MERC CORP! lit/semi hub for MERCS! Open for All

Are you a mercenary looking for work?

I sure am! SHOW ME THE MONEY!!	22.2%	[ 4 ]
I'm actually a trans-dimensional turtle whose father is a half demon. Tell me I'm original BABY!	11.1%	[ 2 ]
Nope.	5.6%	[ 1 ]
Isn't everyone a mercenary on Gaia?	5.6%	[ 1 ]
I came for the free hotdogs and beer. All I see is beer...	16.7%	[ 3 ]
*Stains is in the poll* "What the hell is this!! Click me or die!"	38.9%	[ 7 ]
Total Votes:			[ 18 ]

[The Sauce of Legend]

Stains spun around in his rusting computer chair. He kicked his legs around sporadically, holding the balls of his feet in the palms of his grubby mitts as the chair lazily twirled him about to stare at the smash fest his inner sanctum had become. Pizza boxes littered the foyer and the distinct stench of rotting possum hung upon the air like a persistent stalker, the nigh immortal merc taking a deep, thought provoking breath in.

"Man, that stinks like s**t!" He sighed dreamily and hugged himself.

"My s**t."

It was good to live on your own!

[The Sauce of Legend]

Stains pulled back the string of the Compound-X11 Quad-Death Accumulator Pentacross edition limited Fury type .0001 drop rating BANG BOW. "BAAAANG BOOOW!" He bellowed like Tarzan letting one of the furious five shot bursts off with a satisfying twang of the rip-cord string. A lone Tur-duck-en (Turkey stuffed with duck stuffed with chicken) sat awkwardly pinned up upon the marble slab affront the main lobby. The arrows neared....


********]

Obviously that is the noise it would make. "Of course! Who knew science could be so cool!" He picked up a flaming slab of tenderized Duck-en. Lifting his signature mask to his nose he stuffed his grubby mouth hole where food generally went in, slapping his chapped lips noisily. "Or delicious!"

[The Sauce of Legend]

Upon the fourth floor...

"Ten thousand and one...Ten thousand and two.." Stains hefted a rusting lead block with a cowbell handle high over his masked visage, the dim lighting causing the immense weight to cast a shadow over the shirtless merc's shimmering bod. He was sweating profusely, abs o' steel glistening out like ********' stacks of..um..steel. "Yea-heeeh." He groaned, slagging the weight back into the towering pile of ancient workout equipment. "MAN. A work out like that deserves a MONSTER APPETITE TO BACK IT UP." He screamed to himself, heartily slapping his sternum in a frantic drum beat. The room was comprised of a massive space filled with steam, slippery weights, and the occasional jump rope, all crammed into a godless mountain in the corner stacked so high it was absolutely dangerous to one's health to even attempt gathering a weight from such an unstable pile of...weights. The pile groaned, and Stains eyed it cautiously. "Whoa girl, easy now." It nearly toppled, then steadied upon it's awkward base....

"Good girl!"

He began whistling poorly and made his way to descend towards the bottom floor via the spiral staircase nearest the far wall. But not before snatching a complimentary Stains proof sauna towel to dry off his drenched bod! "Ahhh! The starchy texture of your own product line!" He vigorously rubbed at his back and thighs, slapping at his back with the towel like a self punishing priest of some archaic self abuse order. "You love it you dirty dog..YOU LOVE IT!!"

[The Sauce of Legend]

Stains tapped about on his computer. He watched some YouLube videos before playing some Oldgrounds games until his butt fell asleep in his swivel chair...

[The Sauce of Legend]

Stains smashed the keyboard against his face, then bashed his skull straight through the computer's screen. He rose, screen busted over his head, swiveling and roaring at nothing in particular. "I AM AN ANDROID I AM A ROBOTMAN!!" He beeped and booped, tripping over several wires to crash against several other computers next to a stack of haphazardly placed C4...

[The Sauce of Legend]

Stains slammed his hand down upon the loud speaker intercom thingie bobber whatever. "TAMMIE!" A moment of silence and the overhead speakers lulled out Merc Corp's only receptionist's sultry voice, "Yes Mr. Stains?"

"I need those files on my desk!"

"The files are on your desk."

"********]

Click!

Stains sat back, groaning and spinning in his computer chair. Oh yeah, the busted computer was still on his head like some cubed motorcycle helmet.

"Gaia blows!"

[Rune Slessiane]

((Do you need some company dear? ))

[The Sauce of Legend]

Stains stood at the front of his own personal beach. "It's actually a desert!" He pointed out to me, his conscious narrator. Oh, it was a desert come to think of it. The leviathan of a gutted warship stood high above the cooling dunes, wind clicking sand into stone along the vast expanse outward like a timeless song. It was a chant that couldn't be taught, but felt inside where the heartbeat low and true to a rhythm very few could still remember. Mesas like sleeping giants seemed to lurk out in the ragged scape where the night made them into anything the mind desired, the nocturnal creatures of the moment awakening to begin their lives anew. A split of sunlight still laid over the shimmering horizon where flickers of green meshed into crystal spurts of amber and maroon, the insane mercenary looking off towards such a beautiful sight wide eyed in silence. He didn't have anything to say at the moment, for such beauty even he knew needed to be taken in, not spat all about like some fool at a banquet. He felt the heat of his home planet's star slipping off of him like warm palms to his cold cheeks pulling away, taken and looked towards in a certain dismay that could only be found in the gaze of the lonely, the forgotten and intolerably selfish.

His eyes scrunched up and a wave of emotions rolled over him. He felt for his mask and lurched forward, stabbing pains building over the area right above his heart suddenly. He fell to one knee, eyes growing fuzzy while the world sucked back into fissures of spotting ivory drops, a crackle of static breaking over his ears so close...it felt like it was inside his skull. He ripped at his mask until he felt it slip away.

His real face showed out, and he stepped forward into the moon's glow.

He stared up as tears streamed down, his split of blonde hair glinting under the moon's naked light. "I know you see. It's a beautiful moon outside." He struggled to stand. He felt along the warship's arced hull for support, looking down and away from that which reminded him the most of his losses, of his pain of failure. "********' moon. [******** you." He spit in it's direction and managed to make a trail of mucus that splayed out several yards ahead upon a nearby dune, his mind already motioning him to place his mask back on. It was his comfort blanket...

It was his real face now.

Standing finally Stains leaned against the front of Merc Corp, cursing about the moon and how he wished it would just collide into the earth already..

[Rune Slessiane]

A vast silhouette of winged creature would be cast upon the parking lot, growing darker, larger, as the being it belonged to descended from the sky, great gusts of wind sweeping along the ground, the sound of tremendous wings beating against the air echoing growing louder.

The white dragon landed rather gracefully for a creature of her size, wings helping her control her descent. Soundlessly her back feet would touch the pavement first, and then her front fell forward with a resonating thud, her full weight impacting onto the ground. One more beat against the air and then her wings would fold elegantly along her back.

Muscles flexed and shifted beneath white scales the color of polished pearls that reflected multiple hues of gold like a multifaceted jewel in the light. At sixteen feet high and thirty seven feet long the dragon was a beast, with horns upon her great head that trailed to ridges along her spine, ending at the tip of a long sleek whip like tail that swayed behind her. Talons dug into the dirt upon her landing, digging rivets and kicking up dirt as she shifted. The dragon slowly blinked her golden-flecked emerald multifaceted eyes as she peered around, a snake like tongue flicking out to lick her blood stained maw, a growl rumbling from deep within her chest.

Her draconian energy rippled vibrantly, flowing out like she had been a pebble that had been thrown into still water. The scent of blood was thick around her, energy of the wild hunt still pulsating energetically, laced within the chaotic song that resonated around her like an aura, whispering like a specter. The song was created to induce insanity, indulge chaos. Whoever cared to listen to the haunting tune that was a constant hum around her would find the chains of their sanity being tugged upon.

She was a creature of chaos, and had been called back from the mountains where she hunted, lured by the symphony of her lover, by the uncontrollable desire to bathe in his presence. After feasting on anything living she could find within the forests, the overwhelming appetite to appease another carnal hunger burned in her blood .Only his hauntingly seductive melody could quell her rising emotions, and the restless life that stirred within her womb.

A hum resonated from the back of her throat, her haunting aria, the insane diseased melody that infected any who opened their mind to hear. The beautiful white monstrosity would begin to sing, a sound normally never heard from a creature such as her. An enticing lullaby, the sound of icicles and little sleigh bells mixed into one impacting combination would echo like an audible aura around her.

As the dragon sang, flames the color of clear cut sapphires would began to lick across her shimmering scales, indication of her impending transformation. The song became intense, her great head rose, tilting back, and like a wolf would howl at the moon the dragon would sing to the stars. As the chaotic aria swelled the flames would encompass her form, emitting frigid air, sparks of lighting dancing within the conflagration.

The freezing blaze would engulf her, only leaving her darker shifting silhouette visible from within. Then in an explosion of blue fire the dragon was gone, and a lithe slender woman stood in its place. There was just something unreal and eerie about her. Her face, somewhat luminous, had a pale tone to it, with luminescent multifaceted eyes the color of molten gold. This enchanting face was framed by white silky tresses that tumbled over her shoulders, fading to gold at the ends that coiled at her hips. No clothing adorned her form, only white tresses offered partial covering, giving tantalizing peaks of her full breasts. But the dragoness seemed unconcerned by her nudity, instead relishing in the feeling of the air on her bare flesh. Her figure, slender and seemingly fragile, also looked to be light as a feather. Indeed she appeared to glide as she moved to take that first step towards the building, the song still resonating from her throat.

Another lose cannon, gone bi-polar,
I created the sound of madness. Wrote the book on pain.
Sing me your chaos, the dark disease.
Ever reaching ever flowing, your shadow extended,
I'll infect the masses.

[The Sauce of Legend]

"And were on the hiiiighway, to da', thunda' DOME!!!" Stains head banged over a static plagued stereo, the ambient sound of the 80's scratching out from the shoddy if not ancient boom box. He had been drinking, as evidenced by the multiple liquor bottles scattered all over the front entrance of his warship, some shattered, others shorn in half by what probably was a katana swipe or a ninja star throw. He chugged back his good ol' Rot gut, patting his blue abs. He seemed absolutely satisfied as well as absolutely hammered, a swift toss sending the half empty bottle off into the dunes below.

"Didn't need you any ways! Whore!" He spit after the bottle, his mask half way skewed to just above his nose so that his lower jaw showed out, jutting and handsomely rugged. "What was her name again.."

"Felicity! Oh you old whooorish girl! Felicity the wooorld to meee!!"

He wiped sluggishly at his drooling lips, foot resting on the screeching boom box's front display.

"I love Top Gun."

Looking over towards his tapped keg he fumbled for his drinking glass, reaching deep into the sand next to him to stir it up. The inside was clung over by a thin sheen of desert sand. "Hmm.." He blew out most of it and deemed it worthy. Stumbling ever so gracefully over to the keg he pumped at it's tap, making sure to get it nice and pressurized...

"Goin' on the highway, to da' TRUNDLE ZONE!!"

[The Sauce of Legend]

Stains looked through his Omni-tech binoculars towards the wreckage a long ways away in the dunes ahead. "Smells like trouble. And burnt ham." He scratched at his a** before sitting back down on the roof of his sky scraper ship, snuffing at the odd crash in the distance. Sipping at his diet iced tea he grunted before continuing where he had left off in his Candy Crush high score.

[********, gonna get it this time.."

[The Sauce of Legend]

Stains tapped several papers together, stapling them calmly and neatly as one binding to file them away in an orderly fashion. He thumbed open a blank manila folder and quickly scribbled 'Taxes' over it's thumbnail. Huffing he surveyed his fifth floor office. Soothing elevator music bantered in from the receptionist's lobby a door away, and the temperature was toasty enough given that the desert had recently fallen under an unnatural chill. Probably more daemon magic from Canada. Those Canadians were always up to being ******** assholes, so he didn't doubt the cold came from those maple leaf eating bastards. "Canadians. Doing nothing special since '73. Hell, when's the last time someone from Canada graduated from college? Need to nuke Toronto.." He pulled up another file folder and scribbled, 'Plans to destroy Toronto, Canada', before returning to his taxes, sighing heavily at his own distaste and ultimate disgust for French Canadians.

Being a merc wasn't always exciting.

[The Sauce of Legend]

Stains was busy balancing a grenade on the tip of a hydrogen imbued contact missile when the phone upon his centerpiece marble slab began ringing. He sighed, haphazardly fumbling the two objects until they both clambered to the ground, the grenade rolling off under a couch somewhere and the missile beginning to hiss violently from a punctured valve node on it's curved siding. "Well that's not good." He decided it was a problem best taken up after the phone was answered. Hell, he wanted to see it blow up. Anything for some excitement.

"Merc Corp, greatest mercenary who's ever lived speaking?"

"Wha..I...Is this really you..This can't be real." Stains held his hand to his face shakily, leaning his forehead heavily against the marble slab. He gripped the phone and gagged slightly. He started to cry.

"This isn't really you? Is this a joke are you hurting me again? Tammie, I need my receptionist.." He fumbled for the loudspeaker control and fell just short, his knees going weak. He leaned against the slab and cried until he was forced to pry his mask off...

"I thought I'd never hear your voice again, my love, my everything."

"Why call now! Why so long...."

[The Sauce of Legend]

It was a dream, and from it Stains awoke sobbing until it faded from sudden memory, a throbbing infection clinging to his mind the constant reminder of the dream's ultimate message though it seemed to disappear as quick as it had vibrantly lived. It fed from his negative urges, growing fat on his worry and past worn anxiety brought on by love and the sickness shackled on from it's sudden leaving.. How many nights did he dream of her? How many times did he say her name alone in the darkness, or to the empty room to hear her name resound the walls until it all came back to him. He would plead with her in his words though she hadn't seen him for years. He spoke to the nothing as if she could hear him and feel his thoughts of her, his fingers wringing out to hold that which only a dusty memory contained like a mummy exhumed from it's casket too soon, his lips clapped close over teeth clenched from waves of pain running through his heart. "I'm sorry." He would say her name then, say it again and try to feel her. He could only feel a rising in him, like fire under his skin. It didn't matter, his pain or his opinion.

She hadn't spoken to him for years, and here he fiddled his fingers, muscles tightening and grip of his thoughts loosening, wishing to know more but always kept to his own fantasies, delusions that simply cannot be and never would. And yet he hoped. And yet he still thought of her every day and every night.

Though he still said her name in the dead silence, hoping she felt him in her faraway heart.

Gathering himself up Stains ached all around. The stress of an ailing heart always kept one weak, so he shook his bones out, cracking his neck back and forth to get the feeling back into his sleeping toes.

"Chelsea." He said her name one more time, than rose to march over towards his glass paned shower set. He turned the knob of his shower and shirked it's curtains open, slowly peeling away his jump suit.

"I'm always thinking of you."

The bathroom door closed and Stains proceeded to take a short yet refreshing shower.

[Merc Malice]

Malice came down to the old ship that seemed to be the holding grounds for the mercenaries she heard -- The slender woman with jet black hair, dark blue eyes, in a tight leather jump suit, with military style nylon harness, and belts holding two pistols 9mm Berettas, couple small boxs to hold clips, couple flash bangs, a machete shield to her back, a simple combat knife in her boot. The woman walked silently, like any professional, with a duffel bag hanging off her right shoulder. Long leather trench coat hiding most of her gear. Malice looked about with cold calculating eyes, as she went head long into the ship.