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Joan Darr
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Yeah. Men's penises can be real fussy jerks.

Because penises too are utterly disconnected from the socialised brain. D: You're probably being facetious but whatever.
BTW, vaginas can totally have preferences informed by racism too.

So, really? The standard is now set where the only people undeserving of radical accusations and contempt are those that are permanently flaccid/frigid to prove that they're wholly indiscriminate? Really?


>Implying that it's impossible to have NO racial preferences

Seriously, who the ******** ARE you people?

>Doesn't actually care what people say and just reads whatever she wants to read when people talk
And who are you again?


Seriously, that's what your posts have been. That people CAN'T exist without racial preferences without either having absolutely NO standards are all and therefore always being horny, OR being asexual and aromantic and therefore NEVER getting hot because they find NOTHING hot.

If that hasn't been the point you've made this last page, then PLEASE enlighten me to what your actual attempts at rebuttal have been to that other poster.
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Vixianna
Trollzors Vader

You may have no preference, but not everyone is you. It's probably a good thing too, because that would actually get really boring, really quick.


Why? No really why? Why is it necessary that you have hard and fast rules on what race or ethnicity you date for your dating life to be "interesting"? Seriously.

It isn't as if I don't find NO ONE unattractive, because that isn't true. I do think some people are hotter than others. However, none of that falls along racial lines, along hair or eye color lines, along skin tone lines, ect. That is, there are plenty of men I find unattractive, but it has nothing to do with them being of X group type. It's usually something specific to their combination of features.(rarely is it one feature unless it's something BIG)

So if you could explain how having no specific hard and fast rules would make life "boring" please?

Trollzors Vader

Yes, a good personality can change an initial thought on someone, but physical attraction is a big part of human mating. That's a completely normal part of sexuality.


Yes, and I do find men sexually attractive. I am not asexual. And I do find some men not attractive. I'm also demi-romantic though, so my continued attraction to someone is based on more than their looks. That is, I'm not going to bang someone I find uninteresting, unintelligent, bad personality, ect. even IF I think their body is hot.

Example, I think Paul Ryan is very cute. He's also a goddamn misogynist idiot I wouldn't touch with a nine foot pole.

Trollzors Vader

Realizing who you are, and what is attractive to you is a normal part of your growth as a sexual being, and while you personally have no preference, you can't expect this of everyone.


Why not? I'm not asking people to think everyone(individuals) is equally attractive, and I'm not asking them to have no preferences, sexuality, or standards at all. As I DO find some men more attractive than others, and many unattractive at all.(I do have standards!) What I'm asking is that they don't cut out an entire demographic of MILLIONS or more based on the fact they are X ethnicity, without even taking a look at them. Or getting to know them. That's what I'm saying.

That's not unreasonable as a request, because having no "would never date" list isn't the same as having NO standard.

You are obviously racist above and beyond your dating preferences(your language comment gave you away), and so I'm not talking about people like you.


I openly said I embraced that fact about me... Are you saying just having a group you would not date is not racist, because then you are disagreeing with the op.

Would you hold an issue with someone cutting out millions because they are a single gender over another? That's another physical trait you are born with, and cannot change about yourself that... Oh, can lead to discrimination and being excluded from the personal preferences of individuals in who they find attractive. If that's not an issue, why is the color of your skin an issue? Under it people still have a personality you could get to know if you got over the whole, not being the preferred gender, or skin color thing. But people aren't just what's under neath, as wonderful as that might be. People also do have a side of them that is skin deep, and it's utter denial not to realize that can matter in building a relationship, especially if this is a sexual relationship.
Joan Darr's avatar

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Vixianna
What is it with people assuming that having no preferences for race, hair, eye, or skin color means you'll get a boner for ANYTHING?

There are other parts of the face and body to find attractive/unattractive you know that have nothing to do with hard and fast rules about arbitrary social groups. Just saying.

I don't get hot for everything, and I don't have a racial preference(remember this thread is about to the point of exclusivity), how ******** surprising.

Is it that hard for you to imagine not cutting out an entire group that you think people either have to have a perpetual boner or be completely slacked in order for it to work?

Ok do I have this right?

Morally superior to have no preference:
"race, hair, eye, or skin color"

Doesn't matter:
"other parts of the face and body to find attractive/unattractive you know that have nothing to do with hard and fast rules about arbitrary social groups"

So if one has a preference for weight that all of a sudden has nothing to do with hard and fast rules about arbitrary social groups as you say, you can be expected to be reasonable and refrain from calling them a chauvinistic anorexia supporter, yes?

But when race is involved, " scream scream RACIST RACIST RACIST scream scream " ?

Why?
Joan Darr's avatar

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Yeah. Men's penises can be real fussy jerks.

Because penises too are utterly disconnected from the socialised brain. D: You're probably being facetious but whatever.
BTW, vaginas can totally have preferences informed by racism too.

So, really? The standard is now set where the only people undeserving of radical accusations and contempt are those that are permanently flaccid/frigid to prove that they're wholly indiscriminate? Really?


>Implying that it's impossible to have NO racial preferences

Seriously, who the ******** ARE you people?

>Doesn't actually care what people say and just reads whatever she wants to read when people talk
And who are you again?


Seriously, that's what your posts have been. That people CAN'T exist without racial preferences without either having absolutely NO standards are all and therefore always being horny, OR being asexual and aromantic and therefore NEVER getting hot because they find NOTHING hot.

If that hasn't been the point you've made this last page, then PLEASE enlighten me to what your actual attempts at rebuttal have been to that other poster.

Are you delusional? I have just told you that you misinterpreted me and you are blatantly ignoring that.

"undeserving of radical accusations and contempt" is the key. You haven't justified why other qualities are exempt. i.e. why we shouldn't inclusively berate anyone for their preference on anything, if we are to do this for race. It currently reeks of special pleading.
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Trollzors Vader


I openly said I embraced that fact about me... Are you saying just having a group you would not date is not racist, because then you are disagreeing with the op.


No that's not what I'm saying; you don't read very well do you? I'm saying having no race on your "would never date" list ISN'T going to make you like every person on the planet. Like I've told other posters, there are other things about people to like/dislike other than their supposed racial group. And a lot more to like or dislike about faces than being from X race(which when it comes to non-whites doesn't tell you much of anything in America.)

Trollzors Vader


Would you hold an issue with someone cutting out millions because they are a single gender over another?


No, because they aren't equalivilant, and I really need to write up that change to the OP for my friend. Gender=/= as race for a variety of reasons, partially social, partially biological(though not that race is biological...)

Trollzors Vader


That's another physical trait you are born with, and cannot change about yourself that... Oh, can lead to discrimination and being excluded from the personal preferences of individuals in who they find attractive.


Once again that's not the same thing. And trans* people of all races would tell you otherwise about "changing".

Trollzors Vader


If that's not an issue, why is the color of your skin an issue?


Skin color is colorism and not racism. Considering the "black" race in America goes from the very very light to the very dark, colorism is a different problem.(and one that also plagues the black community for a different reason.)

Trollzors Vader


Under it people still have a personality you could get to know if you got over the whole, not being the preferred gender, or skin color thing.


Once again gender=/=skin color.

Trollzors Vader


But people aren't just what's under neath, as wonderful as that might be. People also do have a side of them that is skin deep, and it's utter denial not to realize that can matter in building a relationship, especially if this is a sexual relationship.


Yes it CAN be a problem IF you aren't attracted to them, but that's on an individual level and not the same as saying an entire demographic is just butt ugly to you.(some people can say that they find X group pretty/attractive objectively even if it doesn't tickle their personal fancy, but that's not what MOST people who are open about it say.)
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Joan Darr
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What is it with people assuming that having no preferences for race, hair, eye, or skin color means you'll get a boner for ANYTHING?
There are other parts of the face and body to find attractive/unattractive you know that have nothing to do with hard and fast rules about arbitrary social groups. Just saying.
I don't get hot for everything, and I don't have a racial preference(remember this thread is about to the point of exclusivity), how ******** surprising.
Is it that hard for you to imagine not cutting out an entire group that you think people either have to have a perpetual boner or be completely slacked in order for it to work?

Ok do I have this right?
Morally superior to have no preference:
"race, hair, eye, or skin color"
Doesn't matter:
"other parts of the face and body to find attractive/unattractive you know that have nothing to do with hard and fast rules about arbitrary social groups"
So if one has a preference for weight that all of a sudden has nothing to do with hard and fast rules about arbitrary social groups as you say, you can be expected to be reasonable and refrain from calling them a chauvinistic anorexia supporter, yes?
But when race is involved, " scream scream RACIST RACIST RACIST scream scream " ?
Why?


Because discrimination involving race is racist by definition of the word? Is that unclear or something?

And the word you are looking for is sizist or fat phobic(in general the bias is heavily against fat people in America). And yeah, a lot of our opinions on fat or thin people are informed by stereotypes backed up by neither science nor real personal experience with these groups.

Thin people are considered smarter, healthier, and more attractive out right than fatter folks. However, this discussion isn't about my fat activism(I can get into it if you'd like), but about race. So let's stay on topic shall we?(and I DO call people out on weight preferences, funny ******** that? No I'm NOT a hypocrite why do you ask?)
So, if someone doesn't date in their own gender because they don't swing that way, are they homophobic?
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I don't doubt that it is racism, to some extent, for some people.

However, there are others, like myself, who are not attracted to people of a different ethnicity (in general) on the basis of bone//facial structure. Certain traits that appeal to me, for example, are almost exclusive to Caucasians of a certain descent. (Note, I'm even further limiting my preferences within that group, as the traits are rare even among them.) I would like to believe that is the case for many others, but I wouldn't be able to say for sure.
Joan Darr's avatar

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Vixianna
Joan Darr
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What is it with people assuming that having no preferences for race, hair, eye, or skin color means you'll get a boner for ANYTHING?
There are other parts of the face and body to find attractive/unattractive you know that have nothing to do with hard and fast rules about arbitrary social groups. Just saying.
I don't get hot for everything, and I don't have a racial preference(remember this thread is about to the point of exclusivity), how ******** surprising.
Is it that hard for you to imagine not cutting out an entire group that you think people either have to have a perpetual boner or be completely slacked in order for it to work?

Ok do I have this right?
Morally superior to have no preference:
"race, hair, eye, or skin color"
Doesn't matter:
"other parts of the face and body to find attractive/unattractive you know that have nothing to do with hard and fast rules about arbitrary social groups"
So if one has a preference for weight that all of a sudden has nothing to do with hard and fast rules about arbitrary social groups as you say, you can be expected to be reasonable and refrain from calling them a chauvinistic anorexia supporter, yes?
But when race is involved, " scream scream RACIST RACIST RACIST scream scream " ?
Why?


Because discrimination involving race is racist by definition of the word? Is that unclear or something?

And the word you are looking for is sizist or fat phobic(in general the bias is heavily against fat people in America). And yeah, a lot of our opinions on fat or thin people are informed by stereotypes backed up by neither science nor real personal experience with these groups.

Thin people are considered smarter, healthier, and more attractive out right than fatter folks. However, this discussion isn't about my fat activism(I can get into it if you'd like), but about race. So let's stay on topic shall we?(and I DO call people out on weight preferences, funny ******** that? No I'm NOT a hypocrite why do you ask?)

Do you call people out on gender/sex preferences too?
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Joan Darr

Are you delusional? I have just told you that you misinterpreted me and you are blatantly ignoring that.


I stated what I thought you said, and then said if this was incorrect to please clarify your actual position, and you call me delusional for it? Yeah ok.

Joan Darr

"undeserving of radical accusations and contempt" is the key. You haven't justified why other qualities are exempt. i.e. why we shouldn't inclusively berate anyone for their preference on anything, if we are to do this for race. It currently reeks of special pleading.


So your point is that only people who are bone everything or fridge cold are "undeserving of radical accusations and contempt" by the standard I'm positing? The problem is this is your interpretation of what I said, and then I interpretation what you were saying about me on top of that, which is where the confusion came in I suppose.

In that regard, I'll just respond to your main thrust that I'm asking that you make an "except" for race. Notice I've consistently posted about hair and eye color preferences, as well as skin tone, and even weight most recently. I'm an equal opportunity fighter, especially when people are making their decisions not based on any interaction that they've had, but on a series of stereotypes from the media and peer groups.

That is that everyone who's blonde is a slutty bimbo, that everyone who is fat is an unhealthy stinky lard boat, that everyone who is black is criminal, ect. And that because of these reasons (consciously or unconsciously) and not because of any actual experience or even actual reasoning at all, they are unattractive to them. This is odd, even when people in these X group hit all of the criteria they've otherwise set out. That is if they didn't identify as "black" or "Asian" or ect. then they'd likely be interested.

As for why we shouldn't berate anyone for their other choices? I'm not saying we shouldn't, especially when it results in "rules" about an entire group, and the decisions are not made on an individual basis.

That's my point, when it's to the point of exclusivity of an entire group and not made on a case by case basis.

Secondly, and I'll post on this more later, to act like race is equivalent to any of the other suggested groups, as if it's something that's just 'pasted on yey' like someone's dye job, is ridiculous. We went through a lot of trouble as a country to make race an actual "thing", so its not a social group equal to blonde hair. Race has actual meaning and implications in this country when it comes to outcomes like it or not. So NO you can't just treat people's race as if it's their hair color.(and that's something quite frankly, whites are want to do. That is they don't have to think about their race on a regular basis, so they think it has no meaning or very little effects to everyone else, when that is frankly not at all the case.)

If you are wondering about special pleading, it's because at the end of the day race IS different, a special case, as compared to eye color bro. And unlike you, I don't have the luxury of pretending my race is like the fact my eyes are brown now instead of blue.
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Joan Darr

Do you call people out on gender/sex preferences too?


Well no, because weight, and height, and "racial"(race isn't real biologically, and certainly not in the way its divided in America) preferences have no biological basis.

Homosexuality on the other hand, does. Just the same, in America we have a culture that severely penalizes homosexual activity and trains people to ignore any type of same sex attraction so that typically only those with the strongest attractions express them.

In fact, there have been plenty of other cultures where homoerotic interactions were more accepted, and therefore much more common.(but it would be ridiculous to state that the genes that underlie homo-exclusive behavior were more common in the past.)

The result is, while attraction to a specific gender has a biological underpinning, just about everything else...does not.
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Vixianna

The result is, while attraction to a specific gender has a biological underpinning, just about everything else...does not.


Not necessarily. There is a good chance that some of it has to do with which "mate" we feel (on a purely instinctual level) will provide the best offspring. (Or whose genes are most compatible with our own.) Albeit, this doesn't take into account many factors, there is at least /some/ basis in this.
Joan Darr's avatar

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Vixianna
Joan Darr

Do you call people out on gender/sex preferences too?


Well no, because weight, and height, and "racial"(race isn't real biologically, and certainly not in the way its divided in America) preferences have no biological basis.

Homosexuality on the other hand, does. Just the same, in America we have a culture that severely penalizes homosexual activity and trains people to ignore any type of same sex attraction so that typically only those with the strongest attractions express them.

In fact, there have been plenty of other cultures where homoerotic interactions were more accepted, and therefore much more common.(but it would be ridiculous to state that the genes that underlie homo-exclusive behavior were more common in the past.)

The result is, while attraction to a specific gender has a biological underpinning, just about everything else...does not.

And for bisexuals that lean or, prefer one way or the other? They're sexist, right?
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The result is, while attraction to a specific gender has a biological underpinning, just about everything else...does not.

Not necessarily. There is a good chance that some of it has to do with which "mate" we feel (on a purely instinctual level) will provide the best offspring. (Or whose genes are most compatible with our own.) Albeit, this doesn't take into account many factors, there is at least /some/ basis in this.


Yeah but which mate we like doesn't have anything to do with "sameness". In general, we are attracted to the biologically novel, that is especially, those whose immune system is most dislike our own. We are most likely to get the best mix of genes from someone outside of our ethnicity(not race), and so it makes biological sense for you to be more attracted on a purely instinctual level to someone with whom you share the fewest genes in this regard.

This is not necessarily on a racial basis, and in fact, has very little to do with "race" in preference as we understand it. The same reason mixed race individuals have such a hard time getting transplants is the same that drives people to , supposedly on a biological basis, prefer mates of a different ethnicity in the first place. Unusual, unique combinations of exterior cell makers that make up the immune system.

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