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[Pardon our dust. Remodeling first page. smile ]

Yeah, so is there some newbie influx of the Writer’s forum today or something? Maybe I just haven’t noticed them recently until today, but that’s beside the point. The point is, I felt like all I did in here today was report posts/threads for spam, trolling, and misplaced topics, and I swear three popped up every sixty seconds.

The moderators will look at their little report box, or wherever they see the reports and go “Aw hell, it’s that Aylen kid reporting stuff again.” They’re probably sick of seeing my username.

So, I figure if I make a guide on how to provoke WF regulars to go after you with iron pipes, new peoples will get the idea (I can dream, can’t I?) and have a wonderful journey through our beloved forum :smileyface: not get mauled on their first tentative venture.

There’s no way I can cover all of them in one sitting, so you guys are gonna have to help me out. wink Discuss them, comment them, suggest new ones, argue, rant, whatever. Questions? Go ahead and post them.

Now here they are.

Reason One! - i tipe leik dis
Okay kid, read this: Writer’s forum. Now say it with me slowly, Writer’s forum. What the hell are you doing here if you can’t write?

i kin rite wat i want u nazi

Alright, fine, whatever. But it’s your first impression you’re throwing down the shithole. If you want us to take you seriously, for the love of sweet Jesus, at least show us you can capitalize and use punctuation. There’s nothing that burns our eyes more than a wall of text littered with typos, missing punctuation, and obvious lack of effort in your post. When you’re here, you gotta speak our lingo, get it? Got it? Good.

Reason Two! - Can you rate my story/poem?
No. Why? Two words: wrong forum. We have two beautiful subforums for those, aptly called the Original Poetry/Lyrics and the Original Stories/Prose subforums. You’ll find them at the top of the page. Click them. They’re lonely.

Mini-rant
I never got why the hell someone would want their story “rated”. What does that even mean? G-rated? PG? PG-13? Or do you actually want us to reduce your story, the one you’ve spent hours on, to a measly number? I mean, come on, numbers mean nothing. You cannot take something as fluid and subjective as writing and cram it into a numbered scale! Plus, having a number does not help you improve your writing whatsoever. You improve writing by taking constructive critique, and if you’re not here to improve you’re just looking for attention or an ego stroke. We don’t give those out here, so if you’re one of those, begone and go somewhere else.

Reason Three! - fine, ur so mean
I wonder why I’ve never seen that properly typed out? Well, anyway, consider this phrase instant death in this forum. I am not kidding. I don’t care if you’re just joking when you say this. This is one of the single most insulting things you can say to a person who’s just helped you. Show some gratitude, dammit! A complete stranger has just spent their time thinking over your problem, coming up with something to help you.

Think about it. You help someone you don’t know very well solve a really difficult math problem and when you guys are finally done, all that person says is “Fine, you’re so mean.” I, personally, would sucker punch the guy in the frigging face. Maybe twice. So think about what you are saying before you post.

Now, if a guy goes around saying your stuff sucks without providing any sort of reason at all, go ahead and kick his a**.


Mini-rant
The thing is, on the internet, it’s difficult to figure what the person on the other side of the computer means when all you have to go on is half a line of text. He or she could mean it with good humor or s/he might be completely serious. Do us a favor and make it clear what you mean with a smiley face or something. But remember to be polite to the people who are helping you, gawd.

And more about accepting/giving critique...
Nematri
All this talk of flamers and people who won't take criticism has made me think:

Reason number YOU SUCK! You think ad-hominem arguments/criticisms are the way to get people to listen to you, treat you with respect, or whatever.

Seriously, kids...let's make this forum a civilised forum...if you don't like the point somebody has made, criticise the POINT, not the person.

Example 1: Suppose you posted a story, and somebody gave a suggestion for it that you really weren't happy with.

Correct answer: "Thanks for the input, but I really don't think that suggestion would work very well in my story/I'm personally not keen on the idea of [whatever] in my story so I probably won't use it, but thanks for taking the time."
Gonna-get-your-a**-kicked answer: "SCREW YOU! YOU SUCK! YOU'RE AN IDIOT FOR SUGGESTING THAT! YOU JUST WANT MY WORK TO SUCKKKKKKK!"

And let's not forget that sometimes it's the critics who need an a**-kicking, not the people who ask for critique, which leads me to:

Example 2: Somebody has posted a really bad piece of tripe and asked you to critique it.

Correct answer: "Erm...I don't think that's very good, personally/have you ever thought of...?/maybe you should rewrite this/I don't think this is very original, have you tried...?"
Gonna-get-your-a**-kicked answer: "HAHAHAHAHA! You fail at life! Go home and kill yourself, you loser!"


And if you still need help understanding, this thread does a great job of explaining a few guidelines you should follow when critiquing or accepting critique.

Reason Four! - OMG, I love [insert author here]!
Again, two words: wrong forum. Author/book discussion goes in the Entertainment Forum, in the book discussion subforum. Do not post your favorite book here!

Mini-rant
You know about closet gays? Well, in the Writer’s forum, we have closet Christopher Paolini, Stephanie Meyer, and general vampire fans. The correct answer to “Don’t you love their books?” is a clear and definite no, whether you mean it or not. The majority of the WF hates them with a passion and are absolutely sick of people coming around just to gush about them. In fact, if you’re coming here to gush, you’re in the wrong forum anyway. Hence the a**-kicking. Go to the Entertainment forum.

Reason Five! - Give me ideas!
No. Find your own ideas, moocher. Why? Read on, little grasshopper.

Reinna Astarel

Now, people commonly have questions or problems about their writing, and go to other people for answers. That's cool. But what I don't get- and can't stand-, are the people going "Tell me what my story should be about!!" or "Give me characters/ideas to write about!!" WTF? If people have ideas for stories, they'd be USING them, not doling them out to imagination-impaired people who somehow lack any ideas to write about and have to resort to bumming them off others.


kaze no sakura
Don't expect people to write ANY of your stories for you. Writing displays your heart and soul and brings out the juices in your opinion. In no way should you expect someone to come up with your story's plot, setting, and characters. You may ask for suggestions, but do not expect people who sit around and do everything for you. If this does happen, then said person has every right to take that story away and claim it as their own. Don't cry and whine if something like this happens.


Reason Six! - I’m writing an anime/manga story!
Okay, this one’s a little hard to explain, so bear with me. Anime or manga is not a genre of writing. They are genres for TV shows and comics, not novels or actual writing.
If the final product is going to be words, it is not manga or anime. Deal with it.

But you still have to plan a script!

Yes, it involves writing, but in the end, it’s a medium of pictures, so you’re probably better off in the Art Discussion, Comic Creators subforum. Comic Creators can help you characterize characters through visual pictures, which is the point of a comic or manga. We're about crafting words here, and it may not translate as well as you might think.

However, we're perfectly willing to help you out with plot or script, or characterization here. Personally, I still think you'd get better help in Comic Creators. Just don't call your work an "anime story" or a "manga story" or risk being laughed to Bermuda.

Maybe a few quotes will help make things clearer.
Starbuck Xemnas
If you want to get critic or help on a story you are writing, just say "I came up with this idea for a manga storyline I'm working on. Here is the script." Saying "this is my anime story lol!!!" is going to make people laugh at you and pick you to hell for being a moron.


Mini-rant
Another thing to keep in mind, anime can get away with a lot more randomness and underdeveloped clichés than actual writing can. If you are imagining your story as anime and writing it out in that mindset, it will most likely only turn out like a bad fanfiction. This is just from my own experience and opinion, but it’s a good thing to keep in mind.

As I've said, this is the hardest to pin down. There's even a whole discussion about it starting on page ten if you want to read up on it. (though it was mostly a few n00bs trying to substitute insults for a solid argument, which, by the way, makes you look like an a**. This thread is devoted to a** kicking, so I suggest you do not follow their examples when you present your views.)

Other reasons I'm working on
Write my essay for me!
Help me with my homework!
I'm going to set my story in Japan!
BuMp!
Tell me if my idea/character/plot is okay
This is such a sweet poem!
That's good (as a comment on someone else's idea)
Looking for RP!



Now, there are a lot of people who know what they're talking about here, and most everything in this thread has a good strong, valid point. I'm going to try put the big ones in the first post so new people won't be overwhelmed by the other, more detailed ones. I still suggest looking through this thread if you're new, but if you're short on time, you should be okay with just the first post. smile
Reason four! - Talking about books--READ THE DAMN STICKIES BEFORE POSTING! The little subtitle thing under the Writer's Forum link is a little misleading. It basically says, "Discuss all things literary." If you read the stickies, you'd (you referring to the misplaced Gaian) know that there is a separate Book subforum in the Entertainment Forum. Why can't you read the sticky before posting? If you did, you wouldn't get some replies that may be considered flames. SO READ THE STICKIES. And don't come to us with Eragon or Twilight talk. Generally, the frequenters (that's not a word, I think) of the WF hate Paolini and Meyer.

[EDIT] It turns out that threads about Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight series and Harry Potter are all repeat threads in the Book fourm and go to the Recycling Bin.
Aylen
Or do you actually want us to reduce your story, the one you’ve spent hours on, to a measly number? I mean, come on, numbers mean nothing.

No kidding! When I post stories in the Prose subforum, I don't want people to give me 3/10 or 7/10 or 80/100 (not that I've even had that much of a response, but that's another thread wink ). That doesn't help me in the least. It's about as useful as, "You suck!" I want people to look at my stories and tell me what they like and don't like. I want to know what people think I can do to make my writing better.

Great post!
[Nishin
Reason four! - Talking about books--READ THE DAMN STICKIES BEFORE POSTING! The little subtitle thing under the Writer's Forum link is a little misleading. It basically says, "Discuss all things literary." If you read the stickies, you'd (you referring to the misplaced Gaian) know that there is a separate Book subforum in the Entertainment Forum. Why can't you read the sticky before posting? If you did, you wouldn't get some replies that may be considered flames. SO READ THE STICKIES. And don't come to us with Eragon or Twilight talk. Generally, the frequenters (that's not a word, I think) of the WF hate Paolini and Meyer.


Yeah, forgot that one. ^_^

Ryujin Dragonsoul
Aylen
Or do you actually want us to reduce your story, the one you’ve spent hours on, to a measly number? I mean, come on, numbers mean nothing.

No kidding! When I post stories in the Prose subforum, I don't want people to give me 3/10 or 7/10 or 80/100 (not that I've even had that much of a response, but that's another thread wink ). That doesn't help me in the least. It's about as useful as, "You suck!" I want people to look at my stories and tell me what they like and don't like. I want to know what people think I can do to make my writing better.

Great post!


I knew I wasn't the only one, I knew it! XD I don't anyone's ever mentioned it before, so I wasn't sure.

And thanks. I had to make some sort of rant. It's practically like a rite of passage here.
Encouraging bad behavior and rule breaking

Sometimes when someone leaves a concrit, another reviewer tells the writer to ignore said concrit, because there isn't anything nice about it. As writers, we want to learn and grow. That means we have to learn where we fall short and improve upon that area. If we don't know, we won't improve. Sadly, some people don't think this way. Encouraging bad habits also inflates a bad writer's ego into thinking that he/she doesn't need to improve his/her writing.

Another thing is breaking rules. They exist for a reason. In some threads, people have told off even mods who tell them they're breaking the rules. This isn't always the OP but a reviewer.
Reason 5: Asking for Ideas

Now, people commonly have questions or problems about their writing, and go to other people for answers. That's cool. But what I don't get- and can't stand-, are the people going "Tell me what my story should be about!!" or "Give me characters/ideas to write about!!" WTF? If people have ideas for stories, they'd be USING them, not doling them out to imagination-impaired people who somehow lack any ideas to write about and have to resort to bumming them off others.
Aylen
And thanks. I had to make some sort of rant. It's practically like a rite of passage here.

I guess I should get working on mine, then. wink
Reinna Astarel
Reason 5: Asking for Ideas

Now, people commonly have questions or problems about their writing, and go to other people for answers. That's cool. But what I don't get- and can't stand-, are the people going "Tell me what my story should be about!!" or "Give me characters/ideas to write about!!" WTF? If people have ideas for stories, they'd be USING them, not doling them out to imagination-impaired people who somehow lack any ideas to write about and have to resort to bumming them off others.
There are only so many times the same person can use the cake analogy when it comes to validating ideas.
I thought of another.

Reason 6: Repeat threads

Why must there be a hundred threads on 'What is a Sue?' or 'Pen vs computer' or 'I need a title for my book.'? The forum moves slowly, and threads become buried over time. Is it that hard to look on the past two or three pages to see if a thread has been already made? It's only one click, but no people have to create more threads and use more space on the servers. Also, there is the stickies for a reason. They list the types of threads that have been done to death and then some. Read them. It does wonders.
C e r u l e a n's avatar

Intellectual Mage

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[Nishin
Reason four! - Talking about books--READ THE DAMN STICKIES BEFORE POSTING! The little subtitle thing under the Writer's Forum link is a little misleading. It basically says, "Discuss all things literary." If you read the stickies, you'd (you referring to the misplaced Gaian) know that there is a separate Book subforum in the Entertainment Forum. Why can't you read the sticky before posting? If you did, you wouldn't get some replies that may be considered flames. SO READ THE STICKIES. And don't come to us with Eragon or Twilight talk. Generally, the frequenters (that's not a word, I think) of the WF hate Paolini and Meyer.


lol, I remember seeing those threads and cringing. Good point on the Eragon and Twilight. I was tempted to tell them most people on here don't like them... glad I wasn't the only one seeing new people though. I wish I had one but I can't think of one right now. Good thread.
[Nishin
Reinna Astarel
Reason 5: Asking for Ideas

Now, people commonly have questions or problems about their writing, and go to other people for answers. That's cool. But what I don't get- and can't stand-, are the people going "Tell me what my story should be about!!" or "Give me characters/ideas to write about!!" WTF? If people have ideas for stories, they'd be USING them, not doling them out to imagination-impaired people who somehow lack any ideas to write about and have to resort to bumming them off others.
There are only so many times the same person can use the cake analogy when it comes to validating ideas.

...? O.o
C e r u l e a n
[Nishin
Reason four! - Talking about books--READ THE DAMN STICKIES BEFORE POSTING! The little subtitle thing under the Writer's Forum link is a little misleading. It basically says, "Discuss all things literary." If you read the stickies, you'd (you referring to the misplaced Gaian) know that there is a separate Book subforum in the Entertainment Forum. Why can't you read the sticky before posting? If you did, you wouldn't get some replies that may be considered flames. SO READ THE STICKIES. And don't come to us with Eragon or Twilight talk. Generally, the frequenters (that's not a word, I think) of the WF hate Paolini and Meyer.


lol, I remember seeing those threads and cringing. Good point on the Eragon and Twilight. I was tempted to tell them most people on here don't like them... glad I wasn't the only one seeing new people though. I wish I had one but I can't think of one right now. Good thread.
That's too bad... You'll get one soon.

Reason Seven - Subforums are there for a reason, so use them! Okay, the "Post Reply" button is at the bottom of the Subforum box. How easy could the mods make the Subforum box? There's a little heading and a little subtitle thing under it. The subtitle briefly explains where a post goes. And in the subforum is a sticky that even further explains what belongs in the subforum. So what's wrong? Why can't you use the subforum properly? Do you want a chatspeak translation? Do you need bigger, brighter, bolder font to understand where posts go? The genreal WF is used for writing questions. The subforums are to show off your work. GAWD, LYKE, LEARN TO REED!!!111!!1!

Little linky!
Reason 8 - Don't expect people to write ANY of your stories for you.
Writing displays your heart and soul and brings out the juices in your opinion. In no way should you expect someone to come up with your story's plot, setting, and characters. You may ask for suggestions, but do not expect people who sit around and do everything for you. If this does happen, then said person has every right to take that story away and claim it as their own. Don't cry and whine if something like this happens.
Reason 9 - Calling your story "anime" or "manga" Here's my anime story! Here's my manga!

What the hell? "Anime" refers to Japanese animation and "Manga" refers to Japanese comics, and both can refer to the distinct Japanese drawing style.

Anime is NOT a theme or a genre. Science Fiction is a genre because it may contain stuff like advanced technology, futuristic societies, aliens, or interstellar travel. Anime, well, anime is a Japanese cartoon. Cartoons can be about ANYTHING.

And by calling your own story anime, you're basically making your story into flypaper for anime clichés, such as those annoying, princess-obsessed schoolgirls with all the roses flying all over, the nippleless men, the pseudo-Japan crap, and concepts taken from mainstream anime.

SERIOUSLY. Anime is a cartoon with a distinct drawing style and nothing more.
[~ Intricate Detail ~]
Reason 9 - Calling your story "anime" or "manga" Here's my anime story! Here's my manga!

What the hell? "Anime" refers to Japanese animation and "Manga" refers to Japanese comics, and both can refer to the distinct Japanese drawing style.

Anime is NOT a theme or a genre. Science Fiction is a genre because it may contain stuff like advanced technology, futuristic societies, aliens, or interstellar travel. Anime, well, anime is a Japanese cartoon. Cartoons can be about ANYTHING.

And by calling your own story anime, you're basically making your story into flypaper for anime clichés, such as those annoying, princess-obsessed schoolgirls with all the roses flying all over, the nippleless men, the pseudo-Japan crap, and concepts taken from mainstream anime.

SERIOUSLY. Anime is a cartoon with a distinct drawing style and nothing more.

That reminds me of people who post their manga/doushinji ideas in this forum. That stuff isn't even considered literature.

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