"What is this? Is it supposed to be an owl? This is not an owl. This thing couldn't catch a damn rodent to save its life, it'd starve, in the cold of winter. Dead."
PRECISELY THIS! It is barely worth the title of a feathered fowl.
Not even that, upon secondary inspection.
I dare not peek a third time lest I be apt to hurt myself and those around me. Possibly with this thing.