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Hey guys, I'm really sorry if this is in the wrong forum.. but hear me out?

So, I basically have this elementary school friend that I've known all my life, we went to elementary school together, middle school and high school; I'm currently a senior in high school. That's beside the point, so the other day I messaged him on facebook randomly and we started talking, and boy did I enjoy talking to him. He's super intelligent, and very intellectual. He's so open minded, and a bit quirky but that's what I like about him.

He's never had a girlfriend, at least that's what I know of, and can be a bit awkward to other people. I don't know, he's so mature just for 17, so I guess it freaks people out? I don't know, but he kind of keeps to himself or his friends when they're around. He's super sweet, and super kind and caring, I can just get this vibe from him.

I really want to get to know him and be friends with him before anything, I really do. We talked on Sunday and haven't talked since; he hasn't initiated conversation, which is kind of bothering me, I just have this sudden want to talk to him, I feel like I have a connection with him that I've never experienced with someone before. I want to get to know his likes, his dislikes, his family life, I just really want to get to know him, and be able to reciprocate with him as well..

But, I don't know how to do this, everytime we chat online I have to initiate conversation. When we talked on Sunday, I forgot to reply to his message that he sent back to me after I said "Hi" and he admitted to me that he thought about why I didn't reply back to him when he sent the message, and felt bad. He admitted to me that he's an overthinker. I really don't know what to think of this, but I just think he's cute, and all of his quirks are super cute.


In person, we don't really talk, he's in one of my classes but I get so nervous to talk to him because I'm scared I might say the wrong thing, I know he wouldn't judge me for it whatsoever, but I get scared about thinking about what to talk about and how to be comfortable..

I don't know, what should I do?

Chatty Smoker

I know it sounds lame, but be yourself. If you say something stupid and he judges you, then he's not for you. You need someone who accepts you for any flaws you may have, you know?

Anyway, I would just continue conversation on Facebook. Look at his interests in Facebook and start a convo about your shared ones. Maybe make small talk in class (ex. What did you think about that test? Did you do the homework? What are you writing your paper on? etc.)

But yeah. Be yourself. If he judges you or gets annoyed or anything then he's not for you.
brunette_barbie_x0xo
I know it sounds lame, but be yourself. If you say something stupid and he judges you, then he's not for you. You need someone who accepts you for any flaws you may have, you know?

Anyway, I would just continue conversation on Facebook. Look at his interests in Facebook and start a convo about your shared ones. Maybe make small talk in class (ex. What did you think about that test? Did you do the homework? What are you writing your paper on? etc.)

But yeah. Be yourself. If he judges you or gets annoyed or anything then he's not for you.
I'm just scared I'll get annoying. But the thing is, when I would go on twitter and tweet something he used to always reply to it and say something hella random & funny, like constantly. So.. I don't know if I'll get annoying to him.

Chatty Smoker

Trojan.Freenudegirls.A
brunette_barbie_x0xo
I know it sounds lame, but be yourself. If you say something stupid and he judges you, then he's not for you. You need someone who accepts you for any flaws you may have, you know?

Anyway, I would just continue conversation on Facebook. Look at his interests in Facebook and start a convo about your shared ones. Maybe make small talk in class (ex. What did you think about that test? Did you do the homework? What are you writing your paper on? etc.)

But yeah. Be yourself. If he judges you or gets annoyed or anything then he's not for you.
I'm just scared I'll get annoying. But the thing is, when I would go on twitter and tweet something he used to always reply to it and say something hella random & funny, like constantly. So.. I don't know if I'll get annoying to him.

You shouldn't be annoying to him unless you're obviously being really clingy (sending double texts if he doesn't answer right away, constantly ask invasive questions, try talking to him 24/7 even if he doesn't respond, etc.). So if you're just being yourself and you're not up his a**, you should be okay! biggrin

Hopping Lunatic

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You sound so cute!!

I agree with Brunette Barbie, though.
Just be yourself.

After all, you don't want a friendship, let alone a relationship, where you feel scared to say the wrong thing.

You can always invite him to the library to study together?
In high school, and even university, I would organise a group of friends (kind of like in Community) and we'd study together. Sometimes we would have different subjects to study, but it wouldn't matter. We'd be together and motivate each other.
Anyway, I always found that studying was a good way to get to know someone. Awkward silences are alright, since it's assumed you'd be studying, and it's easy to find stuff to talk about!

Good luck (:

Tipsy Tipper

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Just a guy's instinct, but I'm pretty sure he is waiting for you to give him more definite signs that you like him. I would suggest initiating regular conversations with him in person more over texting or facebook. You don't want to make the relationship/friendship to become strictly electronic, which is often something that happens and can become a problem.

Just talk to him in person often, but don't be afraid to message him or text him either. Just be straight up with guys. That is how we operate... Most of the time.

Shirtless Lunatic

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I oddly have somewhat of have a similar personality to the person you're talking about, so I think I may be able to help you out here! ^_^

As said before, be yourself! Try to show that you're interest in just being friends at first. Since he's in your classes I would suggest asking him to help you with homework, or use school as an excuse to talk to him. When you start a conversation about school just get side tracked. I've been approached by girls many times and the ones that stick out to me are the ones that seem like good people, so show him how kind and caring you are. If he opens up to you about his personal life, show interest but don't try to dig too deep because that might seem a little creepy. Good luck! blaugh

Oh! And a little side note, when you guys are comfortable with each other in real life, give him pretty obvious hints. Guys are horrible at detecting them. If you notice him giving you hints, you might want to consider making the first move. Believe it or not, guys like to asked out too xD

Hygienic Streaker

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1. From personal experience overthinkers can be scary territory. Not that I haven't seen them work out with other people, but sometimes they guilt trip you if you forget to respond or accidentally say something rude or word things wrongly. If you're okay with that than great! Proceed to step two!

2. The surefire way to get comfortable around him is to keep trying to hang out. When I meet someone new I'm usually a little uncomfortable around them and may not talk much face to face which sounds like what you two may be like. If you guys hang out more you'll get more at ease with each other and the conversation will flow normally. If it doesn't, at least you'll know.

3. If he's giving you long responses he may just not know how to approach talking to you, especially since he's never had a girlfriend before.

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