Help me I'm fat!: The "How to lose Weight" thread

[I got bored one day]

Nonesuch Solo

You can see why we satirize "weight loss ideas" here, with how readily people give advice that is incomplete, an outright lie, or even just what works for some as if it might work for all. Many people who are in shape, even if they have been overweight before and have worked it off, are all too willing to show lardballs how easy it is to lose weight, some even to the point of insulting our intelligence.

Simple process, but a lot of dedication. There's no secret to weight loss but most people are never taught ( and this should be mandatory as well, and part of P.E. ) how to exercise so it never gets done. The reason the professionals can take a 400 pound man back to 140 in under a year is because they know how to do it. There's really just no secret.

IDIOT.

[Vixianna]

You say she was never taught then proceed to call her an idiot. Very well played. Seriously though, could you manage to not be an a** for once?

[Xeno Incognito]

Cutie-pie Sleepyhead

Nonesuch Solo

You can see why we satirize "weight loss ideas" here, with how readily people give advice that is incomplete, an outright lie, or even just what works for some as if it might work for all. Many people who are in shape, even if they have been overweight before and have worked it off, are all too willing to show lardballs how easy it is to lose weight, some even to the point of insulting our intelligence.

Simple process, but a lot of dedication. There's no secret to weight loss but most people are never taught ( and this should be mandatory as well, and part of P.E. ) how to exercise so it never gets done. The reason the professionals can take a 400 pound man back to 140 in under a year is because they know how to do it. There's really just no secret.

IDIOT.

Oh, honey. That's what's wrong with some slimmer people. You think everyone who is considered overweight is that way because they're so ******** ignorant that it takes some magical program to make them lose weight.

Diets DON'T work. As soon as you get off them you just rubberband back. Personal trainers DON'T work. As soon as you stop using them you'll gain it back like crazy. Constant exercise will NOT make some people lose weight because of problems with their body. Every person is different.

You're assuming all overweight people don't exercise and all skinny people are healthy even though they don't exercise, which is a stupid generalization. It's not as simple as "PUT DOWN THE CAKE, FATTY" like some people think it is. rolleyes

[Xeno Incognito]

Olya

Xeno Incognito

Cutie-pie Sleepyhead

Nonesuch Solo

You can see why we satirize "weight loss ideas" here, with how readily people give advice that is incomplete, an outright lie, or even just what works for some as if it might work for all. Many people who are in shape, even if they have been overweight before and have worked it off, are all too willing to show lardballs how easy it is to lose weight, some even to the point of insulting our intelligence.

Simple process, but a lot of dedication. There's no secret to weight loss but most people are never taught ( and this should be mandatory as well, and part of P.E. ) how to exercise so it never gets done. The reason the professionals can take a 400 pound man back to 140 in under a year is because they know how to do it. There's really just no secret.

IDIOT.

Oh, honey. That's what's wrong with some slimmer people. You think everyone who is considered overweight is that way because they're so ******** ignorant that it takes some magical program to make them lose weight.

Diets DON'T work. As soon as you get off them you just rubberband back. Personal trainers DON'T work. As soon as you stop using them you'll gain it back like crazy. Constant exercise will NOT make some people lose weight because of problems with their body. Every person is different.

You're assuming all overweight people don't exercise and all skinny people are healthy even though they don't exercise, which is a stupid generalization. It's not as simple as "PUT DOWN THE CAKE, FATTY" like some people think it is. rolleyes

We all meandered through our schooling haphazard; so, to God be thanks,

You've made just as many assumptions and, in many ways, her assumptions are better than yours - at least hers are a little more motivational.

...it's easy, without too much fooling, to pass for cultured in our ranks.

what, pray tell, was so bad about my post?

I don't consider insulting someone's intelligence and then calling them an idiot "motivational".

[Vixianna]

Oh course it's just as easy as that. All of have to do is never to rarely eat and exercise till you drop, all while keeping your busy everyday life schedule. Should be easy, so get to it fattie! Me? Oh no I don't have to do that because I'm thin, which means I'll never get fat, and am exempt from dieting and exercise, so snap to it lardass.

[I got bored one day]

Xeno Incognito

Cutie-pie Sleepyhead

Nonesuch Solo

You can see why we satirize "weight loss ideas" here, with how readily people give advice that is incomplete, an outright lie, or even just what works for some as if it might work for all. Many people who are in shape, even if they have been overweight before and have worked it off, are all too willing to show lardballs how easy it is to lose weight, some even to the point of insulting our intelligence.

Simple process, but a lot of dedication. There's no secret to weight loss but most people are never taught ( and this should be mandatory as well, and part of P.E. ) how to exercise so it never gets done. The reason the professionals can take a 400 pound man back to 140 in under a year is because they know how to do it. There's really just no secret.

IDIOT.

Oh, honey. That's what's wrong with some slimmer people. You think everyone who is considered overweight is that way because they're so ******** ignorant that it takes some magical program to make them lose weight.

Diets DON'T work. As soon as you get off them you just rubberband back. Personal trainers DON'T work. As soon as you stop using them you'll gain it back like crazy. Constant exercise will NOT make some people lose weight because of problems with their body. Every person is different.

You're assuming all overweight people don't exercise and all skinny people are healthy even though they don't exercise, which is a stupid generalization. It's not as simple as "PUT DOWN THE CAKE, FATTY" like some people think it is. rolleyes

Well that's why I think excercise should be taught, it'll be geared more on how to do it rather than why. Self-motivation is also a skill that should be taught, as well as learning and studying, and reason, but none of these things, core as they may be to all functions, are. Knowing how to exercise and stay healthy ( and recognizing bad health ) is far more important than worrying about your size.

[Asevenex]

Vixianna

Oh course it's just as easy as that. All of have to do is never to rarely eat and exercise till you drop, all while keeping your busy everyday life schedule. Should be easy, so get to it fattie! Me? Oh no I don't have to do that because I'm thin, which means I'll never get fat, and am exempt from dieting and exercise, so snap to it lardass.

I understand what you're doing, but I hope you know insults won't work on some people.

[Nonesuch Solo]

Vixianna

Xeno Incognito

Vixi, trolling? This is a pleasant surprise. rofl

Who me? Oh you know I never troll? 4laugh

@ No such: So vague, would that be because no one can ever manage to give you actual advice on how to lose weight? That sounds about right, but hun, don't you know? We are working on those super-leeches/maggots and they will be able to help soon. In the meantime an intestinal worm would really help with weight loss, say something like one for a pork product, not so much flat worms from fish.

My husband, ever-annoyed at my insistence in posting on Gaia and especially at my frustration in the weight-loss department, told me last night that when he was growing up there were dozens of different products on the market to treat hair loss. And then, when something came out that actually worked, all the different snake-oil salesmen disappeared. Poof. He tells me I just need to "wait until the same thing happens for the weight-loss industry."

Sigh..... ^_^

[Nonesuch Solo]

Cutie-pie Sleepyhead

Nonesuch Solo

You can see why we satirize "weight loss ideas" here, with how readily people give advice that is incomplete, an outright lie, or even just what works for some as if it might work for all. Many people who are in shape, even if they have been overweight before and have worked it off, are all too willing to show lardballs how easy it is to lose weight, some even to the point of insulting our intelligence.

Simple process, but a lot of dedication. There's no secret to weight loss but most people are never taught ( and this should be mandatory as well, and part of P.E. ) how to exercise so it never gets done. The reason the professionals can take a 400 pound man back to 140 in under a year is because they know how to do it. There's really just no secret.

IDIOT.

You miss my point. When somebody tells me "I just did X and it worked for me," that does not mean it will work for me. Case in point, the "South Beach Diet." My mom dropped a decent amount of weight in phase one, but I did not. Or how about people who say "I just took a brisk walk every evening after dinner, and I lost ten pounds in a month!" I tried that, didn't do a damn thing.

I'm just amazed at all the little tips and tricks that people offer up as though they are THE solution when in reality--like you said--it can take an immense amount of dedication. If I understand the "simple process" correctly, I can anticipate being VERY hungry, VERY sore, VERY tired, and otherwise completely miserable for at least the first three weeks of any program I commit to. The question for this particular fatty is, do I want to make that sacrifice at this point in my life? You can guess how I answer that.

Vixianna--don't worry, I've been called an idiot by Death and Misery before. I'm not quite as shocked this time 'round. cheese_whine

[I got bored one day]

Nonesuch Solo

Cutie-pie Sleepyhead

Nonesuch Solo

You can see why we satirize "weight loss ideas" here, with how readily people give advice that is incomplete, an outright lie, or even just what works for some as if it might work for all. Many people who are in shape, even if they have been overweight before and have worked it off, are all too willing to show lardballs how easy it is to lose weight, some even to the point of insulting our intelligence.

Simple process, but a lot of dedication. There's no secret to weight loss but most people are never taught ( and this should be mandatory as well, and part of P.E. ) how to exercise so it never gets done. The reason the professionals can take a 400 pound man back to 140 in under a year is because they know how to do it. There's really just no secret.

IDIOT.

You miss my point. When somebody tells me "I just did X and it worked for me," that does not mean it will work for me. Case in point, the "South Beach Diet." My mom dropped a decent amount of weight in phase one, but I did not. Or how about people who say "I just took a brisk walk every evening after dinner, and I lost ten pounds in a month!" I tried that, didn't do a damn thing.

I'm just amazed at all the little tips and tricks that people offer up as though they are THE solution when in reality--like you said--it can take an immense amount of dedication. If I understand the "simple process" correctly, I can anticipate being VERY hungry, VERY sore, VERY tired, and otherwise completely miserable for at least the first three weeks of any program I commit to. The question for this particular fatty is, do I want to make that sacrifice at this point in my life? You can guess how I answer that.

Vixianna--don't worry, I've been called an idiot by Death and Misery before. I'm not quite as shocked this time 'round. cheese_whine

Myth

If I understand the "simple process" correctly, I can anticipate being VERY hungry, VERY sore, VERY tired, and otherwise completely miserable for at least the first three weeks of any program I commit to.

If you're very tired, very sore, and very hungry from correctly working on your physical conditioning you need to see a doctor. Exercise is not about pain. Exercise is not about suffering. Exercise is actually the opposite.

If you feel sick after exercise something's wrong. You don't run yourself ragged, that is not how proper exercise works. It does take a lot of dedication, but both dieting ( the 10% ) and exercise ( the 90% ) are not meant to kill you.

The reason why I want it taught is for that very reason!

[calamito]

You don't have to be a stick to be beautiful. Curves are beautiful.

[Darth_Nader]

Xeno Incognito

Cutie-pie Sleepyhead

Nonesuch Solo

You can see why we satirize "weight loss ideas" here, with how readily people give advice that is incomplete, an outright lie, or even just what works for some as if it might work for all. Many people who are in shape, even if they have been overweight before and have worked it off, are all too willing to show lardballs how easy it is to lose weight, some even to the point of insulting our intelligence.

Simple process, but a lot of dedication. There's no secret to weight loss but most people are never taught ( and this should be mandatory as well, and part of P.E. ) how to exercise so it never gets done. The reason the professionals can take a 400 pound man back to 140 in under a year is because they know how to do it. There's really just no secret.

IDIOT.

Oh, honey. That's what's wrong with some slimmer people. You think everyone who is considered overweight is that way because they're so ******** ignorant that it takes some magical program to make them lose weight.

Diets DON'T work. As soon as you get off them you just rubberband back. Personal trainers DON'T work. As soon as you stop using them you'll gain it back like crazy. Constant exercise will NOT make some people lose weight because of problems with their body. Every person is different.

You're assuming all overweight people don't exercise and all skinny people are healthy even though they don't exercise, which is a stupid generalization. It's not as simple as "PUT DOWN THE CAKE, FATTY" like some people think it is. rolleyes

You failed to understand his point completely, and also; you're wrong.

1. yes, diets dont work, but thats because they're based around caloric restriction and not helping your body become thinner as a standard. Yes, diet is a huge part of the obesity problem, but the focus on total net calories or carbs is wrong: I probably eat more calories now than I did when I was overweight, they just come from different sources and at different times of day ( good rule of thumb; no carbs after sundown. Try it, just that, and call me in 4 weeks)

2. As far as personal trainers; I agree, they don't work because people only keep them around until they lose the weight, and once they're gone, go back to their old lifestyles.

Your body has a set metabolism in which is allows your weight to vary, roughly, by 10% of your "standard" weight. You have to lose said 10%, make that new weight your standard weight by keeping it that way long enough ( this is often called a plateau by personal trainers, and their advice is to work out harder, especially in terms of cardio. Bullshit, keep your cardio routine steady work on muscle. Only increase your cardio workout AFTER your "plateau" is done with) and the you will work towards losing 10% of your new weight, and so forth.
Once you're at a new physical stage for a while, you can, in fact, slcak off and keep your weight as is. I dropped 40 pounds in 6 months last year and kept up my routine for about another 4 months. Now, if for some reason ( travel, work, etc) I cant hit the gym every day for an extended period of time ( last time I worked out was tuesday. Last time I went every day in a week was july) I dont gain that weight back. Its a significant compromise, and the problem is that its much harder the first year to keep your weight donw than it is the rest of your life, which is why so many people relapse