. I didn't

I didn't think about STDs immediately after being raped. I froze after being raped. My mind shut off and I went into auto-pilot. I felt numb and yet I cried. I thought about moving on, about forgetting that it happenend.

Also your opinion, that I'm an "idiot," is not a fact. It's an opinion. And your opinion is false because I live away from home to go to a great college etc etc. And I'm aware it's the internet and I could say "I was born a child genius and went to Harvard at age 15" but frankly it's not worth my effort to lie or to scan my 'credentials' for some flamer who has no perception beyond her 2 foot personal bubble.

And maybe you should stray away from personal vilifications, seeing as someone who makes a good persuasive argument goes beyond "yeah well you're STOOOPIDDDD."

You can leave the thread now since you're no longer contributing s**t.

kthxbai

I think you lack some reading and comprehension skills.



xd Making a troll rage is pretty funny, though.