One day, I am happy. Next, I hate life. That is normal, but I got no one to talk anymore. Which is not normal. Cause He broke up with me. The guy I cared about the most thought we were asking too much of each other. At first, I think he is right than I think he is wrong. He wants me to believe he is right like always but I goign believe in my side of the story. That is a jerk and weak. Don't get me wrong, he was a great guy but he had his faults. Just like me, but he made feel like I had a lot.
Also he told me he broke up with me because I was getting upset at him all the time. I got a right! Why? Because he wouldn't talk to me on the phone like we always do! True me, I was pretty up with it for awhile before I started getting mad each time. I also do it too but at least, I try those.
I cried and cried to him (since he was still my best friend) and he said if i want him back I have to say I am sorry in person. He said he would too if he liek my sorry. I was so happy but I kind of thinking now, what a jerk! If he really want me, he would I took me back right than and there.
It been a week since we broke-up and it still hurt but I been more open, just like he made me to be, which is good. It sucks when I see his friends somewhere. They look at me different now like it was all my fault! At least, I am still talking to one of his best friend by email.
I even had a crush on him even when I was still my boyfriend. Maybe it was message that my boyfriend is not the one. Yet, it turned a little bit ugly. Long story on that. His best friend still dating his girlfriend, who I like. Yet I am still jealous. Yeah, I have my dreams, ok? I am human. I do dumb things. Yet, my boyfriend didn't think that is not good. What am I saying, I am just mad. Maybe it is true. I should not believe those.
So, I listening to my love songs and break up songs now. Even read books. Going to church I have talk to my ex in 4 days, like it matters. If he still wanted ot be best friend, he would talk me. Like I always had to do. Man, even felt like a stalk call him lik ehe was my best friend. Gosh, this sucks.
So if you are writing this, hopeful you will would not think I am horrible girl. Hopefully, you understand. If you want me to keep writing, comment and rate high. Or if you want to be my friend, just pm me. It would be good to have friends.
Love Will Do
- Title: Day after Day 11/24
- Artist: Once Upon A Winter
- Description: I am starting this just so i can get my feelings out on love
- Date: 11/24/2009
- Tags: after