And now, on to the contents of this package: Timmy, my annual turkey feast just wasn't the same without you here! I always get so drowsy from gorging myself on birdmeat, and I guess I took for granted what a little trooper you are about doing the dishes.
So, to give you a little taste of home during your arduous journey, I've included all the dirty dishes from my Thanksgiving feast. I hope you'll be a little darling and wash them all and send them back in a timely manner-- I need them before Xmas Eve so I can use them for my holiday feast!
I know I haven't been paying you your normal salary during your little vacation, but I trust you'll still be able to pay the postage.
*Breaks into the studio*