x_pitpat_x
(?)Community Member
- Posted: Tue, 27 Jan 2015 10:27:03 +0000
I want to not be in a relationship...I love him a lot..really I do..we been dateing for a year now, its all good and every thing,but I just want to go off and do my own thing....and I feel horrible about breaking up cuse hes a good guy and I love him and he loves me...but I feel like I cant put my self in this relationship at 100%...I get distant with him at times...ive kinda talked to him befor about it .....he told me either we r together or we r not..i don't want no back and forth s**t... and I get that..i understand...but I hate feel like im in the relationship cuse im afraid of losing him...im not close to veary many ppl.so I hard core freak out in my head/body..when I feel like im gona lose some one forever,...but i want live my life and break free from the bubble that i slow been breaking free of befor i met him...i feel like i sometimes put my lfe on hold cuse i don't want to lose or hurt him....(my longest relationship consecutively with out breaking up is 5months ...so me being with him for a year kinda freaks me out a bit as well cuse im feeling like im not really ready to settle down with some one...)...hes been their done that with a lot of things but for me every thing is like a kid in a toy store .. just don't know how to tell him with out loseing him or what.. crying crying crying ... i know i gota just not be a pus and do it...cuse i feel like it not fare to him if im not in to the relationship as he is...it sucks cuse its nothing that hes doing is wrong really....its mainly me.. .my nerves r telling me don't do it...bu tmy heart says theirs a world u need to c ...........ug cry