Top Reasons Why You’ll Get Your a** Kicked in the WF

[Tard Is Whadt]

Weathertop

Gale the Awesome

Reason 23 - you thought this was cool.

This reason needs no description.

Oh god. Oh god. MY EYES!

disgusting.

[Firlodge]

Reason 24 - Bump-o-mania


We move slowly. Don't bump your thread unless it falls off the first page. Not only is it annoying, but if it's a question thread, it makes it look like you already have help, so we can ignore your thread.

[Tard Is Whadt]

Reason 25 - GODMODDING

Okay, so say you're walking along and suddenly you see a big evil creature! What do you do? Why, you use your newly developed superpower of course!

Why does everyone have a superpower that makes them invincible? It's not cool. It's not smart. It doesn't lead to interesting plot twists. In my world, if someone were to suddenly become invincible, they would end up killing all their friends and ruling the world (hey, new story idea...)

Seriously, though. Nobody's perfect. Not even in your dreamworld. If you want to give your character a superpower, first: make sure it's not godmodding (i.e. becoming more powerful than a god) and second: make sure there are some FLAWS (key word there) with the power. For all you tv nerds (myself included) who watch Heroes: even the characters in that story aren't invincible! They have flaws! (well, Claire, you could call invincible, but she still has flaws)

which leads into Reason 26 - The QUEST

the only good book that had a quest in it, in my opinion, was the first book in the Wind on Fire trilogy. In that book, the main characters going on the quest did not know what was going on, they were not prepared, and the only reason they actually did the quest in the first place was because they were little children without adult supervision (tsk tsk) and they were scared.

please, no more questing. I for one am sick and tired of it. *wails*

[Lalet]

Weathertop

Gale the Awesome

Reason 23 - you thought this was cool.

This reason needs no description.

Oh god. Oh god. MY EYES!

You've killed me at such a young age. u_u

This reminds me of another point that, though mentioned constantly, deserves a place here...

Reason 27 - It's not writing for yourself if you shove it in other people's faces

"well Im jus writing 4 miself so i dont rally care wut u think" People use this excuse all the time to justify themselves, and it's starting to make me sick. If you were really only writing for yourself, with no regard to how the reader feels, the writing would have never seen the light of day. Those are the things we keep under lock and key, pushed far beneath our beds. But the fact is, you're looking for someone to comment on it, to say you did a good job, and for that to really mean anything at all, it actually has to be true. So stop spewing excuses and start taking responsibility for your work. No one forced you to sit down and write a giant mass of every cliche and worn out catchphrase known to mankind. By the gods, that would be the second worst punishment of all.

[Firlodge]

Lalet

Weathertop

Gale the Awesome

Reason 23 - you thought this was cool.

This reason needs no description.

Oh god. Oh god. MY EYES!

You've killed me at such a young age. u_u

This reminds me of another point that, though mentioned constantly, deserves a place here...

Reason 27 - It's not writing for yourself if you shove it in other people's faces

"well Im jus writing 4 miself so i dont rally care wut u think" People use this excuse all the time to justify themselves, and it's starting to make me sick. If you were really only writing for yourself, with no regard to how the reader feels, the writing would have never seen the light of day. Those are the things we keep under lock and key, pushed far beneath our beds. But the fact is, you're looking for someone to comment on it, to say you did a good job, and for that to really mean anything at all, it actually has to be true. So stop spewing excuses and start taking responsibility for your work. No one forced you to sit down and write a giant mass of every cliche and worn out catchphrase known to mankind. By the gods, that would be the second worst punishment of all.

Or in my case, crappy writing is shoved FIRMLY in my bleh folder.

[raven_1201]

I love this thread.

[no cash for pixels]

There should be one about arguing with me.

[TigerEyeJewel]

Pride Edward Elric

I thought of another.

Reason 6: Repeat threads

Why must there be a hundred threads on 'What is a Sue?' or 'Pen vs computer' or 'I need a title for my book.'? The forum moves slowly, and threads become buried over time. Is it that hard to look on the past two or three pages to see if a thread has been already made? It's only one click, but no people have to create more threads and use more space on the servers. Also, there is the stickies for a reason. They list the types of threads that have been done to death and then some. Read them. It does wonders.

And if you are too lazy to do that, on the main forums page there is a search box. It is easy to use and all you have to do is type in "sue" or "Mary-Sue" and voila, you get your answer without having to make your own thread.

[Firlodge]

Reason 28 - -ist -phobic syndrome

If someone says your writing needs work, chances are they AREN'T racist, sexist, homophobic pigs. They're probably judging via text. Despite what your avatar looks like. And we can't tell how much melanin your skin has, what your sexual preferences are, what sex you are, THROUGH A COMPUTER SCREEN. Avatars can lie.

[Alienor Kaze]

Reason 29 - Know your setting
I know a lot of this stuff occurs in fanfictions, but I've seen it happen in original stories. Needless to say, fanfictions are a form of writing, so I suppose this does fit into long list of reasons why someone would get their a** kicked in the WF. Nothing is more annoying than reading blatant CRAP that has absolutely nothing to do with the setting. If the story is set in the author's own little universe, it's slightly tolerable, but most of the stories I've been reading have a lot of influence from Asian culture set back in the 1500s or 1300s. That being the case, the writer ought to be more realistic with the time setting.

Rant:
I have had countless moments where I'd read a story set in Feudal Japan or somewhere in Asia during the 1500s and I'll see a European citadel pop in with MARBLE pillars and stairwells, silk tapestries, and (OMFG) four-poster BEDS! I'm sorry, but places like Japan and Korea did NOT have four poster beds during the 1500s (maybe Korea did in the 1300s due to the heavier influence from China at the time)! And most buildings in Japan were built from WOOD and had sliding Shoji screens, not big heavy oak doors. Japanese people wore traditional full-suited KIMONOS. Under NO circumstances have they EVER worn great poofy ball gowns with sparkling Tiaras. That stuff didn't even exist until the western influx that occurred sometime during the mid 1800s.

[confused_author]

kaze no sakura

Reason 28 - Know your setting
I know a lot of this stuff occurs in fanfictions, but I've seen it happen in original stories. Needless to say, fanfictions are a form of writing, so I suppose this does fit into long list of reasons why someone would get their a** kicked in the WF. Nothing is more annoying than reading blatant CRAP that has absolutely nothing to do with the setting. If the story is set in the author's own little universe, it's slightly tolerable, but most of the stories I've been reading have a lot of influence from Asian culture set back in the 1500s or 1300s. That being the case, the writer ought to be more realistic with the time setting.

Rant:
I have had countless moments where I'd read a story set in Feudal Japan or somewhere in Asia during the 1500s and I'll see a European citadel pop in with MARBLE pillars and stairwells, silk tapestries, and (OMFG) four-poster BEDS! I'm sorry, but places like Japan and Korea did NOT have four poster beds during the 1500s (maybe Korea did in the 1300s due to the heavier influence from China at the time)! And most buildings in Japan were built from WOOD and had sliding Shoji screens, not big heavy oak doors. Japanese people wore traditional full-suited KIMONOS. Under NO circumstances have they EVER worn great poofy ball gowns with sparkling Tiaras. That stuff didn't even exist until the western influx that occurred sometime during the mid 1800s.

It seems that a lot of writers on the Internet are Westerners that are obsessed with all things Japanese.

Know nothing bout Japan? Never been to Japan? Don't even know anyone that knows remotely anything about Japan? Then write a story set in Japan!

Seriously though, that bugs me too. burning_eyes

Just for clarification, I also know nothing about Japan. I haven't written a story with Japan as my setting. ...Yet. rofl

[Aylen]

Wow, four pages. o.O XD

While all four pages are full of good advice, some of it deals with more characterization and plotting and general venting about amateur mistakes than actually surviving in the WF, so those won't make it to the front page. I'd still recommend newbies reading through it all, though. biggrin

[confused_author]

Aylen

Wow, four pages. o.O XD

While all four pages are full of good advice, some of it deals with more characterization and plotting and general venting about amateur mistakes than actually surviving in the WF, so those won't make it to the front page. I'd still recommend newbies reading through it all, though. biggrin

Ditto. 3nodding

Unfortunately, most newbies probably won't even bother to look before breaking one or more of these rules.

[Aylen]

fallingstartheauthoress

Aylen

Wow, four pages. o.O XD

While all four pages are full of good advice, some of it deals with more characterization and plotting and general venting about amateur mistakes than actually surviving in the WF, so those won't make it to the front page. I'd still recommend newbies reading through it all, though. biggrin

Ditto. 3nodding

Unfortunately, most newbies probably won't even bother to look before breaking one or more of these rules.

This is how the scenario in my head goes:
Newbie: ninja *breaks a rule*
WF: GARAAAAAAAGH!!!! evil
Newbie: MEEEEEP! *is pwnt*

-later-
Newbie: Why does everyone hate me? crying Wait, there's a thread about this! *reads* Now I is educated! *happy unicorns and butterflies*

My sanity is...questionable. XD

[Special Agent Nishin]

V for Venereal Disease

There should be one about arguing with me.

The next number - Arguing with V! (I can't count today.) Arguing with V for Venereal Disease is [most often, which is about 97%] an automatic loss on your part, especially noobs. Don't even try, noobs. Think of it like arguing with a wall. You look stupid doing it, and you're even more insane to even try in the first place. The same applies to Veive.

I love this thread, too.