My Metroid Fanfiction (In progress)

[stockholm fairy]

Metroid prime: Ridley's revenge

Samus was traveling through the Universe, on her way to the galactic federation. Earlier that day Samus had received a hologram from a standing commander, saying that they were in need of her assistance right away. With the galactic federation's ship in her sight she thought "it has to be horrible if they need me, I've seen what most soldiers are capable of." as the hanger opened, she slowly parked her ship. she hurried to the commander.

"Samus, I'm glad you came. As you can see, some of the galactic federation's power supply plants have been invaded." He said pointing at a hologram. "Barely any survivors were found, but the soldiers we did recover described the attacker as "A gigantic reptile". we need you to get to the bottom of this." Samus replied" Commander, you have no idea what you're dealing with...But, I've beaten this beast and I will do it again." "Then Samus, get to work. I've taken the liberty of downloading the map to your suit." Samus head off, ready for anything.

To be continued

[Saindroue]

TepigTocino

Metroid prime: Ridley's revenge

Samus was traveling through the universe, on her way to the Galactic Federation. Earlier that day, Samus had received a hologram from a standing commander, saying that they were in need of her assistance right away. With the Galactic Federation's ship in her sight, she thought "It has to be horrible if they need me, I've seen what most soldiers are capable of." As the hanger opened, she slowly parked her ship, and hurried to the commander.

"Samus! I'm glad you came. As you can see, some of the Galactic Federation's power supply plants have been invaded." He said pointing at a hologram. "Barely any survivors were found, but the soldiers we did recover described the attacker as a"gigantic reptile". We need you to get to the bottom of this." Samus replied, " Commander, you have no idea what you're dealing with...But, I've beaten this beast and I will do it again." "Samus, get to work. I've taken the liberty of downloading the map to your suit." Samus headed on her way, ready for anything.

To be continued

I'm sure I left out some grammar mistakes and passive vs. active voice, but that's all I really see.

[stockholm fairy]

I knew about most of the words I didn't capitalize, I was going to fix them when I start the next part of the Fanfiction. But the rest I'm hadn't realized.