Closed

[Sanctus_StaMaria]

An interesting start to your story, but I have two constructive criticisms..
1) Spelling/wrong word - there are a couple of these... proofreading helps
2) I'm not sure why you're saying 'd**k'. It didn't seem to be being used as a swear, so there shouldn't be any harm to just writing it {i guess it's just a quirk in your writing style perhaps}

[Lone_BatWolf_Tsukuri]

Sanctus_StaMaria

An interesting start to your story, but I have two constructive criticisms..
1) Spelling/wrong word - there are a couple of these... proofreading helps
2) I'm not sure why you're saying 'd**k'. It didn't seem to be being used as a swear, so there shouldn't be any harm to just writing it {i guess it's just a quirk in your writing style perhaps}

can you delete this post please...I'm closing all my topics and would like for everyone to delete their posts Thanks