"I don't add people unless..."

[Threinegha]

I'm a regular towns user. If you are as well, you know what it's like on an average basis and if you aren't, well you get a lot of random adds from people whenever you're around. Some people like this, but I'm one of those people who doesn't like adding people that I haven't talked to and probably won't talk to. My friends list isn't a place to see how full I can get it, it's a place for me to keep track of my buddies.

So whenever I get a random add, I often PM the person asking why they added me, and respond with "I don't add people unless I've had a conversation with them first." I get some pretty interesting reactions from this. The most common ones are people seem to be immediately shut down by it, or they get offended and respond with things such as "well how can you get to know someone if you don't add them?" or "add me and then we can talk lol" or "there's no need to be rude, it's just a random add." I'm not sure when having a conversation with someone became such a task.

So what about you GCD? How do you feel about random adds?

Spoons n s**t:
gaia_spoons Do you like random adds? If so, why? If not, what are your reasons?
gaia_spoons Do you prefer to talk to people before you add them? If not, why not?
gaia_spoons How full is your friends list? Do you know all of them? Do you ever clean it out?
gaia_spoons Do you ever meet people who get uppity because you won't add them randomly?
gaia_spoons Any horror funny stories about random adds?

[hornworts]

I only add people if a) I recognize them and b) I like them.

However I don't see much point to the friend system either or.

[Vampurrrrr]

Do you like random adds? If so, why? If not, what are your reasons?
Not really.
I only add people I have spoke to a few times, or am good friends with.
I personally just don't see the point in adding people if you're not
going to talk to them/get to know them.

Do you prefer to talk to people before you add them? If not, why not?
Yes, basically all the time

How full is your friends list? Do you know all of them? Do you ever clean it out?
Frequently.
Lots of people on my friends list have left/quit, so I always go through it.

Do you ever meet people who get uppity because you won't add them randomly?
Not yet, no.

[Kain-Senpai]

I get at least one random add a week. I just decline their offer. No one has PM'd me yet about it.

[.~[Misty.Muffin]~.]

❤

I never add people i dont know and quite frequently delete people i dont talk to.. <w<

[Purinii]

I only add those who I've spoken to also. It must be an actual conversation too, not just hellos and hi every time we meet and they go off town hopping.
Random adds usually end there, there's no further conversation, nor any interaction.
And it'd help if we have similar interests and they aren't two-faced or rude.
When I get random adds, I just decline them without a word, if they wish to ask why through a PM, I am not opposed to answering them.

I keep my friendlist small, and regularly check up on it.

[Jayce Reinhardt]

I don't like Random adds, especially if they say absolutely nothing to me.
Like they just add me and expect me to know why. This isn't facebook, You don't need random adds to pad your friendslist for popularity or because you need
players for a game.

If I haven't know someone for a few months, I am sorry but just don't add me. I base my friendships on actually knowing who the hell the person is and since this is the internet you don't know if someone is crazy or some weirdo lying about their age.

My friends list isn't that full, Everyone who is on it however I have known for literally years.

I did have this one person who called me an elitist b***h who thought I was too good for anyone but in my head I was thinking "No, it's because I have no idea who the hell you are and being cautious online is a GOOD thing"

[Dancing In Lunar Rays]

I haven't lurked in towns for a while so this is throwing me back a bit. But I still get random friends requests a few times a month.

Do you like random adds? If so, why? If not, what are your reasons?

- Not really. I don't understand the whole random add thing. It's really not hard to private message a person off your friends list to get to know them. I'd rather converse before putting them on my friends list.

Do you prefer to talk to people before you add them? If not, why not?

- Yes. I look at it the same way things work outside the internet. Are you automatically friends with a person when they just glance at you? No. At least not for me. If you want to be friends with that person then just start a conversation, find common interests and just roll with it. Most of the time the friends you make you honestly make just randomly talking about things you like.

How full is your friends list? Do you know all of them? Do you ever clean it out?

- Surprisingly my friends list is really full. I know all of them, and have interacted a fair amount of time with them. Whether it be through role playing, through random conversations, or charities. I have had to clean my friends list out a few times. Many people that left/were hacked I took off my friends list. Others I took off because of drama between them and another person on my friends list.

Do you ever meet people who get uppity because you won't add them randomly?

- Fairly often. I don't take it to heart though because it's not like they knew me nor I knew them. Just another stranger on the planet. I don't try to know them all.

[Mississippi Black Velvet]

I'm paranoid by nature so any random adds I get have me wondering what the person wants. Thankfully I don't get hardly any, knock on wood.

But those that I do have on my friends list are there because I've talked to them extensively and obviously like them enough to consider them a friend. Even if I don't talk to them on a regular basis because small talk is beyond me. :c

[Florabora]

1. Nah I don't like random adds. It always throws me off and I'm like, "Where did they find me?? And why didn't they just talk to me first?"
2. Yes.
3. Not that full. 10 users and one is an NPC, so technically only 9. I know everyone on there but only talk to a few regularly. I clean out my friend list every few months.
4. No...
5. Again, no, but I will say this: I used to add people randomly ALL THE TIME in towns. I was like 11 or 12 years old at the time. I just wanted to see who'd accept so I could chat them up. When people rejected my request, I remember I'd be pretty confused about it. Like, "Aw, why'd they reject my request? I'm super nice!" But of course I get why now. It's just something I grew out of I guess. Most of the people who send random adds to others do it not to annoy anyone, I can assure you that. They just wanna have people on their friend list, lol. c:

[Espeonel]

I've only had two random adds. One I declined because their bio said "they liked yuri but not gay stuff" ( burning_eyes ) and someone else looked all right from their bio and added them, but they have yet to talk to me and I to them. Not sure where that last one is going.

[~ Aki - Fairy ~]

As far as I'm concerned there's a reason it's called a friendslist - the whole point is that it's a list of your friends. If I haven't the foggiest who you are, you're obviously not my friend and thus you don't belong on my list of friends. If you want to be on there, we ought to have interacted at least a few times and I shouldn't have to go to your profile/post history to figure out who you are/how you might know me.

That said I have accepted requests from newbies I've welcomed before, but that's just me trying to be nice (and as soon as I get a begging PM they're gone). Otherwise, if I don't know you and we haven't conversed, I'm not accepting the request but instead will just decline and move on.

[DYRL]

I rarely add people because I'm a forgetful ********.

But to me, "I don't add people unless..." is unnecessary and a step up from "edgy pre-teen" lingo. lol

[Zetsubou Usagi-Kuma]

gaia_nitemareleft KUMA is speaking: gaia_nitemareright

Do you like random adds? If so, why? If not, what are your reasons?
I hate them. On my old account I accepted them, never talked to them after that. The only two that did talk to me only wanted something and I'm pretty sure that one of them used another account to hack and ban me.
Do you prefer to talk to people before you add them? If not, why not?
Yes, although I don't accept friend requests nor do I add. It's better to know who you want to befriend before...friending them. Learned that the hard way.
How full is your friends list? Do you know all of them? Do you ever clean it out?
I have five friends: 3NPCs, my BFF, and boyfriend. I just accept friend requests to those I know in real life. (Wow, I must sound b****y. DERP)
Do you ever meet people who get uppity because you won't add them randomly?
It's been awhile since I've gotten one, but yup.
Any horror funny stories about random adds?
Not that I can remember. I do remember on my old account that someone asked for a donation, because I looked "rich" (my account worth had to be like...400k and during that time, that was pretty "rich" ) and I told them that I only donated to friends (now I donate to anyone when I have the funds) and so they tried to add me. I declined. They tried again. I declined. Then they got miffed.

[Nenanah]

Do you like random adds? If so, why? If not, what are your reasons?
I dread them, I have social anxiety and people randomly adding me weird me out. Then rejecting them makes me feel horrible. D:

Do you prefer to talk to people before you add them? If not, why not?
Yes, I mainly only add people that are active in my guilds. I have to know you well before I start randomly messaging you and stuff.

How full is your friends list? Do you know all of them? Do you ever clean it out?
My list is very small, I know everyone on it fairly well though. Some I even know in real life.

Do you ever meet people who get uppity because you won't add them randomly?
I haven't been in that situation, I don't go out looking for conversations or anything like that sooo...

Any horror funny stories about random adds?
Not really.