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Happy Friday, everyone! Halloween craziness is brewing, but in the meantime we've still been working hard at crafting some top-notch EI updates. This week, we've got new evolutions from the Bad Moon, Lyndexer's Journal, and the Seracila Pendant.
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Read on for the full report, in which Timmy meets his first spiritual guide...
 Timmy: Well hello again, ever'body! I guess I'm doin' another EI Report from the road, on account of my big spiritual journey and all... I ran into some good luck, though: while I was walkin' down the road, I happened to pass under a bridge, and I found some sorta great spiritual leader! You can tell by his beard!
Old Pete: Change, mister?
Timmy: That's exactly what I'm hopin' for! I need to find a way to sort out my life in a big way, and I'm hopin' you can impart some kinda guru wisdom on me.
Old Pete: Found a samwich on the bus.
Timmy: We'll let this wise holy man tell us a little more about his monk-like ways in a minute, but I s'pose we better sort out this week's items first, huh?
Old Pete: Rain's a-comin'.
Timmy: Isn't it neato how he talks in parables? Anyway, here's a pretty excitin' thing for ya: the Seracila Pendant is really gettin' off to a huge start this week with a buncha great stuff: a staff, a tunic and a headband, all in real pretty reds and golds.
Old Pete: Hey mister. I'll swap you this bike wheel for a ferghprm... *cough*
Timmy: I guess I'm not quite wise enough to decipher this holy man's mumbling right now, but it sure sounded wise! Next up, the Bad Moon is risin' again with more scary, wolfish business! Kinda wish the Doc was here to help me from gettin' creeped out over this, but I guess I can take some comfort in knowin' that this wise old spiritual dude can protect me with his holy magic.
Old Pete: Drank a whole paint yesserday. A whole paint.
Timmy: Some kinda... communion, I guess. Anywho, last up we got this neat new evolution from Lyndexer's Journal that continues to chronicle the horrors of war with some real movin' poses... this is such a complicated subject that maybe we should let the holy man have a word about the nature of warfarin' and man's inhumanities and whatnot.
Old Pete: Y'see, mister, sometimes... people make a war. Business.
Timmy: That's real deeply profound, in a way. Well, folks, that's all the items we got this week-- don't forget to vote in our little poll and let us know which ones you like the best! If you care to stick around for another minute, I think I'm gonna attempt to have a little spiritual dialogue with this holy man to see what wisdom he can lay down. So, wise spiritual beard guy, what is the meaning of life?
Old Pete: Life... yeah, buddy, life is a stone-cold, uh. Sometimes you just look up at the stars and, uh, you drank a whole buncha paint, and... then you wake up and yer foot turned black.
Timmy: Yeah! It's like some kinda riddle! What do you think is the meanin' of my life, wise holy guy?
Old Pete: You gotta... mister, you gotta get out there and find a sandwich. On the bus. You gotta find your sandwich on the bus. I like you. You got a real... honest face. The police come by here, they're invisible, and one of 'em tells me I got a thing in my teeth so's the government hears my radio waves and they knows when I pee. You gotta find a sandwich because, uh.
Timmy: The bus! That's a real good idea, holy man. All this time I been walkin' around like a sucker, wearin' out my ol' dogs, when I coulda just hopped on a bus and found a nice sandwich and continued my spiritual quest real easily! Thanks, holy man!
Old Pete: Got paint, mister? Mighty thirsty for a sip of the ol' paint.
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