Reviewing yourself from various chronological perspectives

[Flip of Darkstar]

I have many habits that I disaprove of, and one of the most prominent is viewing my current self from a future perspective. Not just myself, but my friends, family, and generally everyone.

It's rather arrogant, and a bit haughty, to do this, but I do it anyway. As I said, it's a habit. My peers, not yet completely adults yet not at all children, tend to do things that if I were ten years older I would think was immature and fruitless. Whenever I tell them what I think, I am accused of acting far older than I should, and even that I'm acting like a parent (in the negative manner).

I always find myself doing stupid things, and then feeling deeply ashamed. I'm not old enough to know better, but I'd like to think so. I'm neither mature, nor wise, yet my "future perspective" believes that I should be, and that I am far too childish.

One of my friends has a similar problem, except in the opposite regard. She tends to view things from a past perspective. She never ceases to amaze herself with simple things like managing her own money and even driving (she's been driving for practically ten years). She always finds herself thinking that what she's doing is "so cool", and even though she's older than me, she is so happy that she can hang out with people my age, since we are apparently....<_<...>_>... hip.

But, back to my future perspective. My friends laugh a bit when I tell them that they're going to regret doing some things, and I guess they are a bit right. I should be viewing things from a present perspective. I shouldn't care if my friend is wasting his time by dating that beauty school reject. It's fun, it's not harmful, and at the end of it all, it's fixable.

I think looking at things as if they had already happened is rather unhealthy. My friend recently just got his first girlfriend. And upon meeting her, I laughed out loud. It was funny. I knew the relationship wouldn't last two weeks, and I had already predicted that we'd all be laughing about this issue later. But I was wrong. Three weeks later, we were all laughing about the issue. Laughing about things that happened before they do cannot be healthy.

[beatlzrock]

I know sometimes I do the same thing...and then I think I'm stupid and everyone thinks I'm weird. crying

[guanobaron]

One regard where it is useful to view things from the perspective of your future self:

<img src="http://members.lycos.co.uk/guanobaron/monopolyperv.jpg">

[AtomskIscariot]

A future perspective can be good in many respects. You can avoid many an eventual disappointment with it, which is why I tend to do the same thing, even unconsciously. But there's also a level of beauty in living a life primarily concerned with the present. Somehow, in this idealistic head of mind, a good balance of both might make for a... pretty good perspective, I suppose.

[The Vansin]

Not always so Flip, Sometimes looking at situations as though they had already happened gives one an aloof perspective not able to be achieved by someone who is stuck in the situation. Sometimes this type of thinking can allow us to have a clear mind about a particularly harrowing rut. Where you went wrong, I believe, in the case of your friend and his girlfriend is that you predicted the future, you "looked back" on his situation without fully knowing the particulars about the relationship and made an assumption based on the facts you knew to be true, perhaps they were not. In the case that they were not it is very probable you made a mistake. As for your concern about this type of thinking, my suggestion is to relax. That is what is so amazing about the human mind, it has the ability to learn from its mistakes, this higher level of thinking allows us to be slightly more lax about the patterns in which we react to the world around us. There is truly no reason to be ashamed of this way of thinking, everyone views the world from a diffrent perspective, if this is yours, follow it and learn from it. Just be wary, If you begin to believe you are superior past your age you could be in for a shocking awakening later in life. Dont sweat it Flip, your in your early 20's, you have a long life ahead of you and a long time to make mistakes before they truly matter.

[Anat0lia]

I'm constantly surprised at how insanely moody I've become. Feels good.

[Yxven]

It's good that you're so able to see things from different perspectives, but at the same time, do you really want to live so cautiously?

A few years back, I was trying to convince my brother to play paintball with me. He was convinced that it hurt like hell, so out of my infinite wisdom, I decided I'd prove it didn't hurt by taking some paintballs to my bare chest from two feet away without flinching. I took them and it really didn't hurt, but then I wiped the paint away to reveal the holes in my chest. He decided paintball wasn't the sport for him. I now have two bullet hole scars on my chest. Was it stupid? You betcha. Do I regret it? No, I have another good story to tell, and two beautiful scars that coincidently show off my abs when I reveal them.

As long as failure will not seriously alter your life, you should never fear it, or even try to avoid it. Otherwise, you'll be about as interesting as someone that's never left his house.

[szulikk]

It's good that you're bothered enough about them to worry, but let people make mistakes. It helps them to gain experiences without making you out to be an old nag blaugh . Trust me, I often catch myself doing exactly the same thing.

[Dino]

OMG!

Flip made a REALLY kick a** post that I can reply to without feeling silly. ::pigs fly::

Ok. Joking aside (or is it..?)

I actually think it's an admirable quality to do that. Think about it. How bright are you going to feel 50 years from now when the name you got tattooed on your butt really doesn't apply to your current, or your last few lovers? How 'bout that lovely nose, eyebrow, lip, n****e, clitoris and tongue piercing that will never close up, but forever leave a tiny reminder of itself in you? The ability to reason out natural consequences, and see the possibilities of the future is what separates us from the beasts of the field (or in some cases, CB bump whores).

It's something to be proud of, Flip.

Quote:

I always find myself doing stupid things, and then feeling deeply ashamed. I'm not old enough to know better, but I'd like to think so. I'm neither mature, nor wise, yet my "future perspective" believes that I should be, and that I am far too childish.

Now the rub with this is do you learn anything from those experiences, and try to avoid them in the future? It's all well and good to feel remorse or regret, or even shame, but repeatedly engaging in those actions means that you haven't really begun considering the consequences. THAT is when such forward thinking is pointless.

[know_need_four_names]

oh god my brother is like that. when he is around you can never have any fun gonk

[Amiithrozil]

I look at it this way:

You will physiologically be an adult longer than you will be a child.
You will mentally be an adult longer than you will be a child.

The decisions you make as a child will affect how you will live as an adult, both physiologically and mentally. To be questioning of childhood decisions, then, is infinitely more wise than to be careless.

It's not a black and white issue, however. Of course you will want to enjoy your childhood while you have it, as you only have it for a relatively small portion of your life, but you will not want to suffer the consequences for those decisions in the relatively large portion of your life. The best course of action, then, is to be a discerning individual and make sure that you can deal with the consequences of such decisions during childhood or easily during adulthood.

Being a discerning, cautious individual is nothing to be ashamed of. It is a quality to be admired, and a sign of a strong grip on reality and maturity.

[Flip of Darkstar]

Vansin the Fallen

Not always so Flip, Sometimes looking at situations as though they had already happened gives one an aloof perspective not able to be achieved by someone who is stuck in the situation. Sometimes this type of thinking can allow us to have a clear mind about a particularly harrowing rut. Where you went wrong, I believe, in the case of your friend and his girlfriend is that you predicted the future, you "looked back" on his situation without fully knowing the particulars about the relationship and made an assumption based on the facts you knew to be true, perhaps they were not. In the case that they were not it is very probable you made a mistake. As for your concern about this type of thinking, my suggestion is to relax. That is what is so amazing about the human mind, it has the ability to learn from its mistakes, this higher level of thinking allows us to be slightly more lax about the patterns in which we react to the world around us. There is truly no reason to be ashamed of this way of thinking, everyone views the world from a diffrent perspective, if this is yours, follow it and learn from it. Just be wary, If you begin to believe you are superior past your age you could be in for a shocking awakening later in life. Dont sweat it Flip, your in your early 20's, you have a long life ahead of you and a long time to make mistakes before they truly matter.

Assumptions are not something that I make as a spur of the moment type of thing. Though my friend was a bit blind during his relationship (as most people are), simple acts spoke volumes about the degree of the relationship between them. It was rather comical to view it from "afar", almost like how it is amusing to watch a person stumble around blindfolded. Yet, just as it is funny to watch that blindfolded man slam into random objects, it's also a tad bit sad...

Believing I am superior past my age is probably the most negative way of describing my "future" perspective, as well as the most accurate. I need to learn how to conrtol that arrogance, since apparently my friends find it a bit tiring.

[Flip of Darkstar]

Yxven

It's good that you're so able to see things from different perspectives, but at the same time, do you really want to live so cautiously?

A few years back, I was trying to convince my brother to play paintball with me. He was convinced that it hurt like hell, so out of my infinite wisdom, I decided I'd prove it didn't hurt by taking some paintballs to my bare chest from two feet away without flinching. I took them and it really didn't hurt, but then I wiped the paint away to reveal the holes in my chest. He decided paintball wasn't the sport for him. I now have two bullet hole scars on my chest. Was it stupid? You betcha. Do I regret it? No, I have another good story to tell, and two beautiful scars that coincidently show off my abs when I reveal them.

As long as failure will not seriously alter your life, you should never fear it, or even try to avoid it. Otherwise, you'll be about as interesting as someone that's never left his house.

As far as I can tell, getting shot by a paintball gun is not exactly a testimony to one's genius.
Perhaps when you get really old, like really, really old, when your abs are nothing but a sack of wrinkles, you'll look at your chest and think, "Damn, that was pretty stupid,"

But, to each their own. Scars are not exactly what I consider attractive, so whenever I play paintball, I always wear a nice, padded set of sweats (it may suck when it's hot, but I tend to play more during the winter, where an iced paint ball is not just going to leave a little scar).

[The Vansin]

Flip of Darkstar

Vansin the Fallen

Not always so Flip, Sometimes looking at situations as though they had already happened gives one an aloof perspective not able to be achieved by someone who is stuck in the situation. Sometimes this type of thinking can allow us to have a clear mind about a particularly harrowing rut. Where you went wrong, I believe, in the case of your friend and his girlfriend is that you predicted the future, you "looked back" on his situation without fully knowing the particulars about the relationship and made an assumption based on the facts you knew to be true, perhaps they were not. In the case that they were not it is very probable you made a mistake. As for your concern about this type of thinking, my suggestion is to relax. That is what is so amazing about the human mind, it has the ability to learn from its mistakes, this higher level of thinking allows us to be slightly more lax about the patterns in which we react to the world around us. There is truly no reason to be ashamed of this way of thinking, everyone views the world from a diffrent perspective, if this is yours, follow it and learn from it. Just be wary, If you begin to believe you are superior past your age you could be in for a shocking awakening later in life. Dont sweat it Flip, your in your early 20's, you have a long life ahead of you and a long time to make mistakes before they truly matter.

Assumptions are not something that I make as a spur of the moment type of thing. Though my friend was a bit blind during his relationship (as most people are), simple acts spoke volumes about the degree of the relationship between them. It was rather comical to view it from "afar", almost like how it is amusing to watch a person stumble around blindfolded. Yet, just as it is funny to watch that blindfolded man slam into random objects, it's also a tad bit sad...

Believing I am superior past my age is probably the most negative way of describing my "future" perspective, as well as the most accurate. I need to learn how to conrtol that arrogance, since apparently my friends find it a bit tiring.

And how is your friend doing now? Now that he is in his third week? Is his relationship beginning to shape up? And tell your friends to go screw themselves, your a badass b***h flip, dont change yourself for others.

[Dino]

Flip of Darkstar

As far as I can tell, getting shot by a paintball gun is not exactly a testimony to one's genius.
Perhaps when you get really old, like really, really old, when your abs are nothing but a sack of wrinkles, you'll look at your chest and think, "Damn, that was pretty stupid,"

But, to each their own. Scars are not exactly what I consider attractive, so whenever I play paintball, I always wear a nice, padded set of sweats (it may suck when it's hot, but I tend to play more during the winter, where an iced paint ball is not just going to leave a little scar).

Wait wait wait. (Not you Flip) You mean to tell me that you're a bright one for getting a hole in your chest? O.o

Murr.

And yes Flip. You are correct on this one. Just keep thinking like that and you may just avoid the darwin awards unlike some people. stare