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Kiri-Paz
[~Ramble.Corset~]
okay so has anyone got anything to say other than the format, or are people gonna make this into another R2L vs L2R discussion thread >_>;;


omg thx for that!! 3nodding
you're welcome, good luck with the critique!


thank you!!! =D
Sakura Ao Bell's avatar

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i like the story alot. From what i have read so far it is really interesting.
Ninja_SakuraBell
i like the story alot. From what i have read so far it is really interesting.


Awwwww thank you so much!! whee *keeps working* C=
You might want to stop tracing too.
Tenko72's avatar

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I like the idea of people getting turned into scarecrows. I haven't read many stories like that. I haven't read many set in Rome either, which is also nice.

The pacing could be way better. I think the parts about his parents could've been saved for a later flashback to make it seem climactic. It's anticlimactic to have it right in the beginning like that.

On page 7, I think you meant from "dusk til dawn". "Twilight" means both dusk and dawn, so saying from twilight to dawn can be confusing, because it can mean only at dawn or dusk and dawn or dusk/dawn and dawn.
Tenko72
I like the idea of people getting turned into scarecrows. I haven't read many stories like that. I haven't read many set in Rome either, which is also nice.

The pacing could be way better. I think the parts about his parents could've been saved for a later flashback to make it seem climactic. It's anticlimactic to have it right in the beginning like that.

On page 7, I think you meant from "dusk til dawn". "Twilight" means both dusk and dawn, so saying from twilight to dawn can be confusing, because it can mean only at dawn or dusk and dawn or dusk/dawn and dawn.


oooh thank you much for reading it 3nodding im gonna change that word right away C= since my english isnt that good i really apreciated the point C=, and yea i shouldnt put the his past on the beggining sweatdrop but his past isnt really gonna be important on the story razz
curious. : ) quite frankly i think the idea of ppl turning into scarecrows is brilliant!.(seriously man, GREAT idea!!) i like this. we all have things that we need to work on n figure out as artists n comic-creators, and alot of these things sort themselves out with time(i think); while we practice, work n get new influences., i have no problem reading from right to left even though it might not serve any real purpose, neither do i think the baloons are in any way disturbing- so far!(i can imagine the problem they might cause when having to fill them up with more conversation/text). i do however feel that you'll figure these things out as you go, find a way that works for you n your way of telling a story.

i think it will be really interesting to see how your story will unfold. good work! : )
drend
curious. : ) quite frankly i think the idea of ppl turning into scarecrows is brilliant!.(seriously man, GREAT idea!!) i like this. we all have things that we need to work on n figure out as artists n comic-creators, and alot of these things sort themselves out with time(i think); while we practice, work n get new influences., i have no problem reading from right to left even though it might not serve any real purpose, neither do i think the baloons are in any way disturbing- so far!(i can imagine the problem they might cause when having to fill them up with more conversation/text). i do however feel that you'll figure these things out as you go, find a way that works for you n your way of telling a story.

i think it will be really interesting to see how your story will unfold. good work! : )


oohh whee thx so much for those words 4laugh i will do my best and work hard really thanks a lot!! = w =
Little Dead Soldier's avatar

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Wow, everyone is being a complete d**k to you :/
Little Dead Soldier
Wow, everyone is being a complete d**k to you :/


hehe yeah some of them -.- but i really apreciate the critics that helps me to get better those make me work harder.. C= the others... well some of them are pointless for my point of view hehe whee

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