What's it like to be the definition of fear, the vision of intimidation.
I wonder what its like to tote pistols, be the coductor to the choir
of handhelds, that pulls triggers that starts the song that makes the
bullets sing a musical. I wonder wat it like to be the reason a mother
has lost a daughter, the person that took away a sister's brother. I
wonder how someone can sleep at nights knowing they've taken the
life of another. Half the times its over some usless altercation,
caused by some avoidable misunderstanding. I wonder what its like
to kill a n***a, be so ice cold, people walk past you and shiver. But
like a top lets spin this scenario 540, i wonder wat its like to stare
down the barrel of a shotty. Having your mind wonder down the
chamber.... bang!!! Your mind is now a theater, Hot flashes. Back
flashes; back to the times, when you shot a lil n***a, still pleading for
his life, you pulled the trigger. You erased his life, with ya index
finger, no concience, this was jus all in a days work for you.....right
Mr.Gangsta? Now back to reality, as you're there staring into the steel you
begin to relax, knowing its your destiny. Yet and still you can't
help but wonder how your life wound up in tragidy, where da hell
did you go wrong, what caused all this inanity? Now all your hopes
and dreams are torn assunder. Now your waiting, for the thunder of
the hammer, where this nightmare can end, and you antisipate,
going beneathe the dirt, and everything is over. But in these last few
moments you remember, how it all started, how crime became
your life and how you loved it. You remember when you was real
little, and ya daddy, used to love your mother, then, everything was
good, and living was treasured.
Then that day that changed everything, when a three niggaz tryina join a gang killed your mother
and Father. With tear filled eyes you relive the horror as you see
the terror plastered on the face of your mother. You now remember
how you screamed horror. The tears trickle from your eyes, and
create huge puddles of salt filled water.
You ask God over and over, how He could let this happen, Your
overwhelmed with grief and anger when you think He doesn't
answer your prayer. So two years later after moving in with your
second foster mother, who beats and abuse you, who only wants
you for a few more government dollars, thats the only purpose in
which she uses you, you vow to never cry another tear and instead,
make other heart's bleed, and eyes cry tears. You now see your self at
eighteen, in the world, with a few possessions, and a close friend
called Beretta. You go from bust-down to shortie, popin
which eva n***a that tries to disrespect thee. To drugs, your
addicted, and to your gang your dedicated. big hustler; baller, shot
caller, you put God no where in your affair, you threw Him on the
back burner matter of fact, to you, He jus another Blown a** n***a.
But back to....
The niggaz that got the muzzle to your forehead, gettin ready to
close the curtains on your life story still playing cinimatically within your
forehead. They say, "any last words"
You laugh and say "Hell yeah, B***ches there's no
heaven for a gangsta, meet me in hell where you too, will get
devoured by the fire........."
Then in a second it's over *Click*...There's the big bang effect
and everything gets all quiet; you wake up in a cold sweat, your
breathing is heavy, a sigh is released, knowing that what you just saw
was nothing but a bad dream. That you only saw something that
was played on the big screen, or on a video game disk. You're
trembling now because the dream was all too real. You understand
that for someone somewhere the latter was not a dream, it's reality,
not just a very bad scene. You thank God above for the visions
you've just seen because it lets you know your life is not as bad as it
seems. Now you fall to your knees and thank God above, that you're
not the man in your dreams.
smiley_gurlx3
My names Elmo(tagg name). and i love this guy names Evergreen(tagg name) and he's so super sweet, exept when he's drunk, lol. jk. i went out with him for a while and we still talk, but it kinda...hurts..to talk to him. he moved outta town, oh yeah and his sister is my BEST FRIEND! so i hang out with her alot, and she looks up to him so i hear about him alot too. i love em both! theyre great.! ohh yeah if you were wondering why i wrote this...i needed the money and the forums give yu money wink thnxx for reading lol
smiley_gurlx3
My names Elmo(tagg name). and i love this guy names Evergreen(tagg name) and he's so super sweet, exept when he's drunk, lol. jk. i went out with him for a while and we still talk, but it kinda...hurts..to talk to him. he moved outta town, oh yeah and his sister is my BEST FRIEND! so i hang out with her alot, and she looks up to him so i hear about him alot too. i love em both! theyre great.! ohh yeah if you were wondering why i wrote this...i needed the money and the forums give yu money
wink thnxx for reading lol