CAUGHT RED HANDED-----MANY A TIME...19 YR OLD??

[Mittens188]

Hey all
I have a friend who always lies. She will tell me 1 thing and then even when im standing right next to her she will say another to somebody else. Im really getting fed up as she only does it to get attention. I dont know how to approch her about this.

Also another friend is 14 and she is going out with a guy she met through a friend. The guy lives near by. All well and good. BUT HE IS 19 YEARS OLD............I think she is too young 4 him.....ecpecially because she says she has been in his car!!!! Im scared this guy will use her or pressure her into sex.

What should I do about both of these Predicaments
thanx
Mittens

[Gossamer Heart]

Problem:

1) One of my friend's used to do this. We stopped her by telling her we knew she was lying, giving her examples of the lies she had told and telling her that if you continued to lie, she peobably wouldn't have many friend's left to lie too.

2) I understand how you feel, but it really is her choice. Telling her that you think it's a bad idea that she date him could lead to a few things. Her starting to think you're jealous or causing her to rebel by doing things with him...Give the guy a chance, he might be one of the rare half-decent ones.

[Oxygene]

Well, your lying friend first. I think the best thing you can do, is to sit down in a quiet place, just the two of you, and talk with her. Does she do it in purpose, or is she confused? Tell her she can't lie all the time, people won't trust her then.

And your other friend. I don't think it's wrong beeing with someone that much older, but it is wrong if he forces her to do things she may not dare to deny him. By the way, what is the sexual limit (in age) in the USA? 16 here. She should wait until she is ready developed. It's ok to have a soo much older boyfriend as long as he doesn't force you to do things, and as long as you got some common sence yourself.

[ToonakiNinJaShoE]

Mittens188

Hey all
I have a friend who always lies. She will tell me 1 thing and then even when im standing right next to her she will say another to somebody else. Im really getting fed up as she only does it to get attention. I dont know how to approch her about this.

Also another friend is 14 and she is going out with a guy she met through a friend. The guy lives near by. All well and good. BUT HE IS 19 YEARS OLD............I think she is too young 4 him.....ecpecially because she says she has been in his car!!!! Im scared this guy will use her or pressure her into sex.

What should I do about both of these Predicaments
thanx
Mittens

If theres anymore then a 2 year barrior then its wrong, Kick his a** or convince her to stop and come to her sences

[Tessitore]

Mittens188

Hey all
I have a friend who always lies. She will tell me 1 thing and then even when im standing right next to her she will say another to somebody else. Im really getting fed up as she only does it to get attention. I dont know how to approch her about this.

Also another friend is 14 and she is going out with a guy she met through a friend. The guy lives near by. All well and good. BUT HE IS 19 YEARS OLD............I think she is too young 4 him.....ecpecially because she says she has been in his car!!!! Im scared this guy will use her or pressure her into sex.

What should I do about both of these Predicaments
thanx
Mittens

Okay, first thing's first; the friend:

-Some friends do not realize what they're doing when they do it. This two-faced thing that she's pulling can be A) the way she was raised or B) something she's doing as a "joke" or a "prank" or she just finds amusing in particular or C) she doesn't realize what she's doing when she's doing it. I.E.--She's a dumb-***

I suggest talking to her about it and solving the issue peacefully.

Second addressee; the 14-and-19-year-olds:

-She's driving in his car. Whoop-dee-do. If I was 14 and had a boyfriend that drove I'd so be hitching rides all the friggen time. You betcha. And the sex thing... talk to your friend. Some people (like moi) have sexual appetities arrise when they are MUCH younger then a lot of people. If she is uncomfortable with the idea of sex then, yes, I think you should intervene because (honestly) that's the ONLY thing on a boys mind at this age. But if she's really gung-ho for it; leave her alone. Just remind her to be safe. Use a condom. All that jazz.

Honestly, I don't think it's any of your business what mistakes your friend does/doesn't make.

[Tightrope Trigger]

first of all, you barely know the guy. get to know him before you judge on his sexual advances. I know hes older then her but that might not be his intention. I'm with someone the exact amouth of years older then me, and I met him when I was 14 and he was 19 o.O;; hes not after sex though. He might've given her a ride home or something.

as for the friend who lies, forget her. tell her to screw off and that you dont want to talk to her anymore.

[Vinyasa]

console your friend with the lying or short-attention-span-problem.

warn your friend about that dating thing, but don't try to prevent it completely.

[Tailix]

Make a lie back about your mate

[Four leaf Shamrock]

About your friend and who shes dating, I think hes just taking advantage and will probably force some stuff upon her. Plus it totally breaks the 2 year rule (do not go out with anyone 2 yrs older/younger than you, it's gross) I'm 14 now, and would never date a 19 year old adult.

[x_x silent killer x_x]

first of all.. there is no two year rule! second I know alot of people who have great lives and have been togather for along time and are 5 years apart.. also some people who are seven years! So I wouldnt get into it.. i know you want to do something..

[DarkAvengess]

well, concerning the first problem, you should try to confrunt her about it and tell her you know that she is lying. . if she denies it, then I would get together with another friend that was told a different lie and then both you you could tell her that you know she is lying. . tell her that you don't trust her anymore. . . she will probably want to make it up to you if she values your friendship. . tell her just to stop lying. .

About the friend. . well, it all depends on how old she is mentally, and how old he is mentally. . . if they are in a serious relationship where they understand and care about each other I would let it be. . this probably is not the case, so if not, I would try to talk to her. .. but remember that if you try to push her to do something she will just stop listening to you,you will beocme the bad person. . she just might have to make her own mistakes. . .

[Miyuki_Sohma]

well about the jfirst proble i think that that girl needs to sort out her storys and keep them strait (i lie a lot but i keep them strait) and if you dont like it i think the bast was is to just be up front about it

the other one i think she is way to young what u need to do is tell somebody cuz if they are haveing sex that is satitory rape and he can get in HUGE trouble

[dark shadow2]

Mittens188

Hey all
I have a friend who always lies. She will tell me 1 thing and then even when im standing right next to her she will say another to somebody else. Im really getting fed up as she only does it to get attention. I dont know how to approch her about this.

Also another friend is 14 and she is going out with a guy she met through a friend. The guy lives near by. All well and good. BUT HE IS 19 YEARS OLD............I think she is too young 4 him.....ecpecially because she says she has been in his car!!!! Im scared this guy will use her or pressure her into sex.

What should I do about both of these Predicaments
thanx
Mittens

if a friend lies to you they no good. as for ur other friend... Not all guys are going to put pressures on someone for sex. So get to know the guy urself and if he is like that stay away from him

[[ J a d e . D r a c o s ]]

1. I wouldn't personally say anything because it could ruin your friendship, but when she says something to someone else when she just told you otherwise... slyly say "oh thats not what you told me"

2. Don't expect that every guy older than your friend is gonna lure her into bed. Have some faith in your friend.

[Sensedog]

1.) If talking to her does not help, then you need a better friend in your life.

2.) Allow your friend to learn her own lesson through her own mistakes.