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iDate Rape C o o k i e's avatar

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Not to be crude or anything, but how many of you come off from Gaia feeling worse than you had before logging on to write in LI?

And, possibly, who is the worst person who's been handing out advice- because some of users are frequent on this specific thread?

It just seems like there is more crude replies and what not when a good amount of users are looking for advice and a place to vent.
fubenkunai's avatar

Sparkly Dabbler

First, technically this is not a Life Issue, so brace yourself for all that.

Second, I think sometimes people cry foul a little too fast. Some people have a very "tough love" delivery, but that doesn't mean they're not seeing things well and giving good advice. It just means they are blunt people. Maybe that's not ideal, but it's not cruel either. It's just straightforward. I would encourage people to do the old deep-breath-count-to-ten before disregarding a post, because sometimes, those blunt people? They do a better job than the light-touch, let's-please-everyone-but-the-hurt-person types.

Third, I know some people are just mean. If you read through a post and conclude it's cruelty and not tough love, well, ignore it! It's not really about you. When someone comes and kicks you when you're down, it's not your fault. It's because they are hurt themselves, or immature, or lucky enough never to have been in your situation (so they think they're better or stronger, or they don't understand the situation fully), or a plain old a*****e. Unless you are going around picking fights with people-- insulting them when they have genuinely tried to help, or peppering your first post with "If you say X then you suck and are dumb and should die"-- it's not about you. These people don't know you and they are just airing their own dirty laundry. You don't have to listen and you should do your best not to take it to heart. It is fundamentally the mean people's damage, not yours.

Fourth, I kind of stole your topic, but a lot of people seem to struggle with posting in LI and I thought this would be a good time to float these ideas out in case they could help. And...I think I know who you are talking about, if this is a one-specific-person kind of rant, and I agree. xd
Buttery Biscuit Face's avatar

Shameless Gawker

It's rare that I feel worse because I'm not stupid enough to put something that personal on something so close to the LD. On another note, I can be a huge a*****e when I reply, but yeah. Welcome to reality. People have personalities and mood changes everyday.
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The LI or any place you post for advice will get you the same responses as if you were asking a mass of people. Putting your information or issue out there is for EVERYONE to see. That means varying opinions that the original poster may not like. When someone posts it on the internet they should already be aware that not everyone will agree even to be nice. So I personally do not understand where the shock comes from.
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Yeah one particular person comes to mind. I mean sure everyone has their own way of approaching the problems of others. But there is a difference between being blunt and just being the b***h and the users who calls the OPs bitches and such are not being "blunt" they're just being assholes. You can get your point and advice across without cursing.

I mean after a while I get fed up with OPs when I see them making excuses as to why they can't take my advice or the advice of others but I don't swear at them and call them names.
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I don't go to Gaia for Life Issues. I tend to go to the smaller avi communities since they're much kinder about things. I've seen the same topic appear on Gaia and these communities, and while they give out similar replies, they're said much more nicely than on Gaia.
Fallacy Angel's avatar

Dangerous Lunatic

There are a couple of posters whom I find to be terribly rude and brash without much thought to the OP's feelings, or thoughts and I have those people blocked so I don't have to read their replies. Otherwise, I think there are a lot of people who give reasonably thought out advice here.
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Meta topics arent really meant the LI. Anyways, I know that I am probably one the list of people's worst at times, yet i am probably on some's best. You weirdos, why cant you just be one collective group on this?
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angel_259236102
Meta topics arent really meant the LI. Anyways, I know that I am probably one the list of people's worst at times, yet i am probably on some's best. You weirdos, why cant you just be one collective group on this?


I think it's a great deal of worse than best.
angel_259236102's avatar

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iDate Rape Cookie\
angel_259236102
Meta topics arent really meant the LI. Anyways, I know that I am probably one the list of people's worst at times, yet i am probably on some's best. You weirdos, why cant you just be one collective group on this?


I think it's a great deal of worse than best.


I dont keep tallies. But I find that the silly people who hate me are more likely to do it by interrupting people's topics and so it is more public. While people who love how i go about it tend to comment on my profile or Pm me, so it is more private. Also I do watch who tip's me, and so when I see some people tip me a lot in a row or like all the time (you know who you are) Obviously they are on the best side. So, it isnt like you could see those. I get pm's about how people like me actually more ofthen that you likely would think. Its weird.
iDate Rape C o o k i e's avatar

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angel_259236102
iDate Rape Cookie\
angel_259236102
Meta topics arent really meant the LI. Anyways, I know that I am probably one the list of people's worst at times, yet i am probably on some's best. You weirdos, why cant you just be one collective group on this?


I think it's a great deal of worse than best.


I dont keep tallies. But I find that the silly people who hate me are more likely to do it by interrupting people's topics and so it is more public. While people who love how i go about it tend to comment on my profile or Pm me, so it is more private. Also I do watch who tip's me, and so when I see some people tip me a lot in a row or like all the time (you know who you are) Obviously they are on the best side. So, it isnt like you could see those. I get pm's about how people like me actually more ofthen that you likely would think. Its weird.

Trying to prove something here?
angel_259236102's avatar

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iDate Rape Cookie\
angel_259236102
iDate Rape Cookie\
angel_259236102
Meta topics arent really meant the LI. Anyways, I know that I am probably one the list of people's worst at times, yet i am probably on some's best. You weirdos, why cant you just be one collective group on this?


I think it's a great deal of worse than best.


I dont keep tallies. But I find that the silly people who hate me are more likely to do it by interrupting people's topics and so it is more public. While people who love how i go about it tend to comment on my profile or Pm me, so it is more private. Also I do watch who tip's me, and so when I see some people tip me a lot in a row or like all the time (you know who you are) Obviously they are on the best side. So, it isnt like you could see those. I get pm's about how people like me actually more ofthen that you likely would think. Its weird.

Trying to prove something here?


No, I am not.I just know that I am on people's list of both and I can already tell you dont like me, even if I dont know if I talked to you personally before or not. So might as well make it clear that I do notice both and I do notice how people do it differently. You wanted a meta topic, you got it.
iDate Rape C o o k i e's avatar

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angel_259236102
iDate Rape Cookie\
angel_259236102
iDate Rape Cookie\
angel_259236102
Meta topics arent really meant the LI. Anyways, I know that I am probably one the list of people's worst at times, yet i am probably on some's best. You weirdos, why cant you just be one collective group on this?


I think it's a great deal of worse than best.


I dont keep tallies. But I find that the silly people who hate me are more likely to do it by interrupting people's topics and so it is more public. While people who love how i go about it tend to comment on my profile or Pm me, so it is more private. Also I do watch who tip's me, and so when I see some people tip me a lot in a row or like all the time (you know who you are) Obviously they are on the best side. So, it isnt like you could see those. I get pm's about how people like me actually more ofthen that you likely would think. Its weird.

Trying to prove something here?


No, I am not.I just know that I am on people's list of both and I can already tell you dont like me, even if I dont know if I talked to you personally before or not. So might as well make it clear that I do notice both and I do notice how people do it differently. You wanted a meta topic, you got it.

Actually there was no names given. So you're either very vain, or wanting the attention. I only replied to you because I see users who tell you to back off. So kindly, just back off.
Mimi Wildhart's avatar

Cutie-Pie

A lot comes to my mind:

-OPs' in LI are already emotionally sensitive because of whatever's stressing them out. It could be that they're just taking what others say and misinterpret the message/advice.

-OPs' could just be trolls. Sometimes there are convincing trolls.

-There is that whole 'blunt truth/advice' that some people like to throw, but that could be because the topic could be related to someone just not having common sense.

-This is still the internet, some people choose to be dicks/bitches. Or shouldn't be giving advice to someone else if they're not going to TRY being nice about someone else's problems.
angel_259236102's avatar

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iDate Rape Cookie\
angel_259236102
iDate Rape Cookie\
angel_259236102
iDate Rape Cookie\
angel_259236102
Meta topics arent really meant the LI. Anyways, I know that I am probably one the list of people's worst at times, yet i am probably on some's best. You weirdos, why cant you just be one collective group on this?


I think it's a great deal of worse than best.


I dont keep tallies. But I find that the silly people who hate me are more likely to do it by interrupting people's topics and so it is more public. While people who love how i go about it tend to comment on my profile or Pm me, so it is more private. Also I do watch who tip's me, and so when I see some people tip me a lot in a row or like all the time (you know who you are) Obviously they are on the best side. So, it isnt like you could see those. I get pm's about how people like me actually more ofthen that you likely would think. Its weird.

Trying to prove something here?


No, I am not.I just know that I am on people's list of both and I can already tell you dont like me, even if I dont know if I talked to you personally before or not. So might as well make it clear that I do notice both and I do notice how people do it differently. You wanted a meta topic, you got it.

Actually there was no names given. So you're either very vain, or wanting the attention. I only replied to you because I see users who tell you to back off. So kindly, just back off.

Wait...what? Like really..what?

So you not only imply that you agree that you think a lot of people dont like me, and have personally SEEN people tell me to 'back off', yet me acknowledging those things is being vain?

Lol...what? Or maybe I am not going to pretend that I am ignorant to other people and even if people dont name names, I KNOW that at least one person is talking about me because I do remember arguing with that person, and that if this continues that people will be at least referring to me at times, and wanted to give my input to the situation?

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