virginity: your thoughts

[Vosi]

AyameRose

Vagabond Vendor

AyameRose

Vagabond Vendor

AyameRose

She's not drawing a name from a hat, obviously there is some sort of matchmaking process involved. Probably her parents will meet with his parents, and it's never a coin toss, well, lets get this guy, decision. Arranging a marriage is a long, complicated process. Assuming she's going to end up with a b*****d is stupid. Someone has to arrange it, and they probably have the best interests of the families involved in mind.

You are aware what is best for the families may not be best for the individuals involved in the marriage at all, right?

People have been doing it for centuries, and the species seems to have survived this far. In India its still a huge cultural feature. Your parents aren't going to set you up with someone you hate or could never get along with. It works when the people involved know what they're doing. Usually it takes years of interviews, background checks, evaluation. And they don't have to be the love of your life. You just have to get along respectfully and raise a healthy family.

I don't think you understand that it used to be a business manuveur. Selling women for part of a company, or putting your son with some deformed fat ugly b***h so that two companies could merge, wasn't unheard of.

Your happiness back then, and now, comes second, not first.

It was and still is a a business manuveur in some situations. The silk producer's son marries the fabric weaver's daughter. But it was also about the survival and the health of the group as a whole. Its a very western idea that the individual is more important than the group as a whole. In alot of these situations, the wife or husband would move into the same living space as their inlaws, so it became even more important for that person to be someone who fit comfortably into the group. I'm just saying, if it works and it makes them happy, whatever.

K.

[Instructor12345]

botticellis venus

BombInABox

botticellis venus

BombInABox

I personally support you in your decison to be a virgin. I believe it takes true willpower to stay away from something that is so glamorized in this modern day. It is good and healthy, and you don't have to worry about STD's blaugh

haha thank you.

So, if I read this correctly, you have an arranged marriage? Hmm... well a truly healthy and fulfilling marriage is based on patience, understanding, and ultimately, love. Do you love the man you are supposed to marry?

and communication.

i dont know who i am getting married to yet. i will probably wait a few more years.

True, communication is also key.

Sources: I have two happily married parents. smile

[AyameRose]

xd I'm off to bed, folks. Long drive tomorrow. Night!

[botticellis venus]

Vagabond Vendor

botticellis venus

Vagabond Vendor

AyameRose

Vagabond Vendor

AyameRose

She's not drawing a name from a hat, obviously there is some sort of matchmaking process involved. Probably her parents will meet with his parents, and it's never a coin toss, well, lets get this guy, decision. Arranging a marriage is a long, complicated process. Assuming she's going to end up with a b*****d is stupid. Someone has to arrange it, and they probably have the best interests of the families involved in mind.

You are aware what is best for the families may not be best for the individuals involved in the marriage at all, right?

People have been doing it for centuries, and the species seems to have survived this far. In India its still a huge cultural feature. Your parents aren't going to set you up with someone you hate or could never get along with. It works when the people involved know what they're doing. Usually it takes years of interviews, background checks, evaluation. And they don't have to be the love of your life. You just have to get along respectfully and raise a healthy family.

I don't think you understand that it used to be a business manuveur. Selling women for part of a company, or putting your son with some deformed fat ugly b***h so that two companies could merge, wasn't unheard of.

Your happiness back then, and now, comes second, not first.

actually, it was more land and livestock back in the day
and that kind of arranged marriage does still go on, but it has become alot more modern. happiness is considered important now. you have the wrong timeline.

Nah, I have the right timeline, but economically as a construct happiness still comes second. I am aware it's much more modern and has been updated to include the actual recipients, but there are times when it doesn't matter even today, especially in richer families.

Oh, and yes, it was cows. People like land and cows.

indeed, there are differnt situations. but its important to not group all arranged marriage into one group, like many people do.

[The Evil Rabbit]

For me, virginity in itself isn't very important. Most people end up having sex at some point in their lives either sooner or later. I don't think the number of partners / times someone has had sex in the past are as important as how responsible they are when they do engage in sexual activities. Are they clean? Do they use contraceptives properly? Etc.

As for myself, I'm 22 and I haven't had sex yet. Simply, I've never been in a relationship. I rarely feel attracted to people. I'm not going to screw some guy I'm not interested in simply for the sake of screwing. I'm not going to wait until marriage, as I think that marriage is not needed in order to have a stable, loving relationship with someone. Children? No thanks. Not in my uterus. I have no desire to become a mother.

[botticellis venus]

AyameRose

xd I'm off to bed, folks. Long drive tomorrow. Night!

good night!

[Deshtaki]

let me say this first. I am happy that you are happy with these arrangements. ^^ but for my being a virgin isn't a bad thing but nor is it a good thing. It's between the two. Really it's mostly about someones life style. i've been surrounded by sex and such from an early age so to me sex is sex. i think it is the emotions behind the sex that create something of it. if your just doing it for the pleasure then fine or if you are saving it for someone whether because you're waiting for someone you love or because it is arranged more power to you. With stuff now a days, all the sex on t.v., it changes how people view it also. but for me personally, sex is sex. i'm still a virgin, by choice, but i'm also not saving myself for anyone special. when the time is right then i'll have it.

[Vosi]

botticellis venus

Vagabond Vendor

botticellis venus

Vagabond Vendor

AyameRose

People have been doing it for centuries, and the species seems to have survived this far. In India its still a huge cultural feature. Your parents aren't going to set you up with someone you hate or could never get along with. It works when the people involved know what they're doing. Usually it takes years of interviews, background checks, evaluation. And they don't have to be the love of your life. You just have to get along respectfully and raise a healthy family.

I don't think you understand that it used to be a business manuveur. Selling women for part of a company, or putting your son with some deformed fat ugly b***h so that two companies could merge, wasn't unheard of.

Your happiness back then, and now, comes second, not first.

actually, it was more land and livestock back in the day
and that kind of arranged marriage does still go on, but it has become alot more modern. happiness is considered important now. you have the wrong timeline.

Nah, I have the right timeline, but economically as a construct happiness still comes second. I am aware it's much more modern and has been updated to include the actual recipients, but there are times when it doesn't matter even today, especially in richer families.

Oh, and yes, it was cows. People like land and cows.

indeed, there are differnt situations. but its important to not group all arranged marriage into one group, like many people do.

I agree. I'll be more cautious, as it's your thread.

[botticellis venus]

Deshtaki

let me say this first. I am happy that you are happy with these arrangements. ^^ but for my being a virgin isn't a bad thing but nor is it a good thing. It's between the two. Really it's mostly about someones life style. i've been surrounded by sex and such from an early age so to me sex is sex. i think it is the emotions behind the sex that create something of it. if your just doing it for the pleasure then fine or if you are saving it for someone whether because you're waiting for someone you love or because it is arranged more power to you. With stuff now a days, all the sex on t.v., it changes how people view it also. but for me personally, sex is sex. i'm still a virgin, by choice, but i'm also not saving myself for anyone special. when the time is right then i'll have it.

well, i hope that whoever you choose makes you really happy for a long time.

[botticellis venus]

Vagabond Vendor

botticellis venus

Vagabond Vendor

botticellis venus

Vagabond Vendor

AyameRose

People have been doing it for centuries, and the species seems to have survived this far. In India its still a huge cultural feature. Your parents aren't going to set you up with someone you hate or could never get along with. It works when the people involved know what they're doing. Usually it takes years of interviews, background checks, evaluation. And they don't have to be the love of your life. You just have to get along respectfully and raise a healthy family.

I don't think you understand that it used to be a business manuveur. Selling women for part of a company, or putting your son with some deformed fat ugly b***h so that two companies could merge, wasn't unheard of.

Your happiness back then, and now, comes second, not first.

actually, it was more land and livestock back in the day
and that kind of arranged marriage does still go on, but it has become alot more modern. happiness is considered important now. you have the wrong timeline.

Nah, I have the right timeline, but economically as a construct happiness still comes second. I am aware it's much more modern and has been updated to include the actual recipients, but there are times when it doesn't matter even today, especially in richer families.

Oh, and yes, it was cows. People like land and cows.

indeed, there are differnt situations. but its important to not group all arranged marriage into one group, like many people do.

I agree. I'll be more cautious, as it's your thread.

haha, i feel like an a**.

[phantomkitsune]

Virginity is prized too highly. Yes, your first time should be special, but in an age of birth control, disease tests, and paternity tests, there's no reason to remain a virgin until marriage.

[Instructor12345]

phantomkitsune

Virginity is prized too highly. Yes, your first time should be special, but in an age of birth control, disease tests, and paternity tests, there's no reason to remain a virgin until marriage.

What if it is for religious beliefs? Such as the average Christian girl wanting to stay "pure" until she gets married? Even if there is birth control, there is no pill to get your virginity back.

[Breuger]

There may not be a pill, but there is an operation to get your hymen back. Unless we are talking about virginity in a psychological sense, which is hard to do...

[phantomkitsune]

BombInABox

phantomkitsune

Virginity is prized too highly. Yes, your first time should be special, but in an age of birth control, disease tests, and paternity tests, there's no reason to remain a virgin until marriage.

What if it is for religious beliefs? Such as the average Christian girl wanting to stay "pure" until she gets married? Even if there is birth control, there is no pill to get your virginity back.

Have you heard of saddlebacking? Very few people stay 'pure' because of religion. And even that religious doctrine is based on fear of disease and on wanting to be able to establish paternity. And it's a fairly new phenomenon. In the seventeenth and eighteenth century in the US, premarital sex and even pregnancy was completely acceptable, as long as the father, or someone, married the mother.

[The Evil Rabbit]

BombInABox

phantomkitsune

Virginity is prized too highly. Yes, your first time should be special, but in an age of birth control, disease tests, and paternity tests, there's no reason to remain a virgin until marriage.

What if it is for religious beliefs? Such as the average Christian girl wanting to stay "pure" until she gets married? Even if there is birth control, there is no pill to get your virginity back.

No, but I've heard of cosmetic surgeries where hymens were restored. If she has the money, she can make her whoo-ha like new again.