Word Count: 736
His dreams had been pleasant fantasy, thoughts turned to moss-covered glens in the middle of rich, exotic woods where the trees were ancient and the flowers perfumed the air so that when he’d woken, Glyph had sat there in a mild fog, smiling as one might when kissed by a lover and sighed. The ever present knot in heart hadn’t eased, no, but there was a warmth suffusing him that had nothing at all to do with the chill of the evening.
Thoughts of love hung heaving in his mind as he lifted his face to the sky and regarded the half-obscured stars. He missed Illisia, damnit. Her strength and fire drew him like a moth to the flame and he saw flashes of it in Xun whenever they met… saw things, that if was honest with himself, that he liked in Xun just as much. But the dragon had very clearly laid out boundaries between them and Glyph had had no choice but to respect them.
Even then… he wasn’t sure if his longing for Xun, suddenly so much more potent now then it was before, was because of Illisia or the dragon himself. The Night Elf would forever be a part of Xun, Glyph knew, and it tangled his emotions greatly. He loved Illisia, likely would so long as he carried her memory, but did that love skew his view of Xun? He was afraid that it had coloured his opinion, had tried to keep the tiny feeling in his heart from growing for fear of complicating his friendship with Xun.
Still… this feeling, this warmth, it wasn’t the sorrow of Illisia’s loss nor the joy of her love, it was something different and it confused Forest, forced him to look critically at himself. Why was he feeling this way? Attempts to dismiss Xun from his mind had failed miserably, thoughts of Illisia had inevitably curled and morphed into an appreciation of Xun… they were one and the same now , but neither as well. He brought a hand up to his chest, curling the fingers into a fist as he dropped his gaze and closed his eyes.
Xun… the name played across his mind with ease and familiarity. It scared him…
Those eyes, the smile… the teasing, playful tone of that voice made mildly masculine by Xun… Forest smiled despite himself, tucking his chin against his chest.
He enjoyed their playful banter, worried for the other’s well being… wished for more company as the dragon soothed him in ways few others did.
The answer struck him after several long moments of reflection and he laughed out loud, frustrated with himself. It was love he felt now and for none other than Xun, Lifewater – and not, he realized, because of misplaced emotions. He loved Illisia, yes, and while that might have driven him in part before, the feeling that now curled in his chest was somewhat different. It didn’t change the fact he was scared, though, and he puffed out his cheeks as he leaned back, stretching legs out before him.
Coming to the realization he was attracted to Xun didn’t help matters remotely – he’d been certain the dragon wanted only to be friends, had maintained the friendship in honour of Illisia, and while Glyph was appreciative of that, he wasn’t sure it would be… healthy to continue on as they were. It had hurt to lose Illisia, and it would continue to ache if he loved Xun but the feeling was not mutual. Gods they might be, but emotion still drove them… especially matters of the heart.
He bit his lip, torn. Glyph wanted to find Xun if for no other reason to delight in his company but he unsure of the wisdom of that, wondering why now of all times, he was pining for the dragon kind. Sometimes it was better to remain in ignorance… Rising at length, he found the box overrun with ants and frowned, shooing them away as he replaced the lid. Had Adi and he really eaten all of it? Hard to believe! Smiling, he found she’d gone sometime before he’d woken. He loved Adi too, held a fatherly attitude towards the joyful innocent. When she was ready, he would gladly accept her into his service as an Aoide.
Gathering up the mushrooms too, he began the long walk back to the Pantheon, wanting to time to think.