Am I really in the wrong here?

[FlyingNakedMan]

I just feel like my sister used her I'm a teen mom, so you should be proud of me for choosing this decision to much. I'm just so confused nowadays. I mean we got in a straight up fist fight where I went to Juvi, because I just thought she was going over board with her Teen Mom crap, I just couldn't handle it anymore. These are just some examples of her behavior recently.

I had asked her personally that I would not take care of her child since I got surgery on my knee this Thursday, so I wanted her to find someone, I told her this a week in advance, so I don't think I put a lot of pressure on her, and she told me that she'd ask our dad, since she's living with him at the moment, and I was okay. She never asked him, the day come, and my dad was like "Wait who's going to take care of the baby, YOU KNOW you're sister can't do it." She just looked at my dad and said, "You're doing it", and they got in an argument about how she should've asked, and why hadn't she prepared any meals for the child, if she was just going to do that to him. She said that my dad should be HAPPY to help her because, she's A TEEN MOM. Is this right, does my dad have to help her, like is my dad just morally wrong for wanting to know for advance?

My sister gets food stamps but they cut the amount she used to get, so my dad now asks her to pay atleast 50 bucks of her own money to help with the grocery and let me tell you, she doesn't pay bills of any sorts, and she still has the balls to pretty much yell at my dad saying that he SHOULD GO GET A JOB, which I won't lie, he should, but he's a carpenter, and no one wants a carpenter, he's trying though, you have to give him that. Yet, when he tells her that he's living under his roof and she should pay something for living under this house, her excuse, I'M A TEEN MOM, NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME". I can't help but get annoyed. She doesn't want to spend 100 dollars on groceries, but she CAN spend 100 dollar on a coach purse, because it's "pretty" I can't buy it any longer. She waste 60-80 bucks on lotions that help her remove her stretch marks too. Is it wrong that I get mad, that she doesn't want to help my dad pay the bills.

Then there is a little old lady and her husband that take care of her kid, and they are taking care of their nephews, so, yes they get food stamps too, and my sister and dad found out that if they could get her to sign some papers they could get more food stamps from her, but the old lady would lose some of her food stamps, but she might even lose her health insurance, I personally think that's where the line should be drawn, and I told her, "She takes care of three kids, you only have one!" and all my sister did was yell, "I'M A TEEN MOM I NEED IT MORE!", and I wanted to yell, "YOU'RE A STUPID ******** b***h, YOU'RE LIVING OFF OF OUR DAD, HE PAYS THE BILLS, THOSE LITTLE OLD PEOPLE PAY THEIR OWN BILLS, THEY DON'T HAVE CABLE, THEY'RE TO POOR TO USE THEIR A/C AND YOU HAVE THE BALLS TO SAY YOU NEED IT MORE!", but instead I just left, because she just sounded so selfish.

Ugh I don't know anymore, :/ Does being a teen mom condemn this behavior, I just don' even know anymore. I just want to tell my dad to make her start paying rent, or something, since I feel like she's getting the easy life. She's always mad that my dad doesn't wan to take care of the baby for free so that she can go to college, and all this junk :/

[Ayyuko]

Your sister's making up excuses.
She's the one who got pregnant with the kid, she needs to step it up and help more. It's HER kid.
So, no, you're not in the wrong.

[Kaname_Is_Here]

Your sister sounds like a d**k. She's USING her kid to get stuff for herself!
It's people like that, that makes teen mum's look like s**t!

You need to tell your dad to harden up! She's taking advantage of everyone! And completely taking the piss.
She isn't in dire need of these food stamps, she probs gets enough benefits to feed her child without them! PLUS she should be GRATEFUL she's getting however much food stamps! Considering they're FREE!!!!


If she was responsible enough to have sex and have a child, then she should deal with the consequences and stop being so damn selfish!
She needs to stop being given stuff! Like your dad, yeah he should get a job, whatever, it's good he's trying!
TELL HIM to stop being such a p***y and stand up to this little brat of a sister you've got.

GOD People like that make me so angry! Punch her in the face will you!!!!! evil evil evil evil scream stressed

[Mameoyashi]

You got into a fist fight? Unless you were using that force only to get away then yeah you were in the wrong there. Annoying or not, striking someone outside of self-defense is never appropriate. (That goes for her striking you as well, mind you, but that doesn't mean you were right for hitting or hitting back, whatever the case was).

The altercation between her and your father is between her and your father. Stay out of it. It's not wrong that you get frustrated, she does sound somewhat selfish. But honestly, that part is between your dad and her. You need to just stay out of that fight until it is over with.

Not having her father help out for free when she is trying to take college classes is another thing though. College and a baby is hard to manage and honestly she should be getting *some* support there from your dad. However the trade off would be helping rent (when she can) and paying for him (or someone else) to baby-sit when she's not taking courses (and to assure this he can help her with her schedule-making so he *knows* when he has courses).

If she wants people to help, she does need to start contributing.

However this is your father's battle. You can support him, but he's the head of the household, he's the parent, he's the one who has to make the final decision (which would be if she's really not contributing and if she's of age which she's going to college so she's... hat 17-18?] he can kick her out of the house).

I had a brother in a similar position. Not pregnant or with a child, but selfish and entitled as ******** and was always acting out against the family. Honestly, you just learn to let your parents deal with it. All you do if you step in the way will be cause things to escalate. It's tough, it's annoying. Just count the days until you can get out of there or until your father kicks her out. You need to support your father in his decisions as house-owner and authority figure, but that's all you can really do.

[FlyingNakedMan]

Mameoyashi

You got into a fist fight? Unless you were using that force only to get away then yeah you were in the wrong there. Annoying or not, striking someone outside of self-defense is never appropriate. (That goes for her striking you as well, mind you, but that doesn't mean you were right for hitting or hitting back, whatever the case was).

really do.

No, I had told her not to leave me with the child, but what did she do, she ditched the child in my room and was leaving the house .___., so I had enough since this was the third time that month, where she had just jumped out of her window to leave or said ******** you, can't do anything about it and left me with the child. So I had it, she didn't want to listen to when I told her that we had agreed that on thursday I did not watch the child, and still had the balls to say well you're his aunt, you need to help me, No. I wouldn't sit there and take it, ever since that fight she actually doesn't do that anymore, since the Police were on my side and she was stuck in jail for about 4 days while I was only in the holding for a day and nothing happened to me, she's the one that got anger management and everything thrown at her.

[Mameoyashi]

FlyingNakedMan

No, I had told her not to leave me with the child, but what did she do, she ditched the child in my room and was leaving the house .___., so I had enough since this was the third time that month, where she had just jumped out of her window to leave or said ******** you, can't do anything about it and left me with the child. So I had it, she didn't want to listen to when I told her that we had agreed that on thursday I did not watch the child, and still had the balls to say well you're his aunt, you need to help me, No. I wouldn't sit there and take it, ever since that fight she actually doesn't do that anymore, since the Police were on my side and she was stuck in jail for about 4 days while I was only in the holding for a day and nothing happened to me, she's the one that got anger management and everything thrown at her.

You still shouldn't have hit her. Hell, you could call child protective services since you informed her you could not watch the child, she acknowledged that and she left the baby there anyway and it has happened many times. She is abandoning her child to conditions that the child will not be taken care of, that deserves a CPS call. Physical violence really isn't the answer regardless.

[FlyingNakedMan]

Mameoyashi

You got into a fist fight? Unless you were using that force only to get away then yeah you were in the wrong there. Annoying or not, striking someone outside of self-defense is never appropriate. (That goes for her striking you as well, mind you, but that doesn't mean you were right for hitting or hitting back, whatever the case was).

The altercation between her and your father is between her and your father. Stay out of it. It's not wrong that you get frustrated, she does sound somewhat selfish. But honestly, that part is between your dad and her. You need to just stay out of that fight until it is over with.

Not having her father help out for free when she is trying to take college classes is another thing though. College and a baby is hard to manage and honestly she should be getting *some* support there from your dad. However the trade off would be helping rent (when she can) and paying for him (or someone else) to baby-sit when she's not taking courses (and to assure this he can help her with her schedule-making so he *knows* when he has courses).

If she wants people to help, she does need to start contributing.

However this is your father's battle. You can support him, but he's the head of the household, he's the parent, he's the one who has to make the final decision (which would be if she's really not contributing and if she's of age which she's going to college so she's... hat 17-18?] he can kick her out of the house).

I had a brother in a similar position. Not pregnant or with a child, but selfish and entitled as ******** and was always acting out against the family. Honestly, you just learn to let your parents deal with it. All you do if you step in the way will be cause things to escalate. It's tough, it's annoying. Just count the days until you can get out of there or until your father kicks her out. You need to support your father in his decisions as house-owner and authority figure, but that's all you can really do.

She's not going to college she wants too, but she says it's too much of a hassle, so she doesn't want to go.

Oh we had called the cops on her before, what did she do, SHE JUMPED OUT OF THE WINDOW TO AVOID THEM, that's why I was like, she'll just jump out of the window Again.

[FlyingNakedMan]

Second, my dad didn't want the cops involved, since my other sibling had called the cops on her when she used the baby as a weapon, and he said he didn't want my sister to lose custody of the baby, since HE wouldn't get to see the baby

[Mameoyashi]

Then you're stuck. Your dad doesn't want to get police or CPS (or equivalent) involved. He doesn't want to kick her out. He isn't making her face her responsibilities. He's enabling her to continue doing whatever the ******** she wants.

I suggest investing in some window locks and a lock on the door to your room so you can stop her from barging in. (Room locks can be as cheap as a couple of bucks, it could be a simple deadbolt you screw on even). And don't respond if she tries to come in or knock at the door. That way she can't dump the kid in your lap.

Otherwise, move out as soon as you can and leave the drama to your father. He's not going to help his own situation and he's the one in charge of the household. He's the parent, he's the one that has the power to do something about this. Again, talk to him, bring up your concerns, urge he do something about it and support him when he needs you to. Otherwise, keep to yourself, interact as little as you can with her and just bide your time until you can get away or until she ******** up majorly and gets herself out of the picture.