What is Love without Lust?

[ratgirl34]

Amateur Hour

ChurBun

So i got into a discussion with a guy who says he would remain a virgin for life if the person he liked didn't want to have sex, ever.

My opinion in this matter.

That wouldn't be love. Sure, he is willing to sacrifice that, but the other person?


In my opinion, Love comes with Lust. When its Love, sex would be a way of expressing it with the other person. Embracing the other person. Becoming "one".

Of course, it's not a main factor, but it is necessary, in my opinion.

If you were to sacrifice sex in a relationship, like, FOREVER, i don't see how it would work. Of course like i said, sex isn't that important, in fact i'd be pleased having sex once a week, once every two weeks or so. Well, as long as its not once every 2 months... LOL! But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person. Feeling the other's warmth and such. Each human being goes through that.

If a grown up person comes up to you and says he is a virgin, would you believe him? No, of course not, it's hard to believe on someone's word about something so common like having Sex. Lust.

My opinion goes on and on but hard to type it, so yea, what do you think?

I think our society revolves too much around sex and our minds are grossly perverted. It sounds like you believe being sexually active with the one you love is the defining act to profess your love to someone, regardless of how many times you reminded us "sex isn't that important".

Funny enough, you pretty clearly rebuke your entire post within your post:

ChurBun

But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person

It's just a way of expressing love. Believe it or not, you can show affection, love, your desire for the other person without sticking your p***s in her v****a. For a lifetime, too. A hug or a kiss, a word of affirmation, an act of service, quality time. All good things that keep the relationship healthy(sex isn't the relationship).

Sex is held as the ultimate end-all in many marriages(undeniably more often than not the man's thought process), but I believe that's exactly the mindset that ends many of those marriages.

That mentality certainly killed my last relationship. I felt more loved when he talked about exactly how photosynthesis works, or we gushed over Greek mythology, than when we cuddled. I felt more sexually attracted to him then too.

When he started putting pressure on for sex... I felt like he only saw a v****a with legs. There was no depth or love there. And it killed any attraction I had for him.

[I AM R U]

Sex is but one way to demonstrate love - sex can happen without love, and love can happen without sex :/

[Sugarbeary]

you should love everyone, but that isn't the love we are talking about, we are talking about romantic love.

It is kinda unbiblical to be in a relationship with someone who isn't attractive, and attractive is subjective. It can't be the only reason, there are many qualities that come before do you find her attractive.

With that attraction, lust is something you should battle against, until you are married. It should be conquered, but it should be there.

[Ojino]

The Legendary Guest

ChurBun

Amateur Hour

ChurBun

So i got into a discussion with a guy who says he would remain a virgin for life if the person he liked didn't want to have sex, ever.

My opinion in this matter.

That wouldn't be love. Sure, he is willing to sacrifice that, but the other person?


In my opinion, Love comes with Lust. When its Love, sex would be a way of expressing it with the other person. Embracing the other person. Becoming "one".

Of course, it's not a main factor, but it is necessary, in my opinion.

If you were to sacrifice sex in a relationship, like, FOREVER, i don't see how it would work. Of course like i said, sex isn't that important, in fact i'd be pleased having sex once a week, once every two weeks or so. Well, as long as its not once every 2 months... LOL! But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person. Feeling the other's warmth and such. Each human being goes through that.

If a grown up person comes up to you and says he is a virgin, would you believe him? No, of course not, it's hard to believe on someone's word about something so common like having Sex. Lust.

My opinion goes on and on but hard to type it, so yea, what do you think?

I think our society revolves too much around sex and our minds are grossly perverted. It sounds like you believe being sexually active with the one you love is the defining act to profess your love to someone, regardless of how many times you reminded us "sex isn't that important".

Funny enough, you pretty clearly rebuke your entire post within your post:

ChurBun

But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person

It's just a way of expressing love. Believe it or not, you can show affection, love, your desire for the other person without sticking your p***s in her v****a. For a lifetime, too. A hug or a kiss, a word of affirmation, an act of service, quality time. All good things that keep the relationship healthy(sex isn't the relationship).

Sex is held as the ultimate end-all in many marriages(undeniably more often than not the man's thought process), but I believe that's exactly the mindset that ends many of those marriages.

God you people seriously dont get it. You said it yourself, i said it was a way of expressing love. CAN YOU GET ON ******** TOPIC! What i said on the rest is that i find it IMPOSSIBLE for two people who are healthy and don't have any ill or whatever that would make sex impossible to remain virgins through their whole life together, which obviously wouldnt work.

What you haven't done is demonstrate why it "obviously" wouldn't work. You've just repeated your personal opinion, which is that you don't believe its possible, and so what? Your opinion and two-fifty will get you a cup of coffee but it won't make your friend's decisions any of your business. In your friend's scenario, the other person does not want sex and you THINK that would not be love. SO WHAT.

All you have is your perspective on love, and what one person finds loving another person does not. You wouldn't believe an adult who claimed to be a virgin, but you have no way of knowing if they really are, even if they claimed they were not, unless you had actually engaged in sex with them yourself! In your opinion, it's necessary. Your opinion goes on and on but in the end, your friend's decisions about what he does with his own genitals are none of your business.

HAH! You just said it yourself! Its none of my business but when i express my opinion about and clearly state its his decision he makes a fuss about it.

[Ojino]

I AM R U

Sex is but one way to demonstrate love - sex can happen without love, and love can happen without sex :/

Well we are just talking when it is love. Its just my opinion that when you get with someone, with pure love and such, you'd end up demonstrating it through sex, if even just once.

[Ojino]

ratgirl34

Amateur Hour

ChurBun

So i got into a discussion with a guy who says he would remain a virgin for life if the person he liked didn't want to have sex, ever.

My opinion in this matter.

That wouldn't be love. Sure, he is willing to sacrifice that, but the other person?


In my opinion, Love comes with Lust. When its Love, sex would be a way of expressing it with the other person. Embracing the other person. Becoming "one".

Of course, it's not a main factor, but it is necessary, in my opinion.

If you were to sacrifice sex in a relationship, like, FOREVER, i don't see how it would work. Of course like i said, sex isn't that important, in fact i'd be pleased having sex once a week, once every two weeks or so. Well, as long as its not once every 2 months... LOL! But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person. Feeling the other's warmth and such. Each human being goes through that.

If a grown up person comes up to you and says he is a virgin, would you believe him? No, of course not, it's hard to believe on someone's word about something so common like having Sex. Lust.

My opinion goes on and on but hard to type it, so yea, what do you think?

I think our society revolves too much around sex and our minds are grossly perverted. It sounds like you believe being sexually active with the one you love is the defining act to profess your love to someone, regardless of how many times you reminded us "sex isn't that important".

Funny enough, you pretty clearly rebuke your entire post within your post:

ChurBun

But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person

It's just a way of expressing love. Believe it or not, you can show affection, love, your desire for the other person without sticking your p***s in her v****a. For a lifetime, too. A hug or a kiss, a word of affirmation, an act of service, quality time. All good things that keep the relationship healthy(sex isn't the relationship).

Sex is held as the ultimate end-all in many marriages(undeniably more often than not the man's thought process), but I believe that's exactly the mindset that ends many of those marriages.

That mentality certainly killed my last relationship. I felt more loved when he talked about exactly how photosynthesis works, or we gushed over Greek mythology, than when we cuddled. I felt more sexually attracted to him then too.

When he started putting pressure on for sex... I felt like he only saw a v****a with legs. There was no depth or love there. And it killed any attraction I had for him.

Well, he was wanting to pressure you for it, i wouldn't call that love and i get sex isn't the most important thing. Its just a way of expressing love, in fact i would do okay just to cuddle with the person i'm with, make them feel safe and warm. But obviously i'd get aroused by it but i wouldn't do Anything, y'know, unless the guy i'm with wants to.
But again i don't see it as a main factor, just a way of expressing it. I would be totally fine with not doing it for a while and just cuddle, spend time together and stuff like that. Because i know there are other ways of expressing love.

[ratgirl34]

ChurBun

The Legendary Guest

ChurBun

Amateur Hour

ChurBun

So i got into a discussion with a guy who says he would remain a virgin for life if the person he liked didn't want to have sex, ever.

My opinion in this matter.

That wouldn't be love. Sure, he is willing to sacrifice that, but the other person?


In my opinion, Love comes with Lust. When its Love, sex would be a way of expressing it with the other person. Embracing the other person. Becoming "one".

Of course, it's not a main factor, but it is necessary, in my opinion.

If you were to sacrifice sex in a relationship, like, FOREVER, i don't see how it would work. Of course like i said, sex isn't that important, in fact i'd be pleased having sex once a week, once every two weeks or so. Well, as long as its not once every 2 months... LOL! But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person. Feeling the other's warmth and such. Each human being goes through that.

If a grown up person comes up to you and says he is a virgin, would you believe him? No, of course not, it's hard to believe on someone's word about something so common like having Sex. Lust.

My opinion goes on and on but hard to type it, so yea, what do you think?

I think our society revolves too much around sex and our minds are grossly perverted. It sounds like you believe being sexually active with the one you love is the defining act to profess your love to someone, regardless of how many times you reminded us "sex isn't that important".

Funny enough, you pretty clearly rebuke your entire post within your post:

ChurBun

But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person

It's just a way of expressing love. Believe it or not, you can show affection, love, your desire for the other person without sticking your p***s in her v****a. For a lifetime, too. A hug or a kiss, a word of affirmation, an act of service, quality time. All good things that keep the relationship healthy(sex isn't the relationship).

Sex is held as the ultimate end-all in many marriages(undeniably more often than not the man's thought process), but I believe that's exactly the mindset that ends many of those marriages.

God you people seriously dont get it. You said it yourself, i said it was a way of expressing love. CAN YOU GET ON ******** TOPIC! What i said on the rest is that i find it IMPOSSIBLE for two people who are healthy and don't have any ill or whatever that would make sex impossible to remain virgins through their whole life together, which obviously wouldnt work.

What you haven't done is demonstrate why it "obviously" wouldn't work. You've just repeated your personal opinion, which is that you don't believe its possible, and so what? Your opinion and two-fifty will get you a cup of coffee but it won't make your friend's decisions any of your business. In your friend's scenario, the other person does not want sex and you THINK that would not be love. SO WHAT.

All you have is your perspective on love, and what one person finds loving another person does not. You wouldn't believe an adult who claimed to be a virgin, but you have no way of knowing if they really are, even if they claimed they were not, unless you had actually engaged in sex with them yourself! In your opinion, it's necessary. Your opinion goes on and on but in the end, your friend's decisions about what he does with his own genitals are none of your business.

HAH! You just said it yourself! Its none of my business but when i express my opinion about and clearly state its his decision he makes a fuss about it.

You can tell people that you aren't convinced that two people can be in love and never have sex all you want. But when you present that opinion as 'You guys are dating but never have -and never will- have sex? You aren't really in love.' That's where you've crossed the line into 'it's none of your damn business.'

[ratgirl34]

ChurBun

ratgirl34

Amateur Hour

ChurBun

So i got into a discussion with a guy who says he would remain a virgin for life if the person he liked didn't want to have sex, ever.

My opinion in this matter.

That wouldn't be love. Sure, he is willing to sacrifice that, but the other person?


In my opinion, Love comes with Lust. When its Love, sex would be a way of expressing it with the other person. Embracing the other person. Becoming "one".

Of course, it's not a main factor, but it is necessary, in my opinion.

If you were to sacrifice sex in a relationship, like, FOREVER, i don't see how it would work. Of course like i said, sex isn't that important, in fact i'd be pleased having sex once a week, once every two weeks or so. Well, as long as its not once every 2 months... LOL! But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person. Feeling the other's warmth and such. Each human being goes through that.

If a grown up person comes up to you and says he is a virgin, would you believe him? No, of course not, it's hard to believe on someone's word about something so common like having Sex. Lust.

My opinion goes on and on but hard to type it, so yea, what do you think?

I think our society revolves too much around sex and our minds are grossly perverted. It sounds like you believe being sexually active with the one you love is the defining act to profess your love to someone, regardless of how many times you reminded us "sex isn't that important".

Funny enough, you pretty clearly rebuke your entire post within your post:

ChurBun

But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person

It's just a way of expressing love. Believe it or not, you can show affection, love, your desire for the other person without sticking your p***s in her v****a. For a lifetime, too. A hug or a kiss, a word of affirmation, an act of service, quality time. All good things that keep the relationship healthy(sex isn't the relationship).

Sex is held as the ultimate end-all in many marriages(undeniably more often than not the man's thought process), but I believe that's exactly the mindset that ends many of those marriages.

That mentality certainly killed my last relationship. I felt more loved when he talked about exactly how photosynthesis works, or we gushed over Greek mythology, than when we cuddled. I felt more sexually attracted to him then too.

When he started putting pressure on for sex... I felt like he only saw a v****a with legs. There was no depth or love there. And it killed any attraction I had for him.

Well, he was wanting to pressure you for it, i wouldn't call that love and i get sex isn't the most important thing. Its just a way of expressing love, in fact i would do okay just to cuddle with the person i'm with, make them feel safe and warm. But obviously i'd get aroused by it but i wouldn't do Anything, y'know, unless the guy i'm with wants to.
But again i don't see it as a main factor, just a way of expressing it. I would be totally fine with not doing it for a while and just cuddle, spend time together and stuff like that. Because i know there are other ways of expressing love.

If there are other ways to show love then why is sex a requirement for love to be romantic love? What if I had never intended to have sex with my boyfriend (and lets assume he was okay with that) is it still not romantic love even though we dote on each other just like a couple of lovebirds? If every other part of the way we interact screams 'THIS WAS MEANT TO BE' then why is it not romantic love?

[Ojino]

ratgirl34

ChurBun

ratgirl34

Amateur Hour

ChurBun

So i got into a discussion with a guy who says he would remain a virgin for life if the person he liked didn't want to have sex, ever.

My opinion in this matter.

That wouldn't be love. Sure, he is willing to sacrifice that, but the other person?


In my opinion, Love comes with Lust. When its Love, sex would be a way of expressing it with the other person. Embracing the other person. Becoming "one".

Of course, it's not a main factor, but it is necessary, in my opinion.

If you were to sacrifice sex in a relationship, like, FOREVER, i don't see how it would work. Of course like i said, sex isn't that important, in fact i'd be pleased having sex once a week, once every two weeks or so. Well, as long as its not once every 2 months... LOL! But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person. Feeling the other's warmth and such. Each human being goes through that.

If a grown up person comes up to you and says he is a virgin, would you believe him? No, of course not, it's hard to believe on someone's word about something so common like having Sex. Lust.

My opinion goes on and on but hard to type it, so yea, what do you think?

I think our society revolves too much around sex and our minds are grossly perverted. It sounds like you believe being sexually active with the one you love is the defining act to profess your love to someone, regardless of how many times you reminded us "sex isn't that important".

Funny enough, you pretty clearly rebuke your entire post within your post:

ChurBun

But see, it's just a way of expressing love for the other person

It's just a way of expressing love. Believe it or not, you can show affection, love, your desire for the other person without sticking your p***s in her v****a. For a lifetime, too. A hug or a kiss, a word of affirmation, an act of service, quality time. All good things that keep the relationship healthy(sex isn't the relationship).

Sex is held as the ultimate end-all in many marriages(undeniably more often than not the man's thought process), but I believe that's exactly the mindset that ends many of those marriages.

That mentality certainly killed my last relationship. I felt more loved when he talked about exactly how photosynthesis works, or we gushed over Greek mythology, than when we cuddled. I felt more sexually attracted to him then too.

When he started putting pressure on for sex... I felt like he only saw a v****a with legs. There was no depth or love there. And it killed any attraction I had for him.

Well, he was wanting to pressure you for it, i wouldn't call that love and i get sex isn't the most important thing. Its just a way of expressing love, in fact i would do okay just to cuddle with the person i'm with, make them feel safe and warm. But obviously i'd get aroused by it but i wouldn't do Anything, y'know, unless the guy i'm with wants to.
But again i don't see it as a main factor, just a way of expressing it. I would be totally fine with not doing it for a while and just cuddle, spend time together and stuff like that. Because i know there are other ways of expressing love.

If there are other ways to show love then why is sex a requirement for love to be romantic love? What if I had never intended to have sex with my boyfriend (and lets assume he was okay with that) is it still not romantic love even though we dote on each other just like a couple of lovebirds? If every other part of the way we interact screams 'THIS WAS MEANT TO BE' then why is it not romantic love?

There comes the lust part. See my friend thinks he is the most logical person and thinks far from humans. Genetics and s**t. So, i went to be a bit more logic and mentioned Lust. Even those who have not had sex would feel aroused, if they aren't asexual that is, which he isnt. You can handle by yourself of course, but at some point it would break. Thats what i think, but if there were to not be any sexual contact, at all, i just consider it wouldn't be the kind of love i'm referring to. Obviously i told him it wouldn't be love because first the girl doesnt have feelings for any human being, at all. Not even sexual. And he would be willing to sacrifice something in order to try to gain her love. They barely and he is already saying he is in love with her. When you do those things, when its with that kind of person who doesnt fall in love, wtf is it then? Dont tell me it would be love. I just think that the fullest most common "love" would involve sex from time to time,not necessarily all the time, but in my opinion humans would give in to lust if they get aroused enough.

[ratgirl34]

ChurBun

ratgirl34

ChurBun

ratgirl34

Amateur Hour

I think our society revolves too much around sex and our minds are grossly perverted. It sounds like you believe being sexually active with the one you love is the defining act to profess your love to someone, regardless of how many times you reminded us "sex isn't that important".

Funny enough, you pretty clearly rebuke your entire post within your post:



It's just a way of expressing love. Believe it or not, you can show affection, love, your desire for the other person without sticking your p***s in her v****a. For a lifetime, too. A hug or a kiss, a word of affirmation, an act of service, quality time. All good things that keep the relationship healthy(sex isn't the relationship).

Sex is held as the ultimate end-all in many marriages(undeniably more often than not the man's thought process), but I believe that's exactly the mindset that ends many of those marriages.

That mentality certainly killed my last relationship. I felt more loved when he talked about exactly how photosynthesis works, or we gushed over Greek mythology, than when we cuddled. I felt more sexually attracted to him then too.

When he started putting pressure on for sex... I felt like he only saw a v****a with legs. There was no depth or love there. And it killed any attraction I had for him.

Well, he was wanting to pressure you for it, i wouldn't call that love and i get sex isn't the most important thing. Its just a way of expressing love, in fact i would do okay just to cuddle with the person i'm with, make them feel safe and warm. But obviously i'd get aroused by it but i wouldn't do Anything, y'know, unless the guy i'm with wants to.
But again i don't see it as a main factor, just a way of expressing it. I would be totally fine with not doing it for a while and just cuddle, spend time together and stuff like that. Because i know there are other ways of expressing love.

If there are other ways to show love then why is sex a requirement for love to be romantic love? What if I had never intended to have sex with my boyfriend (and lets assume he was okay with that) is it still not romantic love even though we dote on each other just like a couple of lovebirds? If every other part of the way we interact screams 'THIS WAS MEANT TO BE' then why is it not romantic love?

There comes the lust part. See my friend thinks he is the most logical person and thinks far from humans. Genetics and s**t. So, i went to be a bit more logic and mentioned Lust. Even those who have not had sex would feel aroused, if they aren't asexual that is, which he isnt. You can handle by yourself of course, but at some point it would break. Thats what i think, but if there were to not be any sexual contact, at all, i just consider it wouldn't be the kind of love i'm referring to. Obviously i told him it wouldn't be love because first the girl doesnt have feelings for any human being, at all. Not even sexual. And he would be willing to sacrifice something in order to try to gain her love. They barely and he is already saying he is in love with her. When you do those things, when its with that kind of person who doesnt fall in love, wtf is it then? Dont tell me it would be love. I just think that the fullest most common "love" would involve sex from time to time,not necessarily all the time, but in my opinion humans would give in to lust if they get aroused enough.

Well you're friend is in a tough situation. I have no real opinion on your friend.

But asserting that it can't be romantic love if there is and never will be sex is not very logical of you. It's already been pointed out that there have been numerous sexless relationships in real life. A much more sensical statement would be that you can't understand that kind of relationship because you don't know what it's like to be without a sex drive, or to be with a person you haven't or wouldn't have sex with.

[Ojino]

ratgirl34

ChurBun

ratgirl34

ChurBun

ratgirl34

Amateur Hour

I think our society revolves too much around sex and our minds are grossly perverted. It sounds like you believe being sexually active with the one you love is the defining act to profess your love to someone, regardless of how many times you reminded us "sex isn't that important".

Funny enough, you pretty clearly rebuke your entire post within your post:



It's just a way of expressing love. Believe it or not, you can show affection, love, your desire for the other person without sticking your p***s in her v****a. For a lifetime, too. A hug or a kiss, a word of affirmation, an act of service, quality time. All good things that keep the relationship healthy(sex isn't the relationship).

Sex is held as the ultimate end-all in many marriages(undeniably more often than not the man's thought process), but I believe that's exactly the mindset that ends many of those marriages.

That mentality certainly killed my last relationship. I felt more loved when he talked about exactly how photosynthesis works, or we gushed over Greek mythology, than when we cuddled. I felt more sexually attracted to him then too.

When he started putting pressure on for sex... I felt like he only saw a v****a with legs. There was no depth or love there. And it killed any attraction I had for him.

Well, he was wanting to pressure you for it, i wouldn't call that love and i get sex isn't the most important thing. Its just a way of expressing love, in fact i would do okay just to cuddle with the person i'm with, make them feel safe and warm. But obviously i'd get aroused by it but i wouldn't do Anything, y'know, unless the guy i'm with wants to.
But again i don't see it as a main factor, just a way of expressing it. I would be totally fine with not doing it for a while and just cuddle, spend time together and stuff like that. Because i know there are other ways of expressing love.

If there are other ways to show love then why is sex a requirement for love to be romantic love? What if I had never intended to have sex with my boyfriend (and lets assume he was okay with that) is it still not romantic love even though we dote on each other just like a couple of lovebirds? If every other part of the way we interact screams 'THIS WAS MEANT TO BE' then why is it not romantic love?

There comes the lust part. See my friend thinks he is the most logical person and thinks far from humans. Genetics and s**t. So, i went to be a bit more logic and mentioned Lust. Even those who have not had sex would feel aroused, if they aren't asexual that is, which he isnt. You can handle by yourself of course, but at some point it would break. Thats what i think, but if there were to not be any sexual contact, at all, i just consider it wouldn't be the kind of love i'm referring to. Obviously i told him it wouldn't be love because first the girl doesnt have feelings for any human being, at all. Not even sexual. And he would be willing to sacrifice something in order to try to gain her love. They barely and he is already saying he is in love with her. When you do those things, when its with that kind of person who doesnt fall in love, wtf is it then? Dont tell me it would be love. I just think that the fullest most common "love" would involve sex from time to time,not necessarily all the time, but in my opinion humans would give in to lust if they get aroused enough.

Well you're friend is in a tough situation. I have no real opinion on your friend.

But asserting that it can't be romantic love if there is and never will be sex is not very logical of you. It's already been pointed out that there have been numerous sexless relationships in real life. A much more sensical statement would be that you can't understand that kind of relationship because you don't know what it's like to be without a sex drive, or to be with a person you haven't or wouldn't have sex with.

I guess you are right about that sweatdrop
Maybe i was kinda off about it because he got all pissy about it. Whenever someone expresses their opinion, even though he sayshe accepts opinions, he will try to force hisopinion into your head, so i was bitchy and pissy and not very clear i guess XD

But regardless, at least personally i don't see how relationship where two healthy beings who do feel lust and such would last without sex. I mean lets say they get married and have a child and stop havign sex. Well, i consider that to be love. Maybe because they gave birth to a child out of that love. Now if it is someone who is asexual and such, i understand it.

[ratgirl34]

ChurBun

ratgirl34

ChurBun

ratgirl34

ChurBun

Well, he was wanting to pressure you for it, i wouldn't call that love and i get sex isn't the most important thing. Its just a way of expressing love, in fact i would do okay just to cuddle with the person i'm with, make them feel safe and warm. But obviously i'd get aroused by it but i wouldn't do Anything, y'know, unless the guy i'm with wants to.
But again i don't see it as a main factor, just a way of expressing it. I would be totally fine with not doing it for a while and just cuddle, spend time together and stuff like that. Because i know there are other ways of expressing love.

If there are other ways to show love then why is sex a requirement for love to be romantic love? What if I had never intended to have sex with my boyfriend (and lets assume he was okay with that) is it still not romantic love even though we dote on each other just like a couple of lovebirds? If every other part of the way we interact screams 'THIS WAS MEANT TO BE' then why is it not romantic love?

There comes the lust part. See my friend thinks he is the most logical person and thinks far from humans. Genetics and s**t. So, i went to be a bit more logic and mentioned Lust. Even those who have not had sex would feel aroused, if they aren't asexual that is, which he isnt. You can handle by yourself of course, but at some point it would break. Thats what i think, but if there were to not be any sexual contact, at all, i just consider it wouldn't be the kind of love i'm referring to. Obviously i told him it wouldn't be love because first the girl doesnt have feelings for any human being, at all. Not even sexual. And he would be willing to sacrifice something in order to try to gain her love. They barely and he is already saying he is in love with her. When you do those things, when its with that kind of person who doesnt fall in love, wtf is it then? Dont tell me it would be love. I just think that the fullest most common "love" would involve sex from time to time,not necessarily all the time, but in my opinion humans would give in to lust if they get aroused enough.

Well you're friend is in a tough situation. I have no real opinion on your friend.

But asserting that it can't be romantic love if there is and never will be sex is not very logical of you. It's already been pointed out that there have been numerous sexless relationships in real life. A much more sensical statement would be that you can't understand that kind of relationship because you don't know what it's like to be without a sex drive, or to be with a person you haven't or wouldn't have sex with.

I guess you are right about that sweatdrop
Maybe i was kinda off about it because he got all pissy about it. Whenever someone expresses their opinion, even though he sayshe accepts opinions, he will try to force hisopinion into your head, so i was bitchy and pissy and not very clear i guess XD

But regardless, at least personally i don't see how relationship where two healthy beings who do feel lust and such would last without sex. I mean lets say they get married and have a child and stop havign sex. Well, i consider that to be love. Maybe because they gave birth to a child out of that love. Now if it is someone who is asexual and such, i understand it.

The downfall of face to face conversations is that you can`t edit what you've said after you've said it. And people can't sit back and digest what you've said either, especially if they feel like their opinion is being challenged.

[Ojino]

ratgirl34

ChurBun

ratgirl34

ChurBun

ratgirl34

ChurBun

Well, he was wanting to pressure you for it, i wouldn't call that love and i get sex isn't the most important thing. Its just a way of expressing love, in fact i would do okay just to cuddle with the person i'm with, make them feel safe and warm. But obviously i'd get aroused by it but i wouldn't do Anything, y'know, unless the guy i'm with wants to.
But again i don't see it as a main factor, just a way of expressing it. I would be totally fine with not doing it for a while and just cuddle, spend time together and stuff like that. Because i know there are other ways of expressing love.

If there are other ways to show love then why is sex a requirement for love to be romantic love? What if I had never intended to have sex with my boyfriend (and lets assume he was okay with that) is it still not romantic love even though we dote on each other just like a couple of lovebirds? If every other part of the way we interact screams 'THIS WAS MEANT TO BE' then why is it not romantic love?

There comes the lust part. See my friend thinks he is the most logical person and thinks far from humans. Genetics and s**t. So, i went to be a bit more logic and mentioned Lust. Even those who have not had sex would feel aroused, if they aren't asexual that is, which he isnt. You can handle by yourself of course, but at some point it would break. Thats what i think, but if there were to not be any sexual contact, at all, i just consider it wouldn't be the kind of love i'm referring to. Obviously i told him it wouldn't be love because first the girl doesnt have feelings for any human being, at all. Not even sexual. And he would be willing to sacrifice something in order to try to gain her love. They barely and he is already saying he is in love with her. When you do those things, when its with that kind of person who doesnt fall in love, wtf is it then? Dont tell me it would be love. I just think that the fullest most common "love" would involve sex from time to time,not necessarily all the time, but in my opinion humans would give in to lust if they get aroused enough.

Well you're friend is in a tough situation. I have no real opinion on your friend.

But asserting that it can't be romantic love if there is and never will be sex is not very logical of you. It's already been pointed out that there have been numerous sexless relationships in real life. A much more sensical statement would be that you can't understand that kind of relationship because you don't know what it's like to be without a sex drive, or to be with a person you haven't or wouldn't have sex with.

I guess you are right about that sweatdrop
Maybe i was kinda off about it because he got all pissy about it. Whenever someone expresses their opinion, even though he sayshe accepts opinions, he will try to force hisopinion into your head, so i was bitchy and pissy and not very clear i guess XD

But regardless, at least personally i don't see how relationship where two healthy beings who do feel lust and such would last without sex. I mean lets say they get married and have a child and stop havign sex. Well, i consider that to be love. Maybe because they gave birth to a child out of that love. Now if it is someone who is asexual and such, i understand it.

The downfall of face to face conversations is that you can`t edit what you've said after you've said it. And people can't sit back and digest what you've said either, especially if they feel like their opinion is being challenged.

Yea. Not to mention when people use some personal stuff of yourself against your own opinion....

[Lijah_Scottech]

Sex is not a universal desire.

There are people who are not sexually attracted to others, but still have sex because they enjoy it.
There are people who may or may not be sexually attracted to others, but still not want to/not enjoy having sex.

Personally, I am sexually attracted to others, but I do not want to have sex. I prefer masturbation to sexual encounters with others.

It is completely possible to be in a romantic relationship with someone/people and not have sex.

[Michael Noire]

lust is largely a psychological addiction to chemicals released during exposure to completely different chemicals produced by hormone levels. When you get old, those hormones naturally depreciate and sex drive comes almost purely from psychological, rather than chemical side effects.Women hit a sexually active stage earlier than men, and then it fades rapidly, then jumps during their middle age years, then plummets. For men, it starts a few years after women, but then persists and reaches an apex somewhere between teens and 20s, and then starts to wind down toward the same time the women hit their second phase. By the time the woman's second phase ends, both she and he have almost non existent sex drive except for remnants of memories. so typically, somewhere between 55 and 70, both partners will have a dead sex drive unless they were into fetish or nymphomaniac effects. Considering the human lifespan can frequently approach 120 years, and many may reach 100+, you basically have half your life with the other person if that's what you really want.

People yapping about sex and dying at 30 are children.