That Damned Hippy
That Damned Hippy
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- Posted: Mon, 08 Oct 2012 18:19:00 +0000
Vampire Clan and other related NPCs
That Damned Hippy
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- Posted: Mon, 08 Oct 2012 18:34:23 +0000
Werewolf Pack and other related NPCs
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- Posted: Sat, 19 Jul 2014 04:28:07 +0000
- Drake, knew that what they were about to do was risky to say the least, but their whole relationship had been. He was just surprised that they had managed to keep it a secret for as long as they had. His Father was pretty good at sniffing it out - when someone was hiding something, he supposed that came with age. But Drake had learned from him - he knew how to hide things from his Father. But, hiding was hardly an option anymore. And he could feel the air of superiority, annoyance and disgust floating around the room. So many tricking their parents into a room together was a bad idea - but no matter how they went about it, it would be. Vampires and Werewolves had never really gotten along, an issue that extended far past his time of walking on the earth. But the sides were still bitter. And this would... In a way join the two sides and maybe force them to learn to live with each other.
"What are we doing here, Drake?" His father asked as he glanced over at the others with a clear look of disgust on his face.
"Well I, well we have something to tell you.." He started but trailed off when his Father opened his mouth to speak again.
"And what would that be? This better be good" he said. It was clear, through his voice that his annoyance with the situation was growing.
"If you let me finish speaking" he said as he gave his Father an annoyed look. Plenty of people were afraid of the mam - after all he was powerful, but to Drake he was just his Father and he had never been afraid of him. "Now as I was saying" he started but trailed off again on purpose. When his Father started to get annoyed, there was a vein that would pop out on his forehead - and the man was annoyed. "We thought that it was about time you meet your future family" he said.
A slightly confused look crossed over his fathers face. "And what do you mean by that?" He asked.
"I mean what it sounds like. I thought old age was supposed to make you wise. We've been together for a while... And plan to get married" he said as he glanced between his Mother who to the untrained eye always looked calm and his Father.
"Drake this is by far the least funny joke you have ever pulled. I would much rather you prance a pig into the house and tell me you plan to wed it" he said.
His parents had taken him being gay fairly well - it wasn't an uncommon thing. It was the fact that he was not only dating a werewolf but the leaders son that was angering the man. "I wouldn't joke about something like this. And I dunno Dad a pig would not look nearly as good naked as a werewolf" he said. He knew his Dad wouldn't appreciate the joke that much but all well. "We love each other and thats that" he said.
"I forbid it" he said firmly as he went to stand up, to stomp around or so Drake thought, but his Mother stopped the man from doing so. He could tell she wasn't calm but was acting like she was.
"You can't forbid me from doing it" he said. He knew his Father at the least wouldn't approve - but that changed nothing, it would happen, was going to happen and if Drake had his way it would happen soon. It wasn't like, he had anyone outside of his parents that he cared to have around. Worse come to worse, they could elope and just come home married - but Blake wanted to try and include them in it, if they would try.
"Now, now boys no need to pull out the fangs to see whose the big baddest scariest vampire in the room. Your Father and I will agree to try and he will try not to yell" she said.
Drake had always thought that his Mother was the scary one. She didn't show anger, she handled a situation with grace - and controlled his Father, which all together her made her a force to be reckoned with. "Good. Which us why we're at this house plenty of room for us all to get to know each other" he said with a smile. He could tell his Dad was about to question the sleeping arrangements but before he could Drake beat him too it. "And he and I will be sharing a room" he said. If they were going to be, getting married soon they would be spending every night together. His Father wanted to object but quickly put a stop too it.
"How long have the two of you been together?" She asked.
"A little over a year and a half" he said.
"So this isn't some random impulsive idea you have, that makes it slightly better" she said.
"No" he said simply, he couldn't argue because he was impulsive. His choice to get involved with him had been impulsive, but it had turned into something that he has never expected. He had easily, had a parade of men in his life. Never took a serious long term interest but enjoyed the benefits. But he was, for the first time, very serious about a relationship. Most of his previously had lasted a few months tops and usually they were only a few weeks. He had gotten around a lot, and that was sadly a well known fact about him. It was gossip and those he had slept with talking about it. But that was in the past.
"I think at this point we should simply be happy he has found someone he wishes to keep around. Even if his choice is questionable" she said.
"I'm pretty sure him being with me and trusting me with my track record is whats questionable here..." He said. He had gotten around a lot, yeah but he hadn't cheated on anyone. He had just moved from one person to the next extremely fast.
That Damned Hippy
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- Posted: Sun, 20 Jul 2014 00:03:37 +0000
This whole thing had started as an ill advised way to get under their parents skin - even though they had no intentions of telling their parents. It had been a matter of doing exactly what their parents would tell them not to do, and for Joel, this meant falling right into bed with the vampire leader’s famously promiscuous son. That had seemed all well and good at the time - sneaking to each other’s rooms, having a roll in the sheets right under the stuck up noses, but it hadn’t been meant to mean anything.
A year and a half later, here they were, introducing the families. Both families knew each other, even though it was pretty much a blood war between the vampires and the werewolves. Joel’s father always said that it was something in their blood, something ancient and dangerous, that made werewolves hate vampires, and vampires hate werewolves. Joel thought that it had more to do with the fact that they were both predatory species sharing the same hunting grounds.
Joel’s family had been there first, his parents sitting at a table with his two sisters. The Cohen pack was large, but Joel’s nuclear family was relatively small. Just his twin sister, Rachel, his older sister Kayla, and his parents. There were numerous other wolves in the pack - both related to Joel and non blood relations. When the vampires started into the room, Rachel was on her feet, before Kayla and Mrs. Cohen pulled her back into her seat - her canines were already extending from her gums, cutting into her lips. Joel tossed her a napkin, which she balled up and threw at his head. “What are they doing here?”
Again with all of the vampire and werewolf drama. They had expected that much. The vampire leader had appeared, and Joel’s father - the pack alpha, snapped a glass in his hand. Mrs Cohen didn’t even move to pick the glass out of her husband’s hand as she usually would, but fixed the vampire leader and his wife with the bright yellow eyes that flashed when a werewolf was closer to a transformation than they would have liked.
Drake’s brother looked unimpressed with the presence of the werewolves as well, and Joel rolled his eyes, moving from his chair to where Drake stood. Before he could say anything to his fiancé, Drake’s father had demanded an explanation. Joel’s family looked just as expectant, yellow eyes fixed on the vampires with a look of disgust. Joel knew what they were thinking - that vampires were dead things, monsters that had to feed on living humans to survive. Dead blood meant nothing to them.
While Drake’s father seemed to be driving the discussion, it was Joel’s older sister, Kayla, who started laughing. “No way, you’ve got to be kidding.” She shook her head - her hair was significantly darker than Joel’s, and caught the light in a way that was uniquely Kayla - “C’mon Joel, you can do better than… better than…”
“Better than dead,” Rachel said, her teeth had retracted, but she still looked ready to rip Drake's throat out. Joel’s parents were eerily silent. In the same way that they had been when he had come out to them when he was nineteen, nodding, like if they didn’t talk about it, it wouldn’t be an actual fact until it became obvious that there was no going back. They had been the same way when Rachel had brought her girlfriend home. The difference was, Rachel’s girlfriend was a werewolf, not a vampire.
Drake's father made it perfectly clear very quickly that he did not want Joel for a sun in law, going so far as to say that he would prefer a pig. Joel crossed his arms, and shook his head, “Well, you got me, not a pig.” He stepped on Drake’s foot at the comment about who looked better naked. Mrs Cohen started studiously picking the glass out of her husband’s hand at this point, apparently not even wanting to touch that comment with a ten foot pole.
Drake’s father was turning roughly the colour of a tomato, while his wife held his arm, trying to reason with him. Joel got the distinct feeling that it was Drake’s mother who ran the show, for all of the show that Drake’s father put on. Joel’s parents’ silence was not entirely unexpected. Werewolf packs usually didn’t work things out with words - it was largely about dominance and blood lines, who fell into line where. Joel, as the eldest son, was beta, and he would get to deal with his father, the alpha, soon enough. Werewolves just dealt with things more one on one, more secretively.
“It’s not for long,” Joel said, watching his family, whose eyes were fading. His oldest sister, Kayla, had her eyes almost back to their normal brown. “We’re not asking you to turn your backs on… god knows how many centuries of hate, we’re just asking you to tolerate each other for measured periods of time.” Like not killing each other during this vacation, and definitely not during the wedding.
Drake’s mother asked how long that they had been together, apparently assuming that Joel was just another in a long line. Joel knew about Drake’s history, but did his best not to hold it against him. After all, they had fallen into bed together the first night just to flout the tradition of hate. There had been nothing about love, or even affection, just a rebellious streak and sexual attraction. “We wouldn’t be getting married,” Joel said, shooting the woman an exasperated look, “if this was some impulse decision. That’s what Vegas is for.”
He had the feeling that Drake’s family were just going to look at Joel as another notch on the headboard. No matter how long they were together. It had something to do with being immortal, he knew, but he didn’t like it. He didn’t like being considered “questionable taste” either. “If you cheat on me, you’ll have a whole pack to deal with, so I’m not worried,” he shrugged. Drake seemed committed to their relationship, and he loved him, so that had to say something.
Mr Cohen, who had watched quietly up until now, opened his mouth to speak, just as the door swung open and a little old woman with a perm hobbled in with her walker. “What did I miss?” the old lady demanded, apparently thinking that no one had heard her, in spite of her bad hearing, she shouted, “WHAT DID I MISS?”
“You invited her?” Mrs Cohen asked, looking at her husband’s mother with thinly veiled dismay like she usually did.
Joel and his father both shook their heads, but Joel’s father cleared his throat, “Apparently we’re having a… wedding.”
Granny Cohen apparently missed the underlying tone of disapproval in her son’s voice - Joel certainly didn’t - and broke into a big grin, “Excellent, I love weddings! DRINKS ALL AROUND!”
Joel nudged Drake with his elbow and whispered, “I don’t know how she got invited.” He had “lost” her invitation, intending to tell her on his own, when she wouldn’t be causing a scene in front of the vampires.
As if on cue, the old lady caught sight of the vampires. “Well, I’m not offering that kind of drink, but I guess- who’s getting married?”
Mr Cohen made an ugly noise in the back of his throat, “Joel and Drake.”
Gran didn’t so much as skip a beat, “Well, I guess Joel’s the only one who’s getting bitten, y’know what I mean?” She waggled her thinning white eyebrows at Joel and Drake, before claiming the nearest seat, next to Drake’s brother, who scooted away from her. Joel hurried over to grab his grandmother by the arm and lead her over to the werewolf table where she wasn’t so likely to get murdered.
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- Posted: Sun, 20 Jul 2014 00:46:21 +0000
- Drake rolled his eyes at the woman's comments. He hadn't expected to be like, hell he had never expected Joel to actually like him. But he had, and he did - if he could win over one werewolf, he could win over a few more... Right? Probably not, but he could at least try to do so. Drake had to resist the natural instinct to pull his foot away, out of Joel's range when he stomped down on it. It hardly hurt, and didn't sting for more then a second - but he knew why the man had done it. "It's true though. All naked pigs do is make people want Bacon. And me personally I don't like Bacon..... Do like hot dogs though" he said.
A disgusted sound coming from his throat could be heard from his brother. The two had never gotten along, especially because he was gay and he just didn't approve of that. "No one, needs to hear about how much you like dicks. I think we have all heard enough of your night time escapades to know" he said. His tone was sour and disgusted - his usually tone of voice that he used when talking to him.
"I'm sorry your just jealous over the fact that you can't get laid at all" he said. The two had always went at it- it was life.
"I don't have to be here" his Brother said as he stood up and started walking towards the door to leave.
"Sit down" were the only words that left his Mothers mouth. The tone was different this time - it was harsh, and left zero room for argument. They both knew to listen to her, when she used that tone with them - it was one they were both probably, wisely afraid of. And his Brother turned around with an even more sour look on his face and planted his a** back down in the chair he had left a few seconds ago.
"Right. Now maybe we should take a lesson from the humans. Sunshine, rainbows and unicorns and lots of love. Or some stupid ******** s**t like that" he said as he waved his hand as if dismissing something. The two families really didn't have to spend any time together. "We aren't asking you to become best friends just not to oppose to this" he said. Honestly, he just wanted them to agree to try to like Joel and that was all.
Blake snorted at the comment "The only thing you've ever loved is your d**k" he said. "Well I oppose but them again I oppose to you being my brother" he said as he leaned back in the chair and crossed his arms over his chest like a child would.
"You seem to have under estimated the stupidity of my son. Him getting married impulsively to upset the family is something he would do" his Mother said.
"If that was the case I would have been married a copious amount of times already" he said. Drake had never been married, and his relationship with Joel was the longest one he had ever been in. "This is true..." He said. Already he really wasn't that afraid of a pack of wolves. The only thing he was ever afraid of sometimes was his Mother - and that was with good reason.
Drake quirked an eyebrow as the old woman burst into the room and quietly listened to the conversation at hand. A smirk spread across his face at the mention of someone getting bit - Drake made a point to make sure his fangs were in full view. "Only if he's lucky ya'know. Getting bit is a wonderful gift" he said.
He leaned over closer to Joel with an amused smile on his face. "I like her. Can I keep her? You can keep the puppies though" he said referring to his siblings. He didn't even like his own sibling, he didn't much expect to like Joel's. "Well I think your Grandma is game for coming to the wedding" he said as he grabbed Joels hand and brought it to his lips and kissed it.
"Oh god this is the most disgusting elaborate s**t you have ever pulled. Really Drake" his brother said.
"Sorry I don't take advice from snotty vampires that are younger then me with their heads up their a**" he said as he glanced over his his brother. "This isn't a joke Blake. Far from it" he said as he pulled Joel in closer to him and pressed his lips against his. To make a point, Drake made sure the kiss was a deeper one before pulling away. "Not a joke. Any questions?" He asked.
Drake turned around when he heard the door open. "Sorry I got lost.." She said as she glanced between Drake and Joel apparently not liking how close the two were too each other - or the fact that Drake was holding one of his hands, and had the other on his waist. "And who is this?" She asked giving Joel a 'How dare you steal my man look'
"My b.. I mean my fiancé" he said. That was a weird word to use, one he had never expected to use with a my in front of it. "This is my brothers wife" he said before leaning in closer to Joel "Just pretend she doesn't exist like we all try too" he said softly. He couldn't stand the woman, she was always trying to get him into bed and was clearly just after the families money... And everyone but Blake saw that. Drake couldn't remember mentioning that his Brother was married. He never mentioned the man much. "Don't use her as an accurate representation on vampires. Shes a money hungry ditz" he said.
"HEY. If I have to be respectful..." He started to say but Drake cut him off.
"If the shoe fits wear it. Like I admit to being a man whore...former man whore and her shoe definitely fits" he said.
Drake looked over at his Mother who was eyeing Blake and his ‘wife’, with a disgusted look on her face. The woman had taken a seat on, his lap and was leaning over - probably whispering less than suitable things in his ear, but Drake was not going to listen in on that conversation. “Considering the competition” She started as she turned her head back around to face them. “He’s easily the favorite” She said.
That Damned Hippy
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- Posted: Sun, 27 Jul 2014 00:32:21 +0000
Joel could have pointed out that pigs were rarely dressed up, except in children’s cartoons, but Drake was too old to remember children’s cartoons. Besides, he took the statement to a completely different place. Joel bit his lip, trying not to laugh. That was so typically Drake commentary - and it was a good thing that Joel wasn’t a prudish or particularly easy to fluster man, because he could tell from his twin sister’s face that she was imagining something that would make most people blush. It had the effect of making her look slightly cross eyed.
Blake, of course, had to make a scene. Drake had warned Joel to expect that, and Joel watched as Blake freaked out about how he did not need to hear about how his brother liked having sex with men. Drake had mentioned that his brother didn’t approve of being gay. He had also mentioned that the guy was bitter and just mean. Joel had to wonder if Blake meant “hearing about” Drake’s sexual antics in the literal form, as in, walking by the room, or if he meant Drake talking about his sexual escapades at the breakfast table, just to try to make his brother choke.
Neither option seemed at all unrealistic.
Drake’s brother got up to leave, but was ordered to sit down by their mother. Joel cut his gaze across the room to look at his family, who just looked stunned. Aside from his twin sister looking cross eyed, his older sister looked like she had heard more than she wanted to and looked a little wan. Joel’s father, of course, had his traditional poker face on, while Joel’s mother’s ears were notably redder where you could see them past her tied back hair.
It was fairly obvious that the werewolves didn’t want to make a scene in front of the vampires - Joel could practically see his father making a mental stockpile of comments to make when Drake’s family wasn’t hovering around, waiting to judge the werewolves. Werewolves were very aware of how they were seen by other species - though they were notably better respected than werepossums. There was just nothing good to say about werepossums.
By the looks of things, there was going to be some serious opposition to this marriage. Blake was obviously pissed off, and Drake’s parents both looked like they were taking the wedding as a joke. Joel’s family, on the other hand, seemed to have no idea what to make of the situation at all. At least it didn’t seem like Drake had gone and gotten married a million times. Joel hadn’t even been sure that Drake would say yes when he had asked - it had been one of those impulse things.
Drake didn’t seem particularly worried about the pack of wolves - if anything, he sounded slightly amused. Not that he would find it so amusing if a werewolf tried to bite his hand off, but, that was another story. Joel shot Drake a dirty look at the mention of being bitten being a gift - the first time that Drake had bitten him, he had wound up with a very angry werewolf pinning him down and snarling in his face.
The distraction of Joel’s grandmother showing up didn’t have a long lasting effect. Rachel was rubbing their grandmother’s blue veined arm, while the woman beamed happily at the couple. Gran may have been about fifty different kinds of loony toons, but she was an accepting and warm woman. She had been Joel’s favourite grandparent, and she was the only one left now. “If by the puppies you mean my sisters,” Joel said, leaving the statement hanging. There were worse things that his sisters had been called. There were a lot of really offensive names for werewolves, particularly of the female variety. “You’d better be willing to keep her, I’m pretty sure that she fell into a fountain of immortality or something. I swear, she’s as old as God.” He smiled as Drake kissed his hand - it was such an old fashioned (and Drake) thing to do.
But his smile faltered as Blake burst out about how disgusting this was. “And you’re a close minded bigot,” Joel said, with deceptive lightness. He definitely didn’t like Blake - vampires were old, and traditional. He had always known that. While his pack hadn’t been thrilled that Joel liked men, the important thing was that he took his role in his pack seriously. Beyond that, it didn’t have a hold within the pack. He was a man, he with the alphas oldest - and only - son, and he backed his dad up in territory confrontation. So long as he did all of that, no real questions were asked.
After all, it was the first son in a generation, not necessarily the alpha’s son, who became pack alpha. So it wasn’t like the possibility of having kids was particularly pressing for Joel.
Drake, unexpectedly, pulled Joel closer to him, and started kissing him. They had kept their relationship under wraps for so long that that was something of a surprise. Even so, Joel kissed him back, and could feel him smile against his mouth. At the any question’s mark, Granny Jo raised her hand, and Joel shook his head, mouthing no.
“Does this mean that I get to watch two guys make out?” she was rummaging through her purse and came out with a cell phone, that she had pointed at them, “Do it again, I’ll put it on the twitter.”
Joel rolled his eyes, and would have said something if a girl dressed like a very well paid hooker teetered in on her heels. He glanced over at his sisters, who looked suitably judgy at the moment - which was kind of funny, since Rachel was known for wearing really short skirts. Joel glanced over at Drake, who looked unamused by the woman’s presence, as she demanded to know who Joel was. At the same time that Drake said “my fiancé” Joel said “Joel.” But the vampires seemed to ignore him, and Drake introduced the woman as his brother’s wife.
Well, that just seemed sad. You could smell the gold digger on this one. “I can… kind of tell,” he said quietly, in Drake’s ear. The woman looked unimpressed, as did Blake. Drake, for his part, candidly admitted to being a man whore. At least they weren’t bringing Joel’s sexual history into the debate. Rachel would certainly drill Joel about what kind of manwhore he was marrying. He just had to hope that she would come to terms with it.
“Good to know,” Joel said, looking at Drake, like, couldn’t he have mentioned that he had a sister in law who clearly wanted to rip his clothes off with her teeth.
“Of course it’s no competition,” Granny said, with a huff, “It’s Joel.” She cocked her head to the side, “Which I guess makes you the better trophy wife.”
“Gran, I’m not a trophy wife,” Joel said, trying not the smile. His grandmother was fiddling with her phone again, Rachel looked like she was close to taking the phone away from her.
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- Posted: Sun, 27 Jul 2014 03:26:19 +0000
- Drake knew that his family, was just viewing this whole thing as another one of his whims. Usually, his whims lasted days, or at most a few weeks. He would hardly call this a whim at all. It wasn't a whim, it was something he had never expected. He had honestly, never really believed in love, it had always been just a thing he thought people made up - he was wrong. But, it had happened and here they were. Drake had never thought he would agree to marry someone - and yet he had. Without thinking twice about his answer, a yes had just come out almost instantly.
"By puppies I sort of mean all of them..." He said. They were all a lot younger then himself, even though Drake wasn't someone who ever really talked about his age. He had just told Joel that he had been around a long time - which with vampires, was pretty much expected. Drake rolled his eyes at the mention of the fountain of youth. "The fountain of immortaility is probably mixed with vampire blood" he said. They lived the longest - most other supernatural creatures aged and died normally. Witches, however seemed to be able to find ways around aging and dying if you could afford the high cost that was.
Drake rolled his eyes at his Brother. The man really had no room to talk about anything - considering the thing he had married. "He just has a huge stick up his a**, the unpleasant kind" he said. Drake had tried at first to form some sort of bond with Blake - but the man had put up walls to prevent it at every turn.
"A close minded bigot sure. Or just his Brother who had to listen to all his fun activities" he said.
"No one asked you to focus on my bedroom that by the way is ON THE opposite side of the house from his" he said. Had his Brother actually heard him having sex that was his own fault for listening in on him, on purpose.
Drake turned and stared at the women when she pulled out her phone. A confused expression crossed over his face at the mention of Twitter. "Joel... Whats twitter and why am I slightly afraid?" He asked. He had never gotten involved with a lot of the hype or technology of the age. He knew how to use a computer, and had a cell phone for texting and calling (that had mostly been used to keep in touch with Joel) but that was about it. His knowledge of the new 'cool things' was very slim.
Drake watched as his Mother turned and looked at his sister in law. "There are other people in the room, control yourself" she said coldly. The woman sort of flirted with everyone, and Blake was convinced that it was Drake who wanted into her pants. God, he so did not want into her pants - he would probably catch something and die.
"It appears we may have given our children too much freedom in the relationship department. A former stripper, con artist and a werewolf" she said.
"And I'm sure you noticed her... Interest in me. She hardly hides it" he said as he leaned in closer to Blake. His Mother was eyeing the couple - giving them the evil eye, so clothes didn't start getting thrown off. "Everyone but Blake sees it" he said with a shrug. The woman had gone so far as to barge into his room while he was out and wait for him in a sexy manner.
Drake smiled at the woman "Yes obviously no competition. Joel is amazing, I mean after all he got me to... Settle down as you call it" he said. The way Drake saw it, he was old - he had lived a long time, he needed some excitement in his life and getting around had kept things interesting. "He's just so cute" he said. He really was very much into Joel and hopefully his parents would notice this.
"The only down fall being the fleas they carry around with them" Blake said as he castes a dirty glare in Joel's direction.
"And you carry around a parasite" he said as he motioned towards his wife - who stormed out of the room with a huff, apparently offended - and was quickly followed by Blake. "As you can see a vampire family is not that different then a normal family. We just tend to try to tare each others throats out when we get into it" he said with a shrug. Vampires bit sometimes on instinct - like he had bit Joel during sex early on. It was an instinct and a neck to a vampire could be extremely sensual... And Joel had a nice neck attached to a nice everything.
Somethings were better left unspoken, they had all seen the marks on Blake's wife when she was human - he had feed on her. Whatever the two of them did or didn't do, or whatever Joel was or wasn't okay with Drake doing was between them. "But the point is, this will happen with or without your approval we are simply passing on the news" he said. They could just go to the courts and get married - he doubted Joel would be okay with a random elopement, however Drake would be okay with that.
Drake thought he saw his Father gritting his teeth before he opened his mouth to speak. "I don't approve of this but we let Blake marry that woman... We have no legitimate reason to object to this" he said. He wad right, they had stepped away and let Blake marry and turn the wretched woman. "We always said you could marry who you pleased" he said. He had married who he had pleased - even though it wasn't the woman he had been supposed to marry.
"I would say not to get your hopes up on my son actually making it to the wedding" he said. Drake could hardly blame his father for the lack of faith in him, but he was going to prove every last one of them wrong.
That Damned Hippy
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- Posted: Sat, 09 Aug 2014 03:15:22 +0000
- Joel raised an eyebrow, “Don’t call my parents puppies. And definitely don’t call my grandma a puppy.” He didn’t push Drake about his age - vampires lived for a ridiculously long time, and Joel knew that there would be an insane age difference between the two of them. It hadn’t occurred to him when he had fallen into bed with Drake the first time - but not a lot had occurred to him that night, just a lot of not wanting to live by the stupid rules of vampires hating werewolves, and werewolves hating witches, and all of that crap.
Mr Cohen had tented his fingers, and was watching the exchange between the vampire family with a shadowed expression that Joel knew would mean trouble later. His father was probably filing things away to use against the vampires at a later date. Wolves were not as long term thinkers as vampires, due to the brevity of their existence, but that didn’t mean that some of them weren’t scheming bastards. Joel’s father was one of that category.
“I have no idea, but she found it, probably fell in it,” Joel said lightly. His grandmother was very long lived - werewolves didn’t have as long of a life span as humans a lot of the time, due to territory battles with other packs, and the fact that they dealt with so many different breeds of rival supernatural species. And the occasional human who figured out that silver bullets could do some serious damage.
Blake, of course, couldn’t stay out of the conversation for long. Joel rolled his eyes, “Blake, meet Rachel. Her and her girlfriend broke my bed last week.” Rachel, at that, let out a snort of laughter, and tossed her blonde hair, looking challengingly at the young vampire. As much as Rachel was sure to not approve of her twin brother’s relationship with a vampire, she would always side with him against vampires.
“I did replace it,” Rachel said delicately, “and if you’ve been sexing it up with a vampire, I imagine that it was partly your fault that it broke in the first place.”
Joel chose to ignore that statement, though he could tell that Rachel was totally holding out for a response. He was spared having to respond by Drake’s question about Twitter, “Umm, it’s this thing that people use to tell people what they’re doing… and to stalk people.” He couldn’t think of a better definition than that. “And you’re probably afraid because my grandmother does have that effect on people,” he shot the woman a fond but exasperated look. She was sitting in her spot, humming happily to herself as if she wasn’t the topic of conversation.
Drake’s mother told Brittany, the sister in law, to contain herself. Joel raised his eyebrows at the woman, but kept his expression even - if Brittany wanted in his fiance’s pants, the girl was going to have a hard time. Aside from being an older vampire, and, therefore stronger, Drake also happened to be very, very gay. Not that Joel knew what very gay even meant, but he didn’t seem to have a smidge of straight in him. Mrs Asmodei then sighed, and pointed out that Joel was just another in a long line of undesirable partners for her children. Joel shrugged - he didn’t care what a bunch of stuck up vampires thought of him.
“I think I’ve noticed,” Joel said, “She gave me a very classic ‘what do you think you’re doing with my man’ look.” He was familiar with the look. One of the downfalls of being an out teenager had been the not out guys taking an interest, and not informing him that they had girlfriends. It was nice to not have to worry overmuch about that - though judging from the look on Brittany’s face, he would have to watch his back, or she would try to stab him or something.
Joel smiled at Blake - though his expression caught when Blake mentioned fleas. “We do not have fleas,” Joel said firmly, “We’re werewolves, not stray dogs.” He had never had a flea problem - he had gone through this with Drake - and neither had any of his relatives. They didn’t spend enough time as wolves to develop the problem.
Drake deftly turned the conversation back on Blake - who looked like he would have been turning purple if he had had human blood flow - his wife looked equally angry. Parasite was not a compliment.
Mrs Cohen cleared her throat quietly, “We’ll have to talk to you about this later, Joel.” They wouldn’t object entirely - but they would certainly try to put ideas in his head to change his mind. Joel could imagine the arguments - that Drake only wanted a long term partner for the sake of having a regular blood supply. He had heard that kind of argument made about pretty much any kind of partner a vampire took on. “I’m sure that we’ll be just fine,” Joel said - if Drake decided that he was going to move on and find someone else, that was how life went, but he doubted that it would happen.
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- Posted: Sat, 09 Aug 2014 13:46:44 +0000
- “I totally wasn’t including your Grandma in that statement because she actually looks older then me…” He said. Drake was not one to talk about his age - outside of his family, no one really knew. Vampires tended to live a long time, everyone knew that. Joel knew he was born a vampire, and had been around a while - how long, well Drake didn’t like being specific about such things. He was old, he had been around for a while as far as he was concerned that was all anyone needed to know.
“Would have been nicer if it was the fountain of immortality and youth, but beggers can’t be choosers right?” He asked. He was sure, when they were alone the issue of Joel, unlike himself, actually aging was going to come up. And that was a bridge the two of them would cross at a later date… right now they had plenty of other bridges to cross and hopefully not watch burn to the ground.
An amused look spread across his face at the mention of Rachel having broken Joel’s bed - why the two were in Joel’s bed, was quite frankly beyond him, because he would never ever invite anyone into Blake’s bed with him. But, that didn’t mean he hadn’t lied to Blake a few times to scare him out of his bed about having BEEN in it with someone. “Hey now, considering the frequency and length of time of which… I have been active I know how to not break a bed” He said.
He wasn’t a freshly turned vampire with no idea of his strength, or now to control it - he knew perfectly well. He was perfectly capable of not breaking a bed, but sometimes when you got caught up in things, control flew out the window. Although, Drake was more likely to try to bite you during sex because of control flying away over actually breaking the bed.
“However, I do like this one” He said. Drake’s standards on people were pretty low really, he wasn’t overly picky and was someone who generally liked almost everyone - usually. He was, funny enough usually an easy person to please and get along with.
Drake couldn’t help but cast Joel a confused look when he mentioned what twitter was. “Why would a vampire need access to a social media thing to stalk someone?” He asked with a quirked eyebrow. Vampires, was notoriously good hunters who generally liked to stalk and scare the crap out of their prey. “Also, that sounds like all sorts of horrible my picture being online. Someone would probably find some old a** painting of me that’s floating around somewhere and be like ‘oh my god they look alike’ and be dead a** on about us being the same person” He said.
Drake was sure there were paintings of him from back when floating around - never been famous, but if the art work was old enough people didn’t seem to care who was in it sometimes. Drake couldn’t help but roll his eyes as he leaned in closer to Joel “For the record I have never once been in bed with a woman… Okay well technically that statement isn’t true because I have been IN a bed with my best friend but we we’re fully clothed. I have never actually had sex with a woman. That sounds more accurate” He said.
Drake was sure, his friend had come up a few times - although how much Joel knew, probably wasn’t much, and he had decided it was best to have them meet when his parents weren’t around. “By the way when my Mom called her an ex stripper she was being serious…. which has lead to a lot of very disturbing things happening when I walk into my room sometimes” He said. Drake still couldn’t figure out, how his Brother had ended up with a very human stripper - but he had and now they were all stuck with her.
Drake, sadly enough had wondered about the fleas as well. Although he had asked in a fairly nice ‘Do werewolves ever get fleas?’ sort of way. He, was pretty sure it was just a vampire hating werewolf issue to think they had fleas. Drake’s eyes wondered over to Joel’s father when he mentioned them having to talk later. “I’m not as bad as I seem on paper or sound. In my defense life gets really friken boring when you live… for an undisclosed but long number of years. I mean one has to find ways to keep themselves busy and I supposed I could have become a legendary serial killer but then that totally would make me look bad” He said.
The list of people Drake had killed in his life was actually really short, and those he had killed - well in his eyes they had deserved it. Sometimes, bad people just didn’t deserve to live - but he didn’t make a habit of killing humans, not often at least - especially not innocent ones, if any human was really innocent these days. Vampires, were a different story, and he couldn’t say he had really gone at it with many werewolves - even though he wasn’t really afraid, and liked to poke the bear so to speak.
“In all honesty I could be a lot worse” He said. So he was slightly or rather very vulgar and spoke his mind - but it could have been a lot worse then that. “I mean as far as vampires go I’m a fairly happy well adjusted one” He said. It really did seem like most vampires these days were just constantly angry and walking around witha frown on their face.
Drake looked over at his Mother when she started speaking again. “So not only do we have a birthday party to plan, we now have an engagement party to plan” She said.
Drake was sure that for once in his life - he looked like the tv or movie version of a vampire, and had gone fairly white in the face. “What Birthday. No birthday” He said. Vampires, weren’t really ones to celebrate birthdays. Usually only every hundred years - one hundred being the first big one, followed by five and then… the one he was coming up on.
Drakes eyes shot over to Blake who had a smirk on his face - before he could say anything the man started speaking. “What do you mean no birthday? It’s an important one to” He said as he looked between Drake and Joel. “What don’t want him to know how old you’ll be?” He asked. “Vampires have very few important birthdays, the first hundred with Drake is well past. Then five hundred with Drake is always past, and then six hundred and sixty six which is what he’s coming up on. Big event for us honestly” He said.
Drake couldn’t help but twitch, as he grabbed the closest thing to him and ended up tossing a very large vase directly at his brothers head - thankfully his Brother had never been too swift, and Drake hit him dead on in the face with it.
“Oh dear. We might want to evacuate the house, these two have knocked over plenty of houses when they get going” She said as she glanced over at Blake - who was picking glass out of his face, funny enough his wife had managed to move quickly enough to avoid getting hit.
Drake was angry, as he was sure Blake was - but he was doing his best to control himself. “Well thankfully enough I won’t have to see him much anymore as I’ll be moving out” He said as he gave his brother a nasty look - one that would kill, if looks could kill.
The look on his Mothers face quickly changed “What do you mean you’ll be moving out?” She asked.
“… Isn’t that fairly obvious? I mean I highly doubt Joel wants to live in a house with a bunch of a vampires and a sister in law who wants to rip my clothes off with her teeth” he said. Drake sighed some as he rubbed his head [********, all this stress is making my head hurt... and now I'm hungry" He said, which he totally hadn't been before but now he really was.
That Damned Hippy
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- Posted: Fri, 15 Aug 2014 02:16:10 +0000
- Mr Cohen snorted ungraciously. “I think my parents also look older than you,” Joel pointed out. His parents were, after all, in their late forties by now. They both had graying hair, though, thank god, neither of them seemed to be experiencing problems with hair loss. “You know, there are actually stories about that,” he said. In Greek Mythology, there were a variety of stories about what happened when a person was granted immortality but not eternal youth - both out of spite and out of forgetfulness.
While it was true that they had never broken a bed, Joel could hardly say that they were above his sister and her girlfriend in some regards. Both his sister and her girlfriend were werewolves - the pack just didn’t give a damn about sexual orientation. But Joel doubted that there was nearly so much biting going on with them. Though, with Joel and Drake, it was entirely one sided, since a werewolf bite could prove fatal for a vampire. Joel had a lot better self control when it came to biting that Drake did - something that Drake had to be grateful for.
“So, you’re saying that you broke beds before you got enough experience?” Granny called out, looking earnestly interested. It made Joel want to crawl into a hole and die, since there was no deterring the woman. She sat, now knitting something that looked like a neon green circus tent with canary yellow trim, “I mean, what is vampire-werewolf sex like? Louder? Longer? Rougher?”
Rachel had the courtesy to remove Granny’s knitting from her to distract her. “Gran, enough,” Rachel said, looking a little red around the ears.
“But he didn’t answer my question. I mean, do you do it doggie-”
Rachel clamped a hand over Granny Cohen’s mouth. “Swallow it,” Rachel said, releasing her grandmother.
“-that’s something that I never understood about oral, do you-”
“GRAN!” Joel shouted, “Enough, seriously.”
Granny blinked twice, seized her knitting from Rachel, and began ticking away at the pattern, the only sound from her being the clacking of her knitting needles together. Though, knowing her, she would be compiling a list of things to ask people when their mouths were full and were likely to choke on something.
Drake seemed to be handling the Cohen craziness well enough, and merely announced that he liked Joel, before asking what a vampire would need social media for. Joel shrugged. Vampires were ideal hunters. Their prey were humans, so they were attractive, to draw their prey in. Stronger, faster, and smarter than regular humans. They also healed faster and were impervious to certain kinds of wounds that would leave a regular human writhing in pain to their death. “People come up with weird conspiracy theories online all the time, no one would really care if you looked like an old picture.”
As Drake leaned closer to explain that he had never actually had sex with a woman, Joel shrugged, “I kind of figured. You’re kind of really gay.” As a teenager, Joel had experimented a bit, but at the end of the day, he was gay. And he’d never had sex with a woman either - made out with, cupped a feel, but nothing really intense or meaningful. Just going through the motions with someone didn’t mean anything.
Somehow, it did not surprise him that that woman had been a stripper at one point in her life. Joel shot the woman a not impressed look, “So long as she stops.” As long as Drake wasn’t soliciting the attention, he would have to deal with it.
“Instead of becoming a legendary serial killer, you decided that you’d have sex with as many men as possible?” Joel clarified, keeping the judgement out of his tone. It wasn’t his place to judge what Drake had done before they had started falling into bed together. It certainly wasn’t his place to say anything about things that had happened before he was born.
Then the conversation turned to Drake’s birthday - because there were multiple parties to plan, apparently. Joel hadn’t thought about an engagement party. He had human friends, that he wouldn’t want the vampires to be around them if they were hungry. He wasn’t going to say anything, until Blake mentioned that Drake was turning six hundred and sixty-six.
Drake had whirled on Blake, and Joel just stood there, looking stunned. Six hundred and sixty-six? That was older than he had guessed. Definitely older than he had expected. He wasn’t sure what to say to that.
He rubbed his temples, deciding to have this discussion with Drake when no one was around to mock him for it. Early twenties versus closing in on seven hundred year old vampire. Jesus.
Luckily, the discussion moved from age, to Drake’s plan to move out. Joel just nodded, “Yeah, he was going to move in with me.” He didn’t live with his parents anymore - the bed that Rachel had broken had been in his old room, back when he’d still lived with his parents. Drake and Joel wouldn’t have been able to sneak around so well if they hadn’t at least had a place to mess around without people knowing. Joel resisted the urge to step away when Drake mentioned that he was hungry, and just said “Later.”
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- Posted: Fri, 15 Aug 2014 03:07:21 +0000
- “Well yes, but not THAT much older than me” He said with a shrug. Drake hadn’t aged a day in such a long time - not that he was complaining, he was gorgeous young looking man. “There are a lot of stories about everything, I tend not to put much store in them” he said with a shrug. The good stories about vampires, were the old ones - the knew ones sucked. They were crappy, horribly written and people took way to much creative freedom with vampires.
Man, he had never been more tempted to kill an ‘innocent’ human being in his life, then he had after being forced into reading Twilight. Glittering vampires, ha - if anyone deserved to burn in the sun it was that woman. He wasn’t sure what bothered him most, the vampire or the way the main female was portrayed. But Drake was used to females who would kick your a** - his Mother for example, was a serious force to be reckoned with and was scary as all hell.
“I’ve broken a lot of things…” he said. Lamps, holes in weak walls, beds - he could pretty much make a long list of things he had broken in the heat of the moment - if the sex, had been with a fellow vampire at least. Tables, chairs, now that he thought about it he had broken a lot of things. “Not much different then sex with a vampire…” He said honestly. Vampires and Werewolves generally had the same stamina level - vampires just generally weren’t tempted to take a bite out of other vampires.
Drake couldn’t help but stare at the woman, and feel slightly annoyed that the woman were stopping her questions - because questions like that we’re totally up his alley. “I’ll try anything once” He said as he sent a wink in her directly. “Anything once, with a man at least” He said, clarifying he was NOT up for trying anything with a female.
“But Joel… her questions amuse me” He said. He liked this woman, he was totally game for her becoming part of his extended family. “Hey Grandma can you knit d**k socks?” He asked, his face completely serious and not a hint of joking in his voice. Drake, had never actually called anyone Grandma before - he wasn’t sure of his Parents, Parent’s were even alive or if they were just not in contact and didn’t really care much either.
“But still I’ll stick to not being online” he said. Drake was content with not having his face all over the internet, as it was he wasn’t sure it wasn’t somehow on the internet through some old painting or something.
“I am really really gay and always have been” He said, completely unashamed by it. Drake had always been pretty gay, always been attractive to men - and had never once thought about sleeping with a woman.
“I don’t think she will stop. I have gotten pretty nasty regarding her attempts” He said. He had tried to put her down nicely at first, and after the first ten or fifteen times she had worn his patience down to nothing - and now he was, just nasty towards her in general, especially when she showed up half naked, or naked in his bedroom.
Drake paused for a minute thinking about what had Joel has said. “I should have kept count, if the world knew about vampires I could have landed myself in the Guinness book of world records. I’m actually slightly disappointed now, because I probably would have ruled that category…” He said, and trailed off after realizing he might have dug himself into a bit of a hole with those comments.
“But I’ve never slept with the same person as many times as I’ve slept with you” He said, in a quiet voice so only Joel would hear him - unless the others were listening in closely to the conversation. But, with the fuming anger and annoyance between all of them and the tension he doubted it.
Drake was less then pleased with the mention of his age and his birthday coming up - he didn’t want a birthday party, but it was tradition, and tell a vampire that was like a thousand years old to break tradition never went well. And he knew, because he had tried it before.
He was distracted however by the look on his Mothers face, who looked like she was extremely upset by the prospect of him moving out. “It’s for the best” He said simply. He didn’t have to be around his sister in law then, he got to be with Joel - and he was more then old enough to be out on his own.
Drake glanced over at Joel when he said later, he hadn’t been thinking about biting Joel - his parents were around, his siblings were around - he had been thinking about going out and finding someone to eat. “I’m just going to go out and find food… can you guys TRY not to kill each other?” he questioned as he looked over at Blake who was still picking pieces out of his bloody face with an extremely angry look on his face.
Before he left he glanced at Joel and dragged the man with him towards the door, shutting it after them once they were outside. “Make sure none of them kill each other” He said. He couldn’t help but rub his temples again with his fingers. “Good god I’m too old for some of this s**t” He said, mostly the immaturity his brother and his wife brought to the table.
“Which is a different issue, because you know as far as vampires go I’m fairly young” He said. It wasn’t as if he wanted to hide it from Joel - it just wasn’t something he talked about, even with other vampires.
“But I really am going to go find something to eat, before I try to rip Blake’s heart out” He said, because he got pissy when he got overly hungry and his patience level with his brother dropped to below zero, and he had been known to lunge at him a few times. “I’ll try not to be long…. but I will admit to being quite picky” He said, as far as it came to humans - he was really picky with who he decided to take a bite out of.
That Damned Hippy
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- Posted: Tue, 26 Aug 2014 03:28:58 +0000
Joel shrugged - whatever. His boyfriend was older than his grandparents, even if he looked younger than his parents. That was just some screwed up math that he was going to have to deal with at some point. “I said that there were stories, not that they were credible,” Joel said, not at all bothered by this. Most of the original vampire stories had wound up so tied up with anti-Semitic sentiments that it was hard to look at any of them without thinking Hitler.
“I’d like to point out that he has broken none of those things with me,” Joel said quickly, seeing his father go a little cross eyed. He and his dad never talked about his “choice” in partners. It was just something that Mr Cohen silently dealt with. They weren’t exactly chatting about it on a regular basis, and Joel had no wish to start. He was a pretty personal person about that kind of thing.
Drake, of course, was not so much, and started on about how sex with a werewolf wasn’t so different from sex with a vampire. Joel raised his eyebrows, “I wouldn’t know.” Being a lot younger than his boyfriend, he had significantly less of a line up of ex romantic partners. That was something that did not bother Joel - he had never liked sleeping around. The falling into bed with Drake to piss his family off had been out of character, but they had both been angry with their family, and angry sex was rarely in character for people.
Granny seemed thrilled that Drake was willing to converse with her about this, “Oh, do I have ideas for you.” She beamed at Joel, who felt his face going red. He had no doubt that she did. He also had no doubt that he did not want his fiance talking about their sex life with his grandmother.
“You’ll regret encouraging her, trust me,” Joel said, rubbing his temples, as Drake had to go and request a very unusual knitting pattern.
Granny, for her part, seemed unperturbed, “Well, I’d need some measurements. Don’t want it too tight, or you’ll regret it,” she grinned mischievously, “and if it’s too big… well, we wouldn’t want that either.” Joel’s sisters apparently gave up on her by this point, and just rolled their eyes, almost in unison.
Drake, thankfully, didn’t seem completely set on staying on that topic, so Joel just agreed when Drake said that he would stick to staying offline. A part of Joel’s mind said that that was probably the safest way to go. Who knew what Drake would be able to dig up on youtube or google. He would probably find all sorts of weird things that he would think would be a good idea. “As opposed to a little gay?” Joel teased.
Joel shrugged. He wasn’t sure what Drake wanted to be about the woman’s unwanted attentions, but Joel was hoping that the woman would just ignore him. He had no interest in getting involved in a bunch of vampire family drama and politics. Werewolves didn’t live long enough to get into family disputes of the magnitude of vampire disputes.
He narrowed his eyes at Drake, “There’s such a thing as too much information.” The rest of the Cohen pack were probably silently agreeing with Joel right now. Joel, who was actually marrying the guy, didn’t need to know that much about Drake’s previous partners. He knew that they had been numerous. He knew that he hadn’t taken them seriously. He knew that a lot of people would assume that he wasn’t taking Joel seriously. He was just going to have to hope that they were going to prove them wrong, and that he wasn’t just getting played like a naive little mortal.
“That’s comforting,” Joel said, voice even. Though, again, this was probably too much information for everyone else involved, at least this time Drake kept his voice down. “I’m not concerned.” Past partners aside, Joel could hardly talk, since he had fallen into bed with a guy that he had just met, even if that was not the kind of thing that he usually did.
There was a definite increase in the hostile feeling in the room now that Drake had made it known that he wanted to move out. Joel had to marvel at the fact that a vampire mother, who had had her son for so long, could be opposed to him moving out after nearly seven hundred years. When Joel had moved out the first time, he’d been seventeen. It hadn’t been full time, and even then, it hadn’t been far away, but it was a far cry from how old Drake was.
Joel could see the look on his mother’s face that said pretty much the same thing. The older werewolf woman had occupied her attention by trying to brush her thick blonde hair behind her ears, which only served to emphasize the streaks of gray that winged out from her temples. His parents looked so different from Drake’s parents.
Drake requested that the families not try to kill each other, and then pulled Joel out of the room. “If your family decides to rip each other to bits, don’t expect the pack to intervene, we don’t really involve ourselves in… things that don’t directly involve werewolves.” The underlying truth was that there were four vampires, and six werewolves. One of the werewolves was into her eighties, and vampires were just naturally stronger and faster. The pack couldn’t really stop them from killing each other without incurring some serious damage to the pack. It would be pointless. Joel figured that Drake knew that. “But I’ll try. I think they’ll just… glare at each other.”
He shrugged, “Don’t be too fussy, if your brother takes a swipe at my Gran or my sisters, he’s going to start something that the pack will finish. And we both know that.” Wolves were pack animals. They had no qualms about ganging up on foolish vampires who wandered off by themselves. “I’ll see you then,” he said, brushing his fingers across Drake’s cheek, before heading back into the room to deal with the family feud waiting to happen.
Granny was still knitting away happily, Joel’s sisters both had their phones and were ignoring the world, while Mr and Mrs Cohen watched the vampires warily. There was a certain tenseness in the whole family that didn’t look good, except for Granny, who was humming a song that sounded like it was supposed to be the national anthem, but sounded more like something by Ke$ha.