Absolutely Heart Broken

[Indigo_Stone]

I came here and posted this topic two weeks ago - http://www.gaiaonline.com/forum/life-issues/i-have-a-question-gaia-relationship-related/t.94415767_11

Needless to say my boyfriend in question broke up with me after a fight that just got way out of hand. He hadnt messaged me much today and when he did it was about having sex which naturally hurt me. I'm an insecure person. I brought this up and he was mad. We didnt talk I apologised, Didnt talk then he asked when I was coming over and I asked if he was still mad. It just escalated from there and he started saying things that made it seem it was over. I bit and kept calling when I should have left it alone but I couldn't...

He said it was over in the text and had his phone turned off. I went there so he could say it to my face and he did. he was out and his brother let me in and I saw in his emails he was already looking for a f*** buddy but I thought seeing me might change things. But he didnt he was insistant which I respect.

But regardless I'm so devestated that I cannot sleep. I feel like I'm going to throw up constantly and combined with my crying headache making me never want to cry again I'm just not coping. Every break up feels like the end of the world. I feel strange almost like I'm in denial trying to force myself out but I cant. I need help. I need someone to talk to. This feels like a terrible nightmare.

I know his mum got in his ear and made it so much worse than it had to be. But it doesn't matter. Its over and its killing me. I'm scared that I wont be able to pull myself out of my depression. Please... Some body PM me... I just cant cope. I tried so hard to make things work.

[StreetchIck123]

It's good that he did you a favor. Now once time flies bye you'll eventually realize you are happier without him.

It takes a little time for the storm to end. Take this time to hang out with friends, get hobbies, and build up your self esteem .

[vdszbz]

Wow, he sounds like a p***k to ask about sex then run right into looking for a FWB right after the breakup. Calm your d**k, man.

But yeah, it will hurt for now. Cry it out, write down how you feel (writing letters and not sending them helps), hang out with friends, and try to keep occupied right now.

[Misty_Mystix]

Half the amount of time you were with him is the amount of time you'll get over him. Think about how you were able to get over your other ex boyfriends every time. He's not going to be any different, you know you'll get over him.

Think about his faults, what you were wanting more of. This guy wants ******** partners, not a girlfriend. They won't bother showing you a good time except maybe in bed, but they usually turn out very selfish in it. These guys are douche bags you can't trust to be loyal to you. Think about how he disrespected you by him asking for sex of all things in that situation.

[Indigo_Stone]

StreetchIck123

It's good that he did you a favor. Now once time flies bye you'll eventually realize you are happier without him.

It takes a little time for the storm to end. Take this time to hang out with friends, get hobbies, and build up your self esteem .

I hope you are right. I actually dont think I wont be happier without him. Its that this just happened out of no where (kind of) and yet so fast. I didnt want it this way. But part of me knew that it wasnt going to last. I just wish that made it hurt less. That will be hard because most of my hobbies were with him but I'm sure I'll find a way.

br0wneyed-babe

Wow, he sounds like a p***k to ask about sex then run right into looking for a FWB right after the breakup. Calm your d**k, man.

But yeah, it will hurt for now. Cry it out, write down how you feel (writing letters and not sending them helps), hang out with friends, and try to keep occupied right now.

Thanks it actually makes me feel better knowing that what he did was wrong. I was manipulated in a way to believe that everything I did was wrong. Its still hard not to think that way.

I know I've been here before. I just hate that it hurts so bad for me and probably not so much for him after everything he said which makes me scared I'll never believe what any positive thing a guy says to me because of this. I think writting and not sending letters will probably help me get all this pain I didnt unleash on him in person out. I was too devestated at the time.

[vdszbz]

Yeah I feel you. I went through a pretty rough "break up" (I say that because I don't even consider it a relationship, how horrible it was) and I thought I was all wrong and I had so much anger and frustration that I wrote angry letters about it and in my diary and songs about it. I see now that HE was the evil one, and all the stuff I wrote down made me feel better, even if he never read it. That was months ago and just a few weeks ago he tried contacting me again... but all my anger/hatred/anything is gone and I couldn't care less about him, so I could ignore it smile

[Indigo_Stone]

Lilith_Lilium

Half the amount of time you were with him is the amount of time you'll get over him. Think about how you were able to get over your other ex boyfriends every time. He's not going to be any different, you know you'll get over him.

Think about his faults, what you were wanting more of. This guy wants ******** partners, not a girlfriend. They won't bother showing you a good time except maybe in bed, but they usually turn out very selfish in it. These guys are douche bags you can't trust to be loyal to you. Think about how he disrespected you by him asking for sex of all things in that situation.

I'm hoping I move on quicker than that. Like not with a new person but able to feel okay again. I always wander how I do. Things are always different and each break up I'm in a worse situation like less friends etc. Right now I barely work, all my hobbies were with mutual friends and I'm not studying. I know I will... Well I hope I do anyway. Its hard when it just happened.

Yeah I should think about them more. Mainly his mother, his inability to communicate with me during an argument, bringing up all the bad stuff I ever did... I still would have worked it out with him but I guess he just didnt want to put up with my faults anymore. It wasnt enough to outway my bad. Which hurts because of how I feel about it. But a relationship is a two way street...

we were together for nearly two years I knew I was more to him than that he just didnt want to cope with my insecurities anymore it wasnt worth it to him. But maybe your right. There were times he showed he was disloyal in that perspective. I know. And then doing this just cause I got so upset... I want to go back to that moment and change it but I know I cant...

[Indigo_Stone]

br0wneyed-babe

Yeah I feel you. I went through a pretty rough "break up" (I say that because I don't even consider it a relationship, how horrible it was) and I thought I was all wrong and I had so much anger and frustration that I wrote angry letters about it and in my diary and songs about it. I see now that HE was the evil one, and all the stuff I wrote down made me feel better, even if he never read it. That was months ago and just a few weeks ago he tried contacting me again... but all my anger/hatred/anything is gone and I couldn't care less about him, so I could ignore it smile

I guess everyone defines relationships in their own way. This one wasnt the best to be honest. But you cant just take those feelings away. Oh wow. I wish I had anger but all I have is sorrow at the moment. Its funny how they contact you when your over it.