So does this make me a bad person?

[Vosi]

Master SBK

Vosi

I don't get it. If her scale is the moral bar of the society she lives in she's a bad person; there is nothing to discuss since it is relative to the scale meaning we must throw aside our own scales and use that of the society in question.

but she's asking for our opinions, which are based on our own scales of morality.

Which is why we need a common scale in the first place. Most of us here will say no, but if the question were "is stealing without need right?" a lot of mixed answers would come up. She presented that scale for us in her OP, and if we deviate we're doing nothing more than causing an ungodly amount of worthless confusion. The congruence of our current outlook isn't sufficient.

[imaginary people]

XxX-Villainy-XxX

romapri chu

I'm still a young girl.
I am a straight A student.
I plan on going to college and becoming a psychiatrist.
I am very active in many clubs in my school.
I volunteer at various places whenever I have the time.
I am very close to my family, and I have never had problems with the law.
I do not drink, or smoke.

But very recently I engaged in sexual affairs with my boyfriend.
I am not married to him obviously - and we are both underaged.

I personally don't believe that participating in sexual acts with him makes me a bad person. Though I am still a "virgin", what is your take on this? Do you think that just because a person has been sexually active though they are not married and are young, that it makes them a bad person?

Just curious to know your opinions. C:

Well technically you're not a "virgin" anymore. You had sex you silly little girl. blaugh

No, you're not a bad person but what you did isn't entirely excusable if you're a Christian. Now, other people will tell you "It's perfectly fine to have sex whenever you want with whoever you want as long as it's monogamous", and if you agree with that than good for you, just do whatever you think is right.

Now, I DO think you're a little young to be having sex, that doesn't mean your irresponsible just inexperienced. You have your whole life ahead of you and you need to focus right now on who you are, what you enjoy doing and how you can use that to provide for yourself and any family God sees fit to grace you with. But you're not a bad person just because you had sex. Was what you did a sin in the eyes of God? Yes but God doesn't send kids to hell for being young and in love.

Don't you mean it's a sin in the eyes of man pretending to have the eyes of God? They preach of an all-knowing, forgiving God who loves all of his creations. Sex is one of his creations made to be enjoyed by his creations (why else would our bodies react so pleasantly to it?). Their own laws cancel out the very character of the Being who supposedly created them.
By telling her she's sinning you're perpetuating the myth that sex is evil and should be something she should feel guilty for which is just insane! Why should she feel bad about her instincts telling her to do a perfectly natural act with someone she cares very deeply for? By telling her to feel guilty for it aren't you telling her to be ashamed of the body and the feelings that God gave her? That sounds more like a sin to me than anything that she's been doing.

[Pinque Von Fluffendorken]

Well first of all, how old are you? Secondly you clearly have some feelings of guilt, shame and low moral fiber or you wouldn't have made this thread to ask for other's opinons. You just want validation for something you clearly felt was wrong. If you are indeed that young, you have your whole life to have sex, why do you need to do it right now?

[noemiakamimis]

No, it doesn't make you a bad person.

[Zaige Delecroix]

Provided you are using protection, I don't think there is anything wrong with it at all. It certainly doesn't make you a bad person. I would think you would know that being so smart and everything.

[Ren-ai Eikyu]

No, it does not make you a bad person. Just make sure you know for certain that you like this guy. My fiance, for a long time after we started dating, refused my advances. He "gave" in, but it was after he learned that he truly loved me and that he wanted to be with me forever. We've been together for almost 6 years now, not married, and sexually active.

I, personally, don't suggest going ALL the way unless you know and plan on being together for a long LONG time, though I don't see anything wrong with oral as long as you're careful.

[ancient sugar]

of course it doesnt
its not like u sleep with everyone
its your boyfriend, you should be able to express your feelings deeper

[Plexiglass Prism]

Of course not. Only Christians think that because of what the bible says. Logical people can figure out that there's no harm in it though.

Our society is becoming increasingly okay with not getting married to the person you love. Many couples never marry. So the idea of not being able to have sex outside of marriage is so outdated.

I have sex with my boyfriend because I am very much in love with him. And even if our relationship doesn't last I will never regret the things I've done with him. Because my love for him is true and strong.

Sex is seriously overrated in this department. I don't get why anyone makes it into such a big deal. It's only when you let anyone who you don't love have your body that you are hurting yourself. But if you like and trust a person, there is no harm.

[Sweetpea The Tigress]

Swirled_In_Octane

Its straight sex, nothing is wrong with that.

What if she's 14? She doens't realy give an age, she just says she's young. I'd like to reiterate that I don't think its wrong, just something one must exercise care and control in.

[Jaydoggy]

You aren't harming anyone or yourself, you're both consenting, doesn't sound like anything wrong to me. Just remember to be safe, always use condoms etc and if you think anything's wrong with either of you stop having sex and get tested.

Now had you said "I kick puppies because it's fun," then it'd be a different story! So rest easy knowing you're a good person.

[AshinnIchneumon]

romapri chu

I'm still a young girl.
I am a straight A student.
I plan on going to college and becoming a psychiatrist.
I am very active in many clubs in my school.
I volunteer at various places whenever I have the time.
I am very close to my family, and I have never had problems with the law.
I do not drink, or smoke.

But very recently I engaged in sexual affairs with my boyfriend.
I am not married to him obviously - and we are both underaged.

I personally don't believe that participating in sexual acts with him makes me a bad person. Though I am still a "virgin", what is your take on this? Do you think that just because a person has been sexually active though they are not married and are young, that it makes them a bad person?

Just curious to know your opinions. C:

no, why would you be a bad person for that? you seem to have a pretty good track record, but i would have to actually meet you and have extensive interaction in order to judge you a good or bad person. doesnt seem like it at first glance though.

[QuQuKachoo]

There's no wrong or right answer to your question. Sex before marriage is up to you and your boyfriend and nobody else, and asking for everyone else's opinion on it is only going to confuse you more because everyone is going to have a different one.

[Atrum Faustus]

Right and wrong are subjective. If you see nothing wrong with it, there's nothing wrong with it. But since you're asking the ED's opinion...
As long as you were both willing, I see nothing wrong with it.

However, I'm not sure it was necessarily a smart thing to do. But, since you say you're still a virgin, I assume you mean there was no penetration, and I don't know how that would affect things considering consent laws.

If you do go "all the way", though, use a condom. Not because it's wrong or right, but because it eliminates a whole lot of problems.